RENTRY/NOTHINGS-FAIR-IN-LOVE-AND-WAR
BEFORE YOU INTERACT !!

When you can't even say my name
Has the memory gone? Are you feeling numb?
I'm not good at holding conversations so it usually gets awkward for me when I talk to new people!! I am often quiet especially when I'm tired, overwhelmed or i'm not sure on what to say next in the conversation.
Another thing is that I hate messaging first as I always overthink that i'm just bothering someone with my constant messaging so I just go quiet until someone messages me.
I am usually seen by myself or with a friend or two, this is because I don't really enjoy talking in a large group of people, something about them makes me feel overwhelmed and uneasy so I tend to avoid them to the best to my ability. So I much prefer hanging out with atleast 1 person or 2 people to make me feel at ease.
I dislike talking about my issues and problems to other people, I feel like i'm oversharing and that i know i'll regret talking about it afterwards, I tend to bottle up my feelings until it gets worse, I am aware of this ongoing problem however i just hate expressing my problems. I also firmly believe that People are out to get me, which is why I do not like explaining any issues that I might have out of fear that people who share those messages with their friends.
I have reoccurring jealously issues and i tend to overthink things alot. i dislike it when I find out that I've gotten attached to someone as i feel like I'm going to be a total failure and mess everything up. I tend to self sabotage myself in various ways when i start to feel distant such as telling myself that i'm better off by myself, ignoring messages, push people away, etc. I also tend to stay away when my friends are talking to other people, this is out of fear that i'll get jealous and it'll resort to going back to self sabotaging myself all over again.
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