Alchemical Creations: Fireworks
“Sing, O infernal muse, and tell me what I should do next?”
The flame I hold out in the palm of my hand, unsurprisingly, refuses to answer, merely dancing around and flickering light. What a strange thing, I think, well, no stranger that I was transmuted into a so-called Hisuian Typhlosion, but I digress.
I intently study the flame I am able to conjure out of thin air, a red and purple spectre that, while it produced heat, made no smoke. Good thing too, since I would’ve suffocated in this workshop long ago.
I snuff the flame and turn back to the workshop bench. Everything I had is laid out… blast seed extract, ground into powder, highly volatile, especially considering how hot the workshop had become with all the flames I’m using. Next to that is a hollowed-out pile of wood.
I sigh, then resummon my flame. Talking to it was better than talking to myself, even if it was practically the same thing.
“Are you of the opinion, O most esoteric flame, that I should proceed with this creation?”
The flame glows brightly.
“Ah! You believe it shall garner me goodwill with the Guild?”
The flame once again flickers.
“So be it!” I declare to really only myself, carefully putting the blast seed powder into jars, then in turn putting those into a bag I treated with phosphorus so as not to ignite. Something I learned a lesson quickly when my first bag burst into flames. I gather the bundle of wood in my arms then exit the workshop.
The clearing dotted with ruins is, thankfully, empty. While it’d be nice to talk to someone beside myself, I think, it’d be best to ensure my reputation as an alchemist can supersede that of… other false reputations, and that can be achieved by proving my alchemical worth!
“Right, little flame?” I ask the resummoned fire whose familiar heat is now my only constant companion.
“Well, besides sleep-aid,” I tell it, “I’ve been trying to avoid Enny since that embarrassment. I know that his teammate thinks the worst of me now, and as for he, I’ve no idea.”
A flicker.
“And that attempt at Seviper antivenom too; I’m sure there was a better way to ask Serps to take his venom into the spherical containers aside from ‘might I put these balls in your jaw?’”
The fire turns somewhat dimmer.
“And let’s not forget that time at the very beginning, when I first arrived in the Guild and I asked announced to everyone in the mess hall, ‘I’d like for everyone to come in to provide a DNA sample;’ not only is that the last time I assume everyone be aware of the workshop, how could I have possibly known practically everyone was familiar with what type of Pokemon they had been transmuted into?”
Brighter again.
“Oh and the other failed experiment with-”
I dismiss the flame when I realize what I was doing. I really ran into these innuendos all too much; that paper from the rift really only made things worse once. No longer, I think, now that I shall create something whose purpose cannot possibly be mistaken for perversion!
It takes some time to carefully remove the blast seed powder from the jars and put them into the hollowed wood, and then adjust them so they’d have the intended effect. But after about an hour of work, I had not only gotten these fireworks ready, but erected a dirt mound to shield me should any fireworks go off.
I check everything twice over before beginning. With my luck, how could I not? Mound? Solid. Fireworks? Removed from the launch site. Blast seed powder on me? Not an ounce!
I position the first firework properly and reignite the air around my paw. “If this works, flame, I won’t be needing to talk to you anymore.” I hold it underneath the ignition rod where it easily catches light, emitting a sizzle sound which was my signal to run back to the mound, which I take shelter in. Should my luck help it…
The sizzle turns into a loud whistle until it grows more and more distant until… POP!
I look up. There it is! A firework in the evening sky! Now I wish to see the whole thing, to see if I’ve actually done it.
I quickly grab another and, in my excitement, put it in my mouth and run on all fours back, setting it up. Upon igniting it as easily as the last, I return to the mound and pile of fireworks but, instead of taking cover, stand upright to watch the show.
The flame runs up the ignition rod until it enters the hallowed wood where the tail erupts in sparks and, with a whistle, shoots it upwards into the sky. After a pause, a brilliant trail of colors - the infused elements having done their work - tear across the sky.
I laugh heartily, and my flames shine brighter as I find myself filled with joy. I summon the flame into my palm yet again.
“Fuck you, little flame,” I say to it, pointing at it with my left hand, “I don’t need you anymore! Soon I’ll be able to adventure and not be an outcast forced to talk to a ghastly little fire. Begone from me!”
I throw it aside.
Ah, I think in what feels like slow-motion, this is where the functions of this body and its abilities elude me still. There goes the flame I thew, not dismissed as before, heading straight to the stockpile of the remaining dozen or so firework prototypes. Can I try to recall it? Yes! I do, and it dissipates, but of course not before it ignites a firework.
I quickly jump back into the mound that I had the foresight to build so that it would cover all four directions, not just the launch site, and hope that the whistle of the ignited rocket would fade away, indicating it escaped and did not remain in the pile of other explosives.
But alas, with my luck and sensitive ears, I can hear that the telltale whistle does not fade away, but instead remains put.
Oh fu-
I awake with a start. Was this… the Guild infirmary? It seemed someone must’ve seen me and brought me in. I look around. Though it appears to be night, even then the Guild is rarely this silent.
I get up and start to walk, not making a noise. Until, of course, I fall and knock over a tray and it clatters to the ground… silently. Instantly, I realize what has happened.
“No. Fucking. Way,” I say. Or, I think I say. I make my mouth move to say it, but I hear nothing. A tap on my shoulder startles me and I turn around where I look down at a… pink white Pokemon. I don’t know what the species name is, but I know the medic to be Kina, no thanks to that accident with the-
She moves her mouth. “I can’t hear,” I say. She gives me a concerned look and motions for me to kneel down. I oblige and she looks into my right ear, then my left, both of which are still extremely sensitive.
After a moment she reappears in front of me, then gives a sad nod. Well, blast it all.
My question of “for how long” is met with a shrug. All she does is pull out some white bandages and wraps it around both of my ears before pulling out a board, writing in English - not Anglish, these barbarians - you’re good to go. Keep your ears covered to heal.
“Thanks,” I think I say before I leave the medical room and beeline to the one place I know I won’t be bothered.
The bad news? I can’t hear anyone knock anymore. The good news? No one knocked in the first place. Plus, I think, it’s helping me rid myself of the habit of talking aloud to a flame like a madman. Well, why would I want to talk to that terrible little thing when it did this to me?
As I continue on my work, I suddenly hear, knock knock knock~
“I can hear!” I exclaim, but I do not hear myself say it. “What?” I say aloud, yet again hearing nothing.
Kyukyukyu~ Sorry about that Ikarus, I hear from within my own head as the door swings open, revealing a blue cat striped with white that I know to be the Guildmaster, Lliam, but when I heard of what happened to you, I knew I needed to come down and check up on you. And what better way to make an entrance?
“But… how can I-”
I can project thoughts. Too many things to explain, especially since you’re not at all familiar with Pokemon, yes?
I nod. “Well, how can I help you, Guildmaster?”
He strikes a pose which, were he from Terra, would almost immediately oust him as a homosexual. I wonder how much overlap there exists between Terra and Earth- NONE! Now, I know of your… reputation around here, so I figured I’d see how you’re doing and what you’ve made. It’d be nice to know the money I collect doesn’t go down the drain here, hehe~
We sit down and talk. I found it quite nice of him to both speak aloud and think, enabling me to practice lip-reading, something I realize will be essential for however long I am beset with deafness. I explain my creations - how their intention and use goes far beyond that which is sexual in nature, which the Guildmaster noticeably breathes easy at. I do believe he was just glad to not actually have a second Cyndaquil to deal with. When I bring up the fireworks, he becomes excited.
Oh, how fun! I’m sure we can use those to celebrate the New Years! Hopefully once everyone sees that, your woes will be over.
“I sure hope so. But they’re not quite done yet. I need to treat them with some distilled phosphorus to retard them to fire. They’re quite easily ignited so I’d like to avoid repeating the same mistake that-’
Oh, distilling phosphorus, you must be quite the alchemist~
At this I can’t help but blush, my flames glowing brighter. “Ah well, thank you. Besides, it’s thanks to your design that you put the alchemy workshop below the restrooms so that I-”
How do you distill phosphorus? Lliam asks.
I feel my heart drop. “Wh-what do you mean? Do you not know how it is done? Do you not know where phosphorus comes from?”
No, most of us didn’t come from a world where alchemy was practiced, but you’ve piqued my curiosity, Ikarus.
“I- I- I feel that it would be best for you - for all of us - if you retained the luxury of not knowing what I know.”
Now you’re concerning me Ikarus.
I just motion to the red curtain behind me with the alchemical symbol for phosphorus on it. “My phosphorus distillation bench is there, connected to the overhead pipes.”
Lliam saunters over and I could hear in my head as I watched him open the curtain.
Hehe I’m just joking Ikarus~ Whatever it is it can’t possibly be that ba-
He stands silently for a moment holding a hand to his mouth in contemplation, then turns around and says, “are you really telling me this is not a fetish? Is this really how phosphorus is made? From, he motions to the array of vials and tubes with yellow liquid running through them, this?
“Yes,” I squeak.
He must sense the truth despite the reputation that exceeds me and the horrors he just witnessed because he says, with sincerity, okay okay, I believe you, let’s just keep this under wraps for now… his voice trails off as he walks back to the door.
He turns around and puts on a happier face. Well Ikarus, just get to work on those fireworks for the New Year’s celebration! Aaaand don’t even mention phosphorus, for everyone’s sake, mkay~? Lliam says with a smile.
I let out a “sure” as Lliam leaves, closing the door behind him. It’s hopeless, I think, even the Guildmaster believes me to be a degenerate.
All I can do is bury my head into my paws and cry.