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this fic contains depictions of self-hatred and self-harm (hitting), view at your own risk!!

Wandering Mind

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Wakko sat up in his hammock. It was the middle of the night. He couldn't sleep as usual, his damn insomnia prevented him from having that luxury.

As Wakko sat there, he let his mind wander. It was the only somewhat tolerable thing to do while up at godawful hours of the night.

He thought about how earlier that week, Yakko was eating cheez-its peacefully, and suddenly Dot started yelling at him, saying that she wanted the last of them. Yakko retorted with something about how he wanted the last of the ice cream, but Dot ate it. Dot said he didn't say anything, Yakko said she didn't say anything about the cheez-its, and they kept arguing about it.

As that happened, Wakko had been sitting in the kitchen looking for a snack himself, but he got sick of the bullshit his brother and sister were pulling. He started getting a headache and was overall annoyed by it, almost angry, so he went to bed despite it only being 6 pm at the time.

He realized his siblings didn't even come to check on him, even when they went to bed. Was he really that insignificant in this household? He pondered the question in dread. It sickened him to think he might've been unimportant to them.

Wakko even felt insignificant in his show's reboot. He didn't even get a full solo song. The only song that could've been considered his solo was barely over 45 seconds, and the guest children joined in towards the song. Not really a solo song, now is it?

Did the fans really like Yakko and Dot more? It sure seemed that way. The fans liked his brother and sister more. Yes, he wasn't as popular in the first series, but at least he got episodes where he was the main focus and full songs where he was soloing, despite not being as popular then. He even got a full movie dedicated to him, but he felt almost neglected in the reboot.

And him not being as popular as his brother shows in the fact that Yakko's Countries of the World song is multitudes more popular than Wakko's 50 States song. Wakko accidentally showed his frustration in the Gold Meddlers sketch and didn't realize it. He was embarrassed when he found out he was recorded while saying that.

But the episode had aired anyway. Yakko had tried talking to him about it, asking if he was alright, but Wakko turned down his concern. He insisted that he was fine, but he knew that Yakko knew he wasn't. Yakko was too smart not to realize his little brother, whom he'd lived with for a whole lifetime, was not alright. It made Wakko feel horrible. He was too emotional for his sibs.

He's the emotional one. He cried once over not understanding simple sarcasm while hanging out with Dot. She joked that Wakko had broken something of hers and that he then had to pay for it. He was confused, he didn't know he'd broken it. He started sobbing while apologizing profusely, and only then did Dot reveal it was a "silly" joke, and that he didn't actually break anything. That pissed off Wakko. He argued saying he didn't know, and a whole non-physical fight broke out between the two. It got so intense that Yakko had to put it to a halt and scold them for arguing like that. What pissed off Wakko even more was that he apologized in the end.

And that's what made him realize why he was so distant from his sibs now. They didn't understand him enough. At least not as much as they thought they did. But he couldn't just bring it up to them; they'd think he was "attacking" them. But then again, he could just be overthinking it. They wouldn't be mad, right? Surely they wouldn't be, they're his sibs! But then again, Dot got mad at him for not understanding a stupid, fucking joke.

Why couldn't he understand anything? Was he dumb? Stupid? No wonder his sibs were tired of him. He was stupid. He was even tired of himself because of this. Why couldn't he do anything right? Why was he like this? Why, why, why, why?!

It didn't register in his mind that he was hitting himself on the forehead with the palm of his hand. It seemed to be loud enough to wake up Yakko somehow because he was standing next to Wakko's hammock, even though the hitting was relatively quiet. Wakko froze once he realized his brother was right there.

"Hey, are you okay? Why are you hitting yourself?" Yakko asked in a worried tone.

Wakko stayed silent, attempting to think of some reasonable excuse. Yakko sat on the hammock after a few seconds and hugged his brother tightly but also gently.

"You can talk to me," Yakko told him in a quiet voice. He let go of the hug and faced Wakko. "You do know that, right?"

Wakko almost wanted to just nod or say "yeah," but after a moment of consideration, he figured that now was the best time to talk to him and let everything out.

"No," he said firmly.

"What?" A confusion-filled worry appeared on Yakko's face.

"No!" Wakko whisper-shouted so as to not wake up his sister. "I don't feel like I can talk to you! You always argue with Dot over stuff that's not important!" He wanted to swear but knew Yakko wouldn't take too kindly to it.

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Pub: 16 Sep 2022 11:45 UTC
Edit: 16 Sep 2022 18:15 UTC
Views: 55