20) Chapter 4. My Popularity!? (5)
The first thing I heard as soon as I got to school was praise about my looks.
Soi’s friends surrounded us, saying the uniform suited me well, showering me with compliments.
I know I’m pretty, and I know that as long as I wear the basics properly, most clothes look good on me. But hearing it from someone else’s mouth is a different story.
Besides, compliments make me uncomfortable.
In my previous life, back in middle school—
There was a time in first year when I got a perfect score on an English test.
The test was easy. Only very basic things came out.
But that was the start of the problem. The kids around me, even the teacher, thought I was amazing.
To be honest, I also thought I was skilled.
The teacher made me stand in front of the class and praised me enthusiastically, and the way my classmates looked at me changed a little.
But that was it. From the next test onward, my scores tanked.
The basics were things I had learned at an academy back in elementary school, and the test questions just happened to overlap with what I already knew. Everything after that was new material I had to memorize from scratch.
If only I had done poorly from the start. If I had never received any praise. If I had just stayed around average like everyone else.
Then no one would have brought up that one good score every time I made a small mistake later, and I wouldn’t have had to see my parents’ disappointed faces.
I already looked like an easy target, but maybe that made me look even easier, and the kids who liked to pick on others found a reason to bother me.
“Look at her blushing.”
“Don’t be Soi’s sister. Want to be mine instead?”
The girls saying that were all wearing uniforms that clung tightly to their bodies, just like me and Soi.
It’s not fair to judge people by appearances alone, but… well…
Let’s just say I have some bad memories.
“Who said you could take my sister? Beat me first.”
At Soi’s words, the girls burst into laughter.
“Rua, don’t worry. I’ll protect you so no one kidnaps you.”
“Uh, o-okay…”
Soi casually draped her arm over my shoulder. There was a desk between us, so her posture ended up incredibly awkward.
…Isn’t that angle a little dangerous…? Maybe she’s not used to wearing such a short skirt?
I was about to point it out, but no one else seemed to care, so I decided to stay quiet.
“If anyone needs protecting, Rua would do it. She’s the talented one.”
“Yeah. Rua’s already awakened, after all.”
They weren’t being sarcastic. It was genuine praise.
They’d never seen me use my power.
Soi didn’t care much about not having awakened her ability yet, and she didn’t doubt she eventually would. The other girls were the same.
Meanwhile, I was the only one worrying—wondering if they were thinking too much about me awakening first, or if they were judging me.
“Then try taking her. I’ll call my mom right away.”
“Ugh, that’s cheating.”
“Calling your parents into a kids’ fight is against the rules!”
More laughter.
Everyone seemed to be enjoying the atmosphere.
I felt like I was the only one who couldn’t adapt, and it made me feel a little pathetic.
- *
“…Hmm.”
Lately, Soi had been a bit cautious when dealing with Rua.
Just a few years ago, she used to cling to Rua constantly, hugging her whenever she felt like it.
But ever since Rua entered middle school, she seemed… drained somehow.
No, thinking back, the signs were there even earlier. As the time for her to enter middle school approached, Rua became quieter and spoke less and less.
Maybe that incident in fourth grade became a trauma for her.
…
Rua still goes to counseling these days.
Soi often accompanied her. Like today.
Of course, the content of the sessions was between Rua and the doctor, so Soi never heard any of it.
And since it might be trauma-related, she couldn’t just casually ask.
“…Hmmmm.”
“…What?”
When Soi made another nasal sound, a slightly sharp voice answered.
She turned her head, and there it was—bright pink hair that stood out no matter what.
Soi and Chae‑yi sat on opposite sides of the hallway, with the consultation room door between them.
“No, it’s nothing.”
Logically, none of this was Chae‑yi’s fault.
It was the criminal’s fault.
If the villain hadn’t been there, there would’ve been no reason for anything to go wrong while she was talking to Chae‑yi.
Even back then, she never blamed Chae‑yi.
“…Can’t I come along?”
A slightly timid, somewhat deflated voice. But Chae‑yi never backed down when talking to Soi.
They said they were childhood friends.
If it was from kindergarten, even Soi barely remembered. She had been with Rua ever since then, and in terms of time spent together, Soi had known Rua far longer than Chae‑yi had.
So it wasn’t like Chae‑yi’s presence weakened the bond between Soi and Rua.
It didn’t—but…
For some reason, Rua seemed awkward talking to Soi these days. Just last year, she would stutter but still initiate conversations. But now, a month into middle school, especially at school, she wouldn’t speak unless Soi spoke first. At home she was a bit better, but still.
And yet, Rua was one of the few people who would speak to Chae‑yi at school.
When they met in the hallway, Rua would greet her first. Sometimes she’d give a shy smile and wave a little.
There were a few others too—classmates she exchanged greetings with or had short conversations with.
But those kids never talked to Soi. When she tried to approach them, they panicked, backed away, or broke into a cold sweat.
Soi had no trouble making friends, so she thought it’d be nice if they all became friends.
But Rua never approached Soi’s friends first.
“…Can’t I come along?”
“…No.”
When Soi didn’t answer, Chae‑yi asked again, her voice small and timid.
A tone that sounded strangely familiar—
“Ah!?”
Soi shot up from her seat.
“Huh?”
Chae‑yi blinked in surprise.
“That tone.”
“Uh, um?”
“That tone—are you copying Rua?”
It was unmistakable. She heard that tone every day. There was no way she wouldn’t recognize it.
Except there was one difference: Rua was genuinely timid and swallowed half her words, while Chae‑yi only pretended to be timid and never lost a single argument.
“….”
Chae‑yi’s mouth fell open slightly.
Then her face turned bright red.
“N-no, I’m not.”
Soi felt like she had uncovered a secret. She was certain this was one of Chae‑yi’s strategies.
How sneaky.
She felt tricked, or defeated somehow.
They had known each other for so long, and they were even sharing a room now. Yet Chae‑yi figured out the tone that made Rua talk more easily before Soi did.
Even worse, even if Soi knew the trick now, she could never imitate that tone herself. It felt like losing.
Even though Chae‑yi hadn’t actually tricked her or challenged her to anything.
What was this? Why did she feel so annoyed?
Startled by the unfamiliar emotion, Soi blinked.
“….”
She wanted to argue, but there was nothing to argue about, so she sat back down.
Chae‑yi, embarrassed, didn’t push the topic either.
The hallway grew quiet again. Maybe Rua was the only patient today.
Rua, who had been with her since childhood.
Rua, who went everywhere with her and did everything she asked.
Rua, who tolerated even the most unreasonable demands without complaint.
Rua, who risked her life to protect her little sister, and stayed behind alone to save someone who couldn’t do anything.
And now, just because she talked a little more naturally to someone else, Soi felt… jealous?
“Haa…”
She let out a small sigh.
There were so many things she wanted to do for Rua. Just watching her made ideas pop into her head.
But whenever she did something, it always ended up being for her own satisfaction.
Even though the session was almost over, time felt unbearably slow to Soi.
- *
Okay. Good.
Still, I can’t give up on making friends. I can’t repeat my school life from my previous life.
No—at this rate, it might end up worse than my previous life.
At least back then, I managed to make a few friends I could joke around with.
There’s no way I can make Soi’s friends into my friends. So I should find some easygoing kids and make them acquaintances.
Soi wouldn’t object to me making friends.
And the doctor said it too.
It’s good to have someone you can open up to.
Of course, I’ll never open up more to them than to Soi, Auntie Yujin, or Uncle Dohyun, but still.
“H-hi.”
There were some kids I talked to briefly at the start of the semester.
Before the first month ends, there’s that soft period where the popular kids and the quiet kids still mix together, before everyone settles into their groups.
During that time, I happened to talk to a few kids who felt like “my kind.”
Obviously not boys. Even though talking to boys would be easier for me personality-wise, I already lived through my previous life and knew exactly what kind of disaster that would bring.
So I gathered my courage and approached them—
“Uh, um?”
The girl turned pale.
So did the friend she had just been laughing with.
The two of them—plain-looking, wearing loose uniforms, with big glasses—looked at me like some natural disaster had just spoken to them.
“Um, I…”
“S-sorry!”
“Huh?”
Before I could say anything, the girl apologized first.
“Um, if we did something wrong…”
“Y-yeah. We’ll stay quiet.”
No.
Wait.
What?
“….”
This is unfair.
I really just wanted to talk.
Yes, I approached them because they seemed easy to talk to, but—
I wasn’t trying to threaten them!
And yet—
“…No, I was just saying hi.”
“Uh, o-okay.”
“H-hi…”
They looked relieved but still terrified, watching me like I might explode at any moment. Embarrassed, I turned away.
And made eye contact with Soi.
Blink, blink.
She stared at me with a slightly puzzled expression as I walked back to my seat.
Then I stared blankly at the ceiling.
I mean…
I thought that by the time I got to the Academy, I’d be surrounded by friends and super popular.
But at this rate, who am I even supposed to talk to?
It feels hopeless.
Not like my life is ruined or anything, but emotionally, it feels hopeless!
If I’m this much of a coward, what happens to my popularity!? Who’s going to cover for me when I do something embarrassing later!?
What if I really can’t make any friends?