Ross Tries To Sleep

I couldn't sleep.

It wasn't an unfamiliar feeling to me - even before all this happened to me I'd struggled with sleep at the best of times. Back home I'd tried everything I could think of - medication, meditation, music - but nothing ever helped. It was like I couldn't sleep until my body decided it was ready to rest, regardless of how tired I felt.

The bed I was sleeping could hardly be called a bed in all honesty - it was just a pile of hay set up on the floor. Saying it was uncomfortable is probably the nicest thing I could say about it. I'd tried countless positions in my struggle for slumber - sleeping on my back like I used to was out of the question. It's hard to get comfortable when you have a paint brush sticking out of your backside. Sleeping on my side was more comfortable, but didn't help. I even tried curling up like a dog which didn't accomplish anything apart from making me feel embarrassed.

I laid in bed with my eyes shut for what felt like hours, until eventually the soft rays of the sun began to dance through the small window and cover my face, a beaming bell heralding the beginning of another long, restless day.

I grumbled to myself and hoisted myself out of my bed. Conjuring what little energy I had, I shambled from my room towards the bathroom. I knew it was going to be a fruitless endeavour, but I hoped that splashing some water on my face would help energise me, if only a little.

Entering the bathroom, I trudged over to the sink and ran some water, before scooping a handful up and splashing it over my face. To my surprise I actually felt a bit more alert after that, but not enough to be considered energised. I took a second to look at my reflection in the basin below me.

Yep, still doesn't look like me.

I could feel myself start to spiral as I looked down, wondering if the face I saw looking back up at me would ever feel like my own. Or if I'd ever see my normal face again.

I slapped my face a couple of times and shook the excess water out, and tried to calm myself down. Lingering on thoughts like that wouldn't help. I decided to go grab something to eat instead, reasoning that I could probably distract myself with calories long enough for something to happen.


As I slowly shuffled into the mess hall, I noticed that the place was empty aside from what looked like a mixture of a walnut and a chipmunk, and a blue axolotl-looking thing sitting at one of the smaller tables together. I didn't want to disturb them, so after grabbing an apple from the kitchen I sat down at a different table and began to snack.

crunch

The apples here were a far cry from anything I'd like to be eating just now, but I can't deny they're good. The taste is unique - it's almost like when I bite into one my brain's filled with the word "apple". They don't taste exactly like apples from back home but at the same time they're undeniably apples. They're very filling as well, much more than a regular apple.

As I enjoyed my snack and pondered the concept of apples, a voice cut through the air.

"Wow, you look like shit."

I groggily looked up to see where it'd come from, and found standing in front of me a white fox wearing a paperboy outfit, standing next to what was almost a pangolin that had a little red robin perched on its shoulder.

The sight of the fox got me thinking. Why was this one wearing clothes? Are we supposed to be wearing clothes here? All the other pokemon I've seen were either naked or just wearing accessories like scarves. Did I get recruited by some sort of weird nudist group? No, that can't be it - the other pokemon I've seen around Capim Town weren't clothed either. Is the entire town a nudist colony??

I was snapped out of my train of thought by the pangolin hitting the fox over the head and chiding it. "Don't be mean, Kiyo!"

The fox shot the pangolin a mean look, before snarkily replying, "I'm not being mean, Cassie, I'm merely stating a fact!"

I waved a hand over in their direction, and mumbled, "No, it's fine, don't worry. I just couldn't sleep is all."

The robin fluttered over to the pangolin's ear and whispered something, although I couldn't make out what it had said. The pangolin clapped its hands together and cooed, "That's a great idea, Bean! You should try a sleep seed!"

"A what?" I questioned, barely managing to stifle a yawn.

"A sleep seed!" replied the pangolin. "Eat one of those and it'll knock you right out! We use them all the time when we're r-" The pangolin was cut off by the fox, who had stood on its legs and covered the pangolin's mouth.

"WHEN we're struggling to sleep ourselves, hahaha!" the fox laughed, trying to play it cool, before starting to push its companions away and continuing, "We should get going now, got a lot to get done today. Hope your sleep thing works out!"

I barely managed to get out a "Thank you!" before the three were out of the room. They'd given me a lot to think about though. Sleeping pills never worked for me before, but a lot has changed since then. Maybe these sleep seeds they were talking about might do the trick.

I pulled myself off of the stool I was sitting on, and began to wearily march toward the guildhall's storeroom, finishing my apple on the way.


Dragging myself into the guild's storeroom, I couldn't help but note how messy it was. I'd guess about 35-40% of the place was organized, but the remainder was a veritable cornucopia of bullshit strewn all over the room. There were unmarked bags everywhere, as well as a plush with a very suspicious tear on the bottom.

Turning my attention away from the plush, I noticed that I wasn't alone in the room. Someone had their back to me, currently in the process of rifling through a box and placing its contents on different parts of the shelf. I couldn't even begin to describe what I was looking at - it looked almost like an egg had sprouted legs, wings and a neck. I couldn't make sense of what or how it was organising either - everything it placed down just looked like a blue ball to me, but I could definitely tell it had some purpose in the way it was sorting them.

I figured that if anyone could help me find a sleep seed in this mess, it would be the thing trying to organise it. I cleared my throat and asked, "Hey, do you know where the uhh, sleep seeds are?"

"O-oh, they're in that b-box over t-there..." trailed a voice from the creature in front of me. It waved one of its arms toward another shelf, continuing to focus on the balls it was organising.

I trudged over to the shelf that was pointed out, and had a look. The shelf was lined with boxes all labelled with different named seeds. Handy, because the contents of all the boxes looked near identical to me. Most of the named seeds were easy enough to figure out - I assume an "Energy Seed" would give you energy, and a "Blast Seed" is somehow volatile - but a lot of these made no sense. What's the purpose of a "Vile Seed"? And what's a "Doom Seed" supposed to do anyway?

I found the box I was looking for - it was right next to two boxes labelled "Reviver Seed", although the label on one of the boxes had been scribbled out, and someone had written "Reviver Seeds : )" on it. I poked around in the box labelled "Sleep Seed" and picked one out at random.

I turned to leave the room, saying "Thanks for the help! And uh, keep up the good work." As I began to step outside, I heard the creature's voice call back from the room. "YOU!"

I spun back around to see the creature staring me down, a furious look in its eyes. What had I done this time??

"You're the one that's been leaving those green trails everywhere in the guild hall! Is it supposed to be some modernist art demonstration or something? Modern artists are such god-damn hacks. Yeah wow, you took a banana and stuck a nail in it and it's a COMMENTARY on SOCIETY and you're SO SMART and DEEP and TALENTED for DOING THAT!"

The creature continued to rant for some time, but my fatigued brain was barely able to keep track with the impassioned speech. After hearing the phrase "art-deco bullshit", I'd decided I'd had enough, and waved my free hand in surrender.

"Listen, I'm sorry... I'm so sleep-deprived right now, and I keep forgetting I have a tail that trails behind me everywhere. I'll try harder in the future to not leave a mess behind me."

I turned around to leave, but before I could take a single step I felt something pull my tail, and I let out a yelp. Before I could turn around to see what happened, I felt something fasten around my waist, and I looked down.

It was an extremely fucking ugly fanny pack, adorned with the same little green badge I'd seen the other guild members wearing.

Extremely confused, I looked back around to see the creature tucking my tail into the fanny pack's loop. "T-that should h-help.", it stuttered. "P-please take i-it. It's a g-gift."

I looked at the creature's face again. The fury it had before was gone, replaced by a small smirk. I got the impression that it was trying to punt something it didn't want on me, but I didn't care. It felt a little uncomfortable having my tail tucked in like that, but I could deal with a little discomfort if it meant I wasn't dragging paint behind me everywhere. Plus, fanny packs are really practical. Not only does it give me something to carry stuff in, it means my hands are free because I'm not having to carry my tail any more.

I took a second to re-adjust the pack, before addressing the creature in front of me. "I think I can work with this! It's super practical!"

I extended my hand out for a fist bump. "What's your name, anyway? I'm Ross."

The creature grabbed my fist and shook it up and down. "C-call me T-togetic..."

I was caught off guard by the handshake conversion maneuver, but it was close enough. "Nice to meet you. And thanks again for your help!" I said, before heading out of the storeroom. I heard a faint "Y-you too..." from behind me as I left.


It had only been a short amount of time, but with how tired I was it felt like I hadn't been back to my room in hours. I shambled into my room, only to notice that something was different. There was a bundle of cotton laid out on top of the hay pile that wasn't there before, as well as a piece of paper next to it. I walked over and picked up the paper. Someone had left me a note.

"Heard you were having trouble sleeping - this should help! -Team Cozy"

"Team Cozy?" I said to myself. Must be some of the other people living here. After reading the note, my attention turned back to the cotton that was laid out. This would easily make the pile of hay more comfortable to sleep on. Hopefully with this and the sleep seed I'd procured I could finally get some well needed rest.

I trudged over to the hay pile, and spread out the cotton over it, doing what I could to make a makeshift bed. I laid back on the pile slowly, testing it for comfort. I could feel my body relax instantly as I got comfortable. This was so much better than the pile I'd been sleeping on. Why wasn't this standard??

I looked over the Sleep Seed I'd picked up earlier. The pangolin I'd seen earlier - Cassie I think she was called - said you just had to eat it and it'd work. A tiny twinge of doubt welled up inside me, but I quickly brushed it off and swallowed the seed before I started to double guess myself. A seed being able to put you to sleep makes more sense than say, getting smarter and stronger by eating sweets.

I shuffled back into the cotton pile, and eagerly waited for the seed's effect to kick in.

...

...

...

It didn't work.

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Pub: 02 May 2023 01:17 UTC
Views: 429