" BECAUSE THE BLOOD THAT WAS SPILLED CAN NEVER BE UNDONE — "
" I'D BE LYING IF I SAID THAT I DIDN'T HAVE FUN "
Boundaries
Hey, so uhm, this is going to be a little more personal than the others, so I'm writing more as a note to the viewer rather than something presentable, I hope you don't mind too much !
So uhm, with that said, despite the demeanor that I normally have, (ie; seeming to not care about anything, saying anything and everything that comes to my mind, being very open with just about everything, making sex and murder jokes, etcetera) I actually do have boundaries of my own and it would be really nice if they were respected... y'know ?
Now, about said boundaries, most of them are related to past traumas, for example, please don't mention the name "Sammy" around me, please don't show me pics or videos of someone self harming or committing suicide, please never mention heavy romance around me it gets uncomfortable for a lot of personal reasons, and please don't yell and scream, I don't do well with loud sounds.
on top of all that, I should also explain a few things about myself, I usually present as though i don't care about anything, to my own detriment sometimes, but there is a reason for that, I am hyperempathic, which basically boils down to this, when I'm talking to people, I feel everything that person is feeling like a sort of emotional mirror and when there's a lot of excess emotions for me to process i struggle to handle it and get irritated, have mood swings, and am overall really not great to be around, but I've found that if i can convince myself i don't care, it helps with handling everything, so when i say i don't care, I'm mostly saying it to convince myself, not because I'm being rude.
so uhm, besides that, I have major trust issues due to my previous trauma so i get pretty suspicious of people at first, I also have ADHD, and I struggle with keeping thoughts to myself, so i usually end up making jokes or saying things that not everyone is a fan of, which i won't make excuses for, I'm trying my best to not do that.
Alright ! I think that's everything, thanks for taking time out of your day to read this . - Caelan <3