Working as a handyman was the best fucking job ever. Literally.
In college, I majored in beer pong and pussy. Everyone called me Gunner because I always hit my target. But after WAY too much partying, I had to get a real job. Dammit, I thought the good times were over...
Boy, was I wrong.
My dad hired me to work in his handyman business. "Gunner, this is balls-down the best job you'll ever have! Lots of mobile home repairs. Lots of single women."
For my first handyman job, my dad showed me how to fix up an old mobile home. I did, and it turned out great. His neighbor Fannie came over to check it out.
Fannie was a big-titted, brassy blonde. Putting her hands on her hips, she stuck out her chest and looked around. "Wow, you did a fucking good job. My fucking trailer is falling apart."
Fannie looked me up and down. "I'll fucking hire you. How much do you fucking charge?"
"Not much. Do you want to see the bedroom?" She smiled and shook her head. "Maybe later sailor. But you can fix up my living room. It's a fucking dump."
Fannie left, and I looked at my dad. "She sure likes to say fuck a lot."
"Yep." He laughed. "Maybe she likes to fuck a lot?"
Fannie paid me half up front. But after I finished, she refused to pay the rest. "I don't have the fucking money, and you can't squeeze blood from a fucking turnip."
I told my dad.
"She's got a pussy, right? Go back and don't leave until you get Cash or Ass. That's my motto— Cash or Ass. That brassy bitch needs a good boning." He laughed. "And bring me her panties."
Fannie answered the door, glaring at me. "Jerk, what the fuck do you want?"
"I want paid. NOW!" She flipped me off and tried to slam the door, but I forced my way inside. Fear flashed in her eyes.
"Look, there ain't no fucking money!"
"Now Fannie, you know there's another way to pay." I pushed her into the bedroom. She tried to slap me, but I shoved her down on her bed,... a stained mattress on the floor.
"Are you going to screw me?"
"Do you need a good screwing!"
"No, I fucking don't! But if I did, would that make us even?"
"No. This is just the first payment— a stiff payment." I locked the door and dropped my pants. Fannie watched my boner stretch out and stiffen.
"Oh fuck, it looks hard and happy." Fannie didn't struggle when I pulled off her dress and flipped up her bra cups, letting her big jugs bounce out. I sucked her pierced nipples.
The blonde dropped her tiger-striped panties, displaying her trimmed vee of curly gold pubes, with a pink slit peeking out. I put the panties in my pocket and rubbed her warm pussy, pushing a finger in her juice box..
Fannie sighed and spread herself wide for me.
She was wet and ready. I climbed over, sucked her tits, and shoved my prick straight up her cunt. She grabbed my neck, lifting her hips. "Ooh! Oh, Gunner—Oh Jesus— you got a fucking big one!"
"And Fannie, you got a body built to fuck."
"Really Gunner?" She humped me harder. "Say that again sailor."
"Baby, you're built to fuck! You're a tigress!"
"Oooh!" Her claws gripped my back as she humped. A minute later, I shot my first load inside her sweet snatch, but my prick stayed hard as I kept screwing her twisting pussy. This time Fannie fucked back.
"Oh my god, oh my fucking god!"
The bucking blonde made little grunting sounds. Soon Fannie's back arched in orgasm, with her cunt muscles crushed my prick until I spewed a second load.
Fannie kissed me and giggled. "Wow Gunner you fucking stud, I did need a good screwing." She winked. "Is there anything else I could do for you, like blow your balls off?"
"How about some naughty pics?"
"Sure sailor. I bet you want me to spread my legs wide for a crotch shot? Don't you? Just like those dirty girls on the internet. That's what you fucking want, me to pose like a dirty girl?
Fannie giggled and spread herself for my cell camera. I snapped some pics of her big tits and moved in for a pic of her cream-pie cunt... Fannie actually blushed.
I sent the pics to my dad. He texted back. "Balls deep is the only way to go!"
As I walked out the front door, Fannie yelled, "Dammit Gunner, where are my fucking panties!?"
The next day my dad warned me, "Be careful with these bitches. Every one of them will try to hook you." My dad whispered. "That's why women have pussy hair— to hide the hook!" He fell over laughing.
"Gunner, I'll have another job for you tomorrow, a young mother named Lupita. She has a leaking faucet and a toilet that keeps running. And she wants to make payments."
"I love payments." Dad laughed. "And I bet she has a hole or two that need filled."
Lupita was a pretty little Latina. Dark hair, bronze skin, and clear brown eyes. I walked in, and she sat there holding a baby to her fat tit. She pulled the baby away, and I watched milk dripping from her stretched nipple. Cool.
Looking up at me, she flashed a worried smile. "You fix bathroom, yes?"
Grabbing my tools, I followed Lupita. I loved the way she wiggled her ass. Lupita pointed out the leaks and sat on the sofa. Repairing the leaks wasn't any big deal. And the toilet was a quick fix.
Lupita knew I'd finished, but she just stared at me. Was she hoping I'd just leave? I wasn't about to go without getting paid. I held out my hand, and she shook her head.
So I pointed to her bed.
Lupita shrugged her shoulders, stood up, and wiggled her butt into the bedroom. Wow, she didn't resist at all. Lupita stood by her bed. "You want me for girlfriend?"
"Sure honey, you can be my girlfriend."
The curvy Latina dropped her dress, took off her red bra and panties, and lay down on the bed, display her dark furry vee. I dropped my pants. Lupita closed her eyes like she didn't want to see my rigid prick.
I eagerly sucked her milky titties, letting her mother's milk squirt in my mouth. My hand felt between her legs and fingered her fuck-hole to get it wet. Climbing between her brown thighs, I shoved my prick in.
"Aiyeee!" Lupita cried, and her eyes popped wide open. I fucked her sweet pussy and sucked more milk out of her swollen titties. I love mother's milk. My prick swelled, ready to burst.
Lupita screamed, "Don't make baby juice inside me. I not on pill."
So I pulled out. "Roll over Lupita." She frowned and rolled on her belly. I plunged my prick up her sweet little butthole. OOOW!" Lupita screamed and gripped the bed as I pounded away at her asshole.
Little Lupita whimpered with every stroke. I continued to ream out her tight anus. Soon I spewed my load and collapsed on her back. I kept my prick deep in her butt. She didn't try to push me off until the baby cried.
"Nino's hungry." I rolled off, and she breastfed him while wiping her ass.
Now Lupita wanted her breast pump fixed. So I did and pumped her tits for a bit. Then I had her drop to her knees and pump my prick. She swallowed and looked up. "Mr. Gunner, will you be coming tomorrow here... por favor?"
"Sure honey, I'll be cumming. Have your pussy shaved for me."
"Oh okay, Senor Stud."
The next day I stopped at Fannie's with a bed frame for her old mattress. She looked at it. "That's fucking great Gunner, let's try it out." Fannie stripped off her clothes, got on all fours, and barked.
"I want you to fuck me doggie style. Get behind me."
"Don't tell me what to do!"
"Fucking stick it in me already!" She shook her butt.
I moved behind the bossy blonde, gripped her hips, and plunged my prick into her hot pussy. She groaned, "Oh yes, Fucking ride me cowboy, ride me hard." Grabbing her tits, I pulled back and thrust in deep.
"Fuck me faster, Gunner, faster." So I pounded her bossy pussy. Fannie humped me back, and soon the bitch gave a strangled cry, jolting in orgasm. "FUCK— cum inside me."
My prick spurted, and I felt her clenching pussy milking my shaft, filling her cunt. After the last spurt, I collapsed on her back. She barked. "Fucking get off me, Gunner, I'm leaking."
"No! I'm gonna show you what happens to bossy bitches." My hand whacked Fannie's butt cheeks. She cussed and squirmed and screamed. But I kept whacking her ass until it glowed red.
And the more I spanked her, the harder I got. I decided to show Fannie, who was the real boss. My Dick. When I spread her ass-cheeks, she looked back at me. "What the fuck are you doing?"
I pushed my boner into her anus. "Ouch, stop that!" I slapped her ass hard as I drove deeper into her butthole. Fannie tried to get up, but I held her down, gripped her hair, and butt-fucked her like a bitch.
When I pulled out, she spun around. "You fucking bastard! You fucking hurt me!" Fannie wiped her sore butt and giggled. "Well, I guess I deserved an assfucking."
"Gunner, if you want you could stay for dinner and do me for dessert."
"Sorry, I'm plenty busy right now."
"Yeah, I saw you at that bitch Lupita's. Gunner, I'm a much better screw than she is. I used to be a professional." Fannie handed me a key. "Now you don't have to knock. You can fucking bang me anytime."
She rubbed my crotch. "Hey Gunner, I haven't sucked your fucking cock yet."
"Maybe later." She looked disappointed, so I let her polish my knob and swallow down a load of cum.
That night my dad warned me again about women getting their claws into me. I remembered that when I went back over to Lupita's.
"Gunner, you fix the light?" The bedroom light was out. For all I knew, the light bulb just needed changing, but I wasn't going to check.
"Do you have any money for the work I've already done?" Lupita shook her head and pouted. "But I'm your girlfriend, sí?"
She lifted her skirt. "And I shave my coochie for you. You bring rubbers?"
"Yep. Get naked."
She dropped her dress and lifted her legs wide, like a gymnast on a balance beam.
I fucked the hell out of her Lapita's pussy—twice. Then I checked the light and found the switch needed replacement. I told her I had to come back later, so I needed a key to her trailer. An idea I got from Fannie.
"Because I might need to screw you when the baby is asleep. You don't want to wake the baby, do you?" She shook her head and handed me the key.
"Mr. Gunner, maybe you want to move in with me? And be my baby daddy."
"Nope. Nope. Never." I ran out with a satisfied dick but no money.
Fortunately, there were plenty of customers who actually paid in cash. Getting paid in pussy is fun, but it don't cover the bills.