DisAster Allegations (June 14, 2025 Update)
Human Transcribe Bro: a transcription of "a sincere apology and my truth."
Source - Delulu Deliria: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21kTD1QzCQM
Archive (Archive anon): https://warosu.org/vt/thread/101185067#p101187319
AI Transcription (Another Anon): https://warosu.org/vt/thread/101185067#p101188362
ERM CONTEXT???
I'm not going to hold your hand, if you want to see the full timeline of the allegations, there's plenty of posts on the internet. If you want to see everything with context, go find it yourself, this is already a long ass document.
Risk of Errors:
This is a human transcription of Delulu Deliria's statement and allegations in the sourced video above. It is always best for you to consult the original source for the original messaging.
Even the AI transcription is not always perfect and might miss some words based on the original thread I've seen. And of course, I as the human author may misinterpret or mishear words, some context may be missing that does not tell the full story. If an autist is so adamant on telling the full story, by all means, go ahead with your document.
THESE ARE ALLEGATIONS AND NOT THE TRUTH
The last time rrats and allegations were spread around, many many people assumed it was the truth.
This is a he-said versus she-said matter and anyone assuming one is saying the complete truth or not, is a complete fool and their opinions should be discarded if they look at this rentry and assume it's all correct. THESE ARE ALLEGATIONS, FAGGOT.
Purpose
I am making this rentry based on anon's request in my original posts: https://warosu.org/vt/thread/101185067#p101190178
I have continued and completed my transcription in another thread: https://boards.4chan.org/vt/thread/101187485
Regardless, I am making this rentry to avoid the typical game of telephone that will occur with long statements in streams. This rentry is not an endorsement of any parties involved, it is documenting public allegations in an attempt to avoid narrative shifting and typical misinformation that occurs in these scenarios.
Transcription
101187769 (me)
I am the human transcription bro, going to go through this now. It takes a while
0:00 - 1:54 = dead silence
1:55 - 2:45
Hello, uh, everyone. It's been a while, um I wanted to start off by saying that this stream is somewhat scripted. There are a lot of things that I do want to address today and I want to keep my thoughts somewhat organized.
I wanted to acknowledge that first off that what I'm about to say I don't want this to come off as an attack on anyone or try to justify the things that I have said or done. I just want to share with you my truth and my experience and my feelings about everything that's happened I guess.
2:46 - 3:28
I wanted to say that I'm genuinely sorry, I know it's hard to believe coming from someone who said all of that disgusting stuff and, I don't know, I guess I just wanted to say that I do wish to be a better person. I didn't say that statement to try and you know, get apologies for me. I know that I want to be a better person going forward and that's something that's not going to change and will not change.
3:29 - 4:29
I think it's kind of hard to believe for a lot of people when I say that I'm not the person I was a few months ago, and that's okay, I don't think I'm totally 100% reformed, you know? I'm not perfect, but, I do think that your life experiences can shape the person that you are and I think a lot of people maybe have misunderstood me and so I just wanted to clarify. I use to think that words were just words and that is true. Everything I said just had no meaning and I didn't say things because I hated people or was angry with them - just said them to say them without even thinking it all.
4:30 - 5:24
But just in the past few months in meeting a lot of people and kind of expanding my worldview, I freely do not think that way anymore. I kind of realized now that words do have meanings, you know, and implications, and everything that can really hurt. And these are things that I genuinely do regret and I really intend to never repeat - I am truly truly sorry if I hurt you and I hope that regardless of forgiveness that you'd be able to heal from my words that means that I do want to clarify a few things that I have seen.
5:25 - 6:41
First off, me deleting my post had absolutely nothing to do with my statement - I was not aware of the video even leaked until I think a few hours after it has been posted to YouTube. And I already kind of felt like I was on the path of becoming a kinder and more positive person and that was the point where I felt like maybe my personal accounts sort of reflect that.
I have never and will never post any anti-LGBT or racist rhetoric, I am not a political streamer and do not intend to be - I believe these are changes need to be made in my personal life and I just do not want my community to be made out of hatred and also maybe this is stupid to bring up, I am going to say it regardless - yes, I hate Yaoi. I am personally not attracted to anime men.
101188482 (me)
101188858
You're welcome, there's also lots of telephone games when these things happen so this helps me process this properly. A good example is how people call Twisty transphobic when it was more about some vtuber having trans pride on a bio lmao.
6:42 - 7:57
It's kind of a two is worse than one situation for me. Any tweets regarding that were just in reference to my friends talking about the BL in the groupchat and me just poking fun of them at it for it. I guess moving on, sorry if this is switching topics, but I do want to speak about my experience.
I mean I'm sure a lot of you are probably not least surprised to see this stream from me. I thought kind of a lot if this is something I even wanted to get into.
I know there are a lot of rumors and speculation going around, I wanted to speak about my experience at my job and certain people. and I guess yo u know, I wanted to put it out there, this is something I didn't want to be sensationalized.
This is a personal and emotional matter to me and I never intended for things to have to come to light and I feel sorry that they have.
7:58 - 9:00
I guess I'll start with the job part, you know something that was kind of once presented as a dream opportunity - well very it quickly just turned into a lot of stress and disappointment and disillusionment and over the past year, I've received very little on that support I was promised - I'm sorry if this is all going to come out as blunt, this is just my personal experience working and I know other people had very varied ones. So, this isn't meant to be all woe, you know this person is lying? Because some people I do believe have had positive experiences that - this is just mine.
101189165 (me)
9:01 - 10:14
The entire environment was just - it was filled with constant ongoing delays and a lot of the communication was very unclear and lacking. And I feel that overall, it was just a very toxic and uncomfortable work culture.
When I joined, we were asked to delete all personal and professional social media accounts and to step away from any existing jobs IRL or otherwise. To commit fully to this new opportunity and in return, I am -
pauses quite a bit and voice is very very quiet
I received what I feel like was minimal support and visibility and promotion to be able to sustain myself throughout the new transition.
And because of lot of unforeseen delays that fell shortly after onboarding - I went nearly 8 months without steady income and majority of my first paycheck was used to cover required work-related expenses.
10:15 - 11:22
In July 2024, I raised concerns about inappropriate behavior and misconduct within the company. I will try and clarify a little later by what I mean by that.
voice gets even quieter
The individual in question had a known history of manipulation and targeting new hires, especially women.
Despite this, I was told that no action would be taken to the fear of retaliation.
These, if you swear not new, they even have been brought up long before I joined
But, no meaningful steps were even taken to address them
I feel like the toll this took on me was severe and my mental health wasn't in a really good place to begin with and it deteriorated to the point where I could no longer function that I once had.
101189469 (me)
11:23 - 12:33
I have had to withdraw from multiple voice acting opportunities because I couldn't even get myself to record for anything without just breaking down and crying
and I remember long time sitting in front of my desk, going to a waiting room (live stream waiting room), feeling like 10 minutes (has passed) and I was just sitting there trying to calm myself down and you know, be able to entertain my fans
But I just ended up ending stream before it began because I broken down in tears but I really couldn't get myself to stop crying
It felt like the entire time, no one believed me, and that I had to stay quiet despite what I was going through
I was told not to speak about this with anyone, not with my coworkers, no one. Just to never speak of it or mention it again
12:34 - 13:03
I felt like I just couldn't risk showing what was really going on to the world
And because of that I made a lot of mistakes
Together with some of my coworkers, I pleaded for the situation to be taken seriously
I emphasized that without proper intervention, the consequences would fall on everyone.
But still, nothing had changed
13:04 - 13:52
In November 2024, staff were made aware that private conversations had been leaked online
We urged them to respond or to prepare for the fallout of everything
Nearly a month passed with no communication, nor action, until a video was published and public backlash forced the situation - kind of - out into the open
I was then instructed to take a break from my work following an announcement of an investigation
Despite this, I never once felt like my concerns were ever meaningfully addressed
Most conversations were focused not on resolving the matter but on managing my exit.
101189764 (me)
13:53 - 16:05
I remember, the first call we had for I would say 80% of it, I was explaining vtuber culture and kind of what vtubers were
and for the other 20%, I've explained my experience with 'this person' and then you know, I felt like I didn't have very much time to really delve into everything
and I was told that they would follow-up and that we would speak more but that never happened
Any following conversations pretty much happened because after questioning and questioning for a response on anything, I eventually kind of just broke down and said I wanted to quit and I wanted out, and immediately they got back to me
and everything following that was details surrounding my leave and my exit, but to this day that I'm not confident on any real investigation that ever took place
I know they were very clear on not admitting on any fault in any way
and I just wanted to be honest, you know, at one point - there were talks of a settlement and I personally do not believe if they truly did nothing wrong, then that would've been something that they even considered
but ultimately it is something that I have decided against
And I want to make it clear that I do have documentation to support my claims including acknowledgements from the person involved and I will talk a bit more about that a little bit later.
Their behavior, has been reported to staff so many times over the years, and it has been well-documented and recognized as an issue
16:06 - 16:45
On top of this, another coworker had leaked my outfit just 10 minutes after I had privately shared it
Not only that did they expose something that I was really excited to be able to reveal to my fans and community but
they also added a lot of very mean and what I believe were very manipulative comments to stir up drama in an attempt to implicate me
what I feel like should have been a really happy moment was just completely ruined
Contexts:
- investigation PR tweet = https://x.com/NIJISANJI_World/status/1865939579280441670
- coworker is speculated to be Reimu in this thread
101190044 (me)
16:46 - 17:22
I am going to try and shed some light on to the other situation now and I'm going to be honest
this is going to be kind of a very difficult conversation for me
And I'm sorry if I can't convey myself properly
there are a lot of things that have happened, so I apologize that this is not as conclusive as it should be or if things are out of place in terms of time or missing proper context
17:23 - 19:08
When I first met 'this person', they were very friendly and we bonded over games
They kept on pushing me to play games
And although I really didn't want to
I eventually agreed because I just wanted to have a good relationship with all of my coworkers
Over time, their behavior has started to shift
I feel like once they felt more comfortable, they began calling me more often
Making extremely flirty compliments about my - my appearance and my voice
And they would often ask me to say specific things or calls or phrases for them so that they could hear it in my voice
They would bring up my ASMR in a way that made me feel extremely extremely uncomfortable
They would want to call with me, more and more, acting overly familiar and constantly just putting me down - calling me weird, asking if I was mentally disabled or had Tourettes and claiming that other - (??)
unintelligible, just heard a sss noise - this might have been edited out but we can guess coworkers or staff, feels like omitted out for liability purposes
at work were uncomfortable around me
This really hurt at the time but I later had found out from another coworker that this wasn't true and that manipulation and bullying were just a pattern of his.
I'll continue my transcription posts in this next thread plus I'm at the Aster part already.
source: [YouTube] a sincere apology and my truth. (embed)
101190388 (Cross-thread) (me)
19:09 - 19:55
I remember one time during a call and they just kept repeating like 'why can't you be normal? Why can't you just be normal?" and - I don't know
as someone who has never really fit in, it kind of just hit very hard
during one of these calls, they brought up the idea on meeting up in Japan
I've always been a shy person but I also struggled with severe agoraphobia
even something as simple as going to the grocery store can end in a panic attack for me which is something that I have already mentioned before
19:56 - 21:06
When they suggested meeting up, I kind of explained again that I wouldn't feel comfortable and I even said that if I were in Japan, I probably wouldn't even leave my hotel room
Their response made me kind of uneasy
Instead of respecting the boundary that I have set, they kept pushing - saying that 'I didn't really seem like that type of person to him'
He would continue with things like 'what if we were in Japan together?'
To which I would state like 'Regardless, of who was with me, I would still feel extremely uncomfortable'
They then said 'what if I was in Japan with you and I held your hand?'
And you know, I told him like 'that wouldn't change how I felt'
And they followed up with 'what if I hugged you?'
I repeated that I still wouldn't feel comfortable with him
And what I interpreted to be a very very flirty tone
they have had said 'what if we just stay in my hotel room together all day?'
101190864 (me)
21:07 - 22:07
Sometime after this, I was invited to Japan under the pretense that they had not many people for an event and they really really needed me
I later found out that this was completely false, they had more than enough people for the event
And I feel like they were just trying to guilt trip me to try to get me to show up
And thinking about it, I don't think I'm a very smart person
It felt uncomfortable but, I wanted to think the best and you know, if I was financially able - I probably would've went because I wanted to be a good coworker and a good friend and thinking about what could've happened
It's honestly something that I really don't want to think about, but I do a lot
sniffles
22:08 - 23:38
And to continue like, I am going to try and not share many details here - try to protect the identity of the other people who are involved but
this same exact behavior, this same offer to fly other people to Japan
if it meant they would stay in the same hotel room with him, it also happened
At another point, with another person (Femanon), 'they' (speculated: Aster) got extremely aggressive with this person (Femanon) for not wanting to meet up on him on the trip
I feel like this behavior to me was extremely uncomfortable and inappropriate especially given that we were coworkers and we had around a 10 year age gap between us
I think what may be seem like to be harmless flirting to them
felt very invasive and manipulative to me - the way that they would just completely ignore my boundaries and try to kind of blur the line between professional relationships and personal ones made me feel very pressured and just ultimately unsafe
101191157
23:39 - 23:47 = silence
23:48 - 24:12
I'm going to share a clip of a conversation that we had where I basically after finding out about what my friend said they went through, I basically had confronted them about it
Playing a clip
24:13 - 25:15
plays clips and the discussion is not a smooth as text, they talk over each other sometimes
Delulu: I feel like it's kind of weird to when you offer to fly girls out, just in general
potentially texting noises?
Delulu: I'm getting a call
Aster: In general?
Delulu: I might be famous... I don't know but don't you think...
Aster: But that-it was like a half joke.
Delulu: that's, I mean, you can't really half-joke saying 'I'mma fly you to Japan, come stay at my hotel, that's not really a joke.'
5 second pause
Delulu: like I feel like there are some things you should and should not say - to someone who is like, because like, she's (another femanon) a really big fan of Nijisanji.
Aster: Mhmm
Delulu: You're on your liver account, I feel like that's very awkward for her when you say that - even if it's a joke which I don't think it is - I don't think like, you say my jokes are going to (ensure??) or whatever - but you just don't say 'I'm going to fly you out and you're going to stay in my hotel room'
clip ends
101191501
25:16 - 26:16
After we had this specific conversation, we continued to go back and forth on it for a bit
and at one point, they had said something of the effect of 'well your friend is just so nice and I just really couldn't help myself, you know?'
And I just felt like that kind of hit home for me - I don't think that someone being nice to you is an excuse to push their boundaries or I don't want to say this lightly because I do believe my friend had it much worse than I did but -
I don't think being nice is an excuse to sexually harass someone
26:17 - 26:56
I think another thing many people have asked - why post it about it publicly so often?
and honestly it was because the only way I've had ever received any form of response from my job
every private attempt at communication was - it was met with silence or redirection
I remember at one point, recently actually, they were upset because I had stated (publicly) that I wanted to stream
and they said: "Why didn't you just ask?"
26:57 - 27:45
despite me and others pleading for months upon months for my return
the only reason any of this ever became public was because a friend chose to expose it
because, I can't really put it in any other way
I was stupid
I trusted them, I truly considered them a friend
but it came to a point in my relationship where I felt like I had to set boundaries in response to their very abusive behavior and they weren't happy with that
they kind of stated that this was a way to get back at me
101191858 (me)
27:46 - 28:15
Looking back, I feel like I realized how naïve I was to think that I could just handle it all on my own
but at the time, it felt like I had no one to turn to
my coworkers are already overwhelmed and were dealing with plenty of issues
and I didn't really want to bring in my issues into the mix and kind of just add more stress
28:16 - 28:50
I guess that was very stupid of me, I am not perfect and I've made so many mistakes but I truly don't think I've ever acted out of malice to hurt someone else
and it does hurt to be painted as something that I'm not
I only ever wanted to just do my work and take care of my fans and find a place where I can belong wholeheartedly without any fear or shame
28:51 - 30:17
I want to just take this moment, I want to sincerely apologize to my past, current, and future fans on things that were said
I've mentioned it on stream many times but I just want to say it again clearly
I truly truly do not care about money or expect anything from you
What I had said came from a moment of frustration during a very difficult time in my life
The financial stress and feeling unsafe in my work environment and just being constantly disrespected by outsiders of my own space just made things worse
I've been angry at anyone and angry at myself for not being able to do things for you
I wanted to be able to have fun events and do song covers and fun things for you guys and being unable to do it just hurt
I don't want it come off as an excuse, none of it justifies what I said and I take full responsibility for my words and I'm really am sorry if I hurt you in any way
101192130 (me)
30:18 - 31:37
I also want to clarify
The person mentioned in the video (likely referred to the leaked video), not a fan of mine, but someone who had been stalking me and harassing me and others for years
even after I have removed him from my community
he would continuously harass young women and Asian creators to -
I'm trying to think of not a weird way to word it but
I guess just to fulfill his own fantasies
that still doesn't excuse the way that I spoke or the people that I have hurt in the process
I let my anger and just not thinking get the best of me
and during that moment, I betrayed the trust and kindness of the people that genuinely supported me
And I'm truly sorry to those who believed in me, who waited for me, I'm so sorry - I know I let you down
I've made a lot of promises that I couldn't keep
that failure is just something that I don't think I can ever forget
101192317 (me)
31:38 - 32:31
you deserve someone better than me
I really did want to give you my all to be the best I could be for you but
in the end, I couldn't
and for that, from the bottom of my heart - I am so sorry, you really mean everything to me
I don't think I would even be here today if it wasn't for you
but, I think that covers everything that I wanted to talk about
I am sorry if this wasn't what you wanted to hear but, this is what I felt like that needed to be said
32:31 - 32:50 = silence
End of Video Transcription
End of Rentry Document
THESE ARE ALLEGATIONS AND NOT THE TRUTH
The last time rrats and allegations were spread around, many many people assumed it was the truth.
This is a he-said versus she-said matter and anyone assuming one is saying the complete truth or not, is a complete fool and their opinions should be discarded if they look at this rentry and assume it's all correct. THESE ARE ALLEGATIONS, FAGGOT.