ill bring back my diary when im on my feet again,,, just.. give me time
hey guys, uhm i dont think anyone reads these so i dont think theres a point in bringing back the old format, so ill just keep this messy one. kk awesome!
wonderful day!! awesome!! so great!! what did i do today you might be asking? nothing! i cried for a good 2-3 hours! my irls hate me though so thats super awesomee! someone in my family died aswell today, so thats fun. didnt know them, dont really care. more so worried about the outcome. i keep bubbling up all these things and im so tired. my best friends been missing! for days! i dont know if hes alive and despite my efforts to find out ive gotten no where! i still have no idea where andrew is, which is also another concern in the back of my head. im worried about nikk and andrew but i dont think theres anything i can do. i cant FIX anything and its driving me crazy. back to my irls, i told my irls to LEAVE IT ALONE! to leave the situstion alone and they didnt and now i might have to go to court! i fucking told you to drop it!!! im failing school but i dont have any motivation to fix it, i dont see a point anymore. i dont see the point in any of this. half my friends hate me and the other halfs M.I.A.
theres so many other things and i dont know how to make it better and i dont know what to do. i wish i could disappear aswell. i feel so bad for not being able to fix anything, i feel like i have to fix everything and i dont know how. i want things to be normal, i want nikk back and i want everything to be ok. i feel like im trapped and i dont know how to get out. AWESOME!!!
hi its hhmm monday now, hello.. everything is the same but i am home so thats cool! uhmm now i rlly dont have much to say, idk anymore
i have plans tmr, which is cool.. i have like 3 irl friends now,, which is also cool.. callums my goat, we have a DATE(yeah a romantic oke guys trust) but anyways that shld be funzies
everything is GREAT! I LOVE EVERYTHING! (im lying this is a lie) hi guys, what are we all doing. like what is the point of anyyy of thiss.. i hate ALMOST everyone and ALMOST everyone hates me. its funny because i used to love every single person i knew, now i just... i realized how little people care about,, anything,, anyone. love and care is such a rare thing to have. id like to say everything i had with people was love and people wanting to be by me. i dont think thats awfully true. i love some people... certain people... others who i wish i didnt, and others who greatly deserve it.
nikk is back and ALIVE! and well! so everythings better. i hve a littlr datey date at uhmm 2:40 so that will be fun.. it is planned out nicely so im excited. ive never been on a date b4, so uhh idk what people do on dates but i will find out. anyways im so glad nikk is back.. i told him abt all the stuff he missed, he says grey sucks we hate grey.
hi guyss!! i am uhh sitting down,, i went to many stores very fun! awesome date thingy,, well i guess you can call it a date, we arent like tg or anything. i was like "iv never been on a date before" and he was like "ok ill take u on one" and i said "ok" i did find out all my irl friends hate me besides callum and max, so thats super awesome. grey has been telling EVERYONE half truths the story, its been stressing me out, fuck you grey.
life update, i am VERY happy. nikk is back and hes ok and well and i said that already but im still happy abt it. i got all my irls to listen 2 my side of the story, i finally cleared up allnthe BULLSHIT grey said. i also rekindled with a old irl friend bevause of grey, so haha grey fuck u. grey has never been a good friend2 me or anyone else. im really happy other people understand where im coming from, i have constantly defended her for years and she has constantly treated me like shit. she likes to vicitmize herself, she is NOT COOL! she started throwing everyone under the bus because i said MY SIDE of the story, and she said they all sucked. (all my friends took her side and defended her for days, yet she threw them under the bus.) i tried so hard to be nice but she has done so much i dont even find her redeemable. she hs put me in such a mentally unwell place so many times. not just me but other people aswell. she also has it out for angie? who turned 15 YESTERDAY. angie is a child, grey is 16-17,, so odd bro
hi guys i have more 2say, uhmm what was i gonna say.. i dont like my hair, it makes me feel BAD. i cant style it right so i just kinda look bad,, i get so angry like alll the time over it,, very embarassinf. earlier i soent like 20 minutes trying to make it look good and it didnt work so i gave up. i have this new program in school 2 make things easier for me so im glad. (it wont change my work, just help me out a bit) maybe that makes me dumb.. idk.. im bad with turning stuff in on time cuz i get stressed, plus its a bit difficult with my,, mental. issuses. my english teacher and me meet every week and jst talk normally so shes super nice and she knows me pretty well, she helped me get into the program which is super sweet. i have a planner now so i can stay focused better cuz i really wanna do good in school. i have a doctors appoitment tmr and im NOT excited, I HATE THE DOCTORS!!! ughhhhh whatever.. i also have to meet with a old friend tmr to discuss some stuff so hopefullt that goes ok. i am trying to push myself out more so im not so.. depressed and closed off. i think its working? im happy, i mean i thtink im happy. all my issuses mostly got fixed today and im happy about it. i am a bit worried about some things but itll be ok inthink.
my little meet wit my old friend went super well,, i think we are gonna start hanging out more! shes super cool. awesome speaking skills guys
im getting all my shit together, it feels nice..
i yearn. i yearn for you. AHHHHHHHH SHOOT ME BOW
i am planning out hiw to use and spend my moneu.. i have to set aside like 160 for figure preorders but the rest is freeballing. im gonna save 4a pc.. WOO! me and nikk saved rhe world
heyyy guys, i feel very sad, and also very not sad. sad about certain things and people BUT ALSO HEY I FIGURED OUT MY LORE I WANYED2! i spent like hours deep diving into this like roblox myth girl back from 2016-2018. i went through her youtube video and got into contact wit someone mentioned in it. myth girls a little pedophile freak.. shoutout ken (same name as me) for telling me all the stuff i wanted2know. the whole things so.. yikes..
anyways uhhh.. theres some stuff i wanna say but im not sure who reads this and i dont really want certain people reading what i wanna say. rip.
me and nikk hate everyone
hey guysss.. i have this fear about growing up. its weird because im so scared of like, growing up alone in a small apartment by myself. i dont WANT to be alone. im so scared im gonna amount to nothing.
how to move on.
(somebody tell me)
next month lawl feb