Attraction: a type of feeling that sparks interest in a particular individual. Among some individuals, it is useful to think of attraction in terms of particular types or categories. Other individuals do not find this helpful, and some do not experience attraction at all (known as anattractional). Using or applying one of these concepts does not necessarily imply using all of the others. The "main three" attractions are often considered to be sexual attraction, romantic attraction, and platonic attraction.
Aemotional : A term for someone who does not experience emotional attraction. This person may also be aromantic, nonalterous, and/or a(queer)platonic, or they could experience those types of attraction without an emotional component.
Aemotional Spectrum (aemo-spec) : a term for those who experience little, fluctuating, and/or atypical emotional attraction, or those who only experience certain types of emotional attraction. An aemo-spec individual would be on the aplatonic spectrum, the analterous spectrum, the aromantic spectrum, the aqueerplatonic spectrum, etc.
Aesthetic : An interest or strong appreciation for a particular person’s appearance or beauty. ; refers to the ability to admire someone’s appearance without the need or desire to have physical, sexual, or romantic contact with them. ; experiencing aesthetic attraction (admiration, valuing their existence more than others (non-obsessively), adoration, interest in their persona, distant emotional reliance)
Adornic : a type of alterous attraction based off of adoration for one or more others. This type of attraction can be described as administration for the other(s). It should feel warm and comfortable. Adornic attraction thrives off of happiness, two (or more) people in an adornic relationship should make eachother happy, laugh, and overall give them a warm feeling that is unlike that of romantic attraction.
Alimentary : a form a tertiary attraction for those who experience the desire to eat someone or something. This include : humans, non-humans animals, plants, objects, scenes, concepts etc. A possible term for an alimentary crush is “yum" or "yam”.
Alterfucked : a type of alterous/romantic/(queer)platonic attraction where you can't figure out what the fuck is actually going on but you don't really care as long as you have your partner with you!
Alternating : a form of attraction where someone's attraction type changes, for example one day someone might be romantically attracted to someone but the next day be platonically attracted to them. The type of attraction can change fluidly or it could "jump" between them without an in between. Alternating attraction can be a term used on its own or it can be combined with other orientations. For example, one could be homoalternating, which means that when they do experience alternating attraction, it is only towards the same gender.
Alterous : An interest or desire for emotional closeness without necessarily being platonic and/or romantic. Alterous is often used in the place of -romantic or -sexual suffixes (e.g., bialterous instead of biromantic). 1) A significant attraction that is related to other attractions (e.g., romantic) 2) A significant attraction that is unrelated to any other attraction ; desire for a type of emotional relationship and emotional closeness that the terms “platonic” or “romantic” don’t feel like they accurately characterize. It can also convey discomfort or de-identification with the word “romantic” as a primary descriptor or focal point for different types of attraction. ; desiring interaction that is neither 100% platonic or 100% romantic, but is rather somewhere in between (affectionate speech, physical affection, doing things together exclusively, valuing the relationship more than others) ; attraction and desire for an emotional closeness with a person that exists inbetween romantic and platonic feelings. A alterous "crush" is called a mesh.
Amari : In which you do not specify the kinds of attraction you have (romantic, sexual, etc.) either because you do not prioritize different types, see no distinction between them, or don’t see any form as more important than another. An unspecified form of attraction. It may be used as an identity, or as its own form of attraction, and can also be called “amari attraction” if the user wishes. Amari may be used alongside other forms of attraction. Amari may be considered its own form of attraction in which the user does not care about the kinds they’re experiencing, because it doesn’t matter to them. It is an unspecified form of attraction that can be different for different people. Amari “crushes” can be called a tresh, or rush. Users may partake in something like relationship anarchy, or be amatopunk. This identity could be considered an amatopunk or relationship anarchy oriented form of attraction in that it purposefully does not distinguish different forms of it. The suffix for amari is “-mari”, and can be used after any orientation prefix, like homomari, heteromari, bimari, and panmari. Amari is the general term for this identity. It is not restricted by any set rules (similar to queerplatonic) and no two amari relationships have to function in the same way.
Amarity/Amarous : Describes an aromantic person who wishes to form a significant partnership with others. The opposite of nonamorous (not everyone finds this category of description relevant).
Amical : Interchangeable with platonicity (sometimes refers to “best friends”); on a higher level of affinity than in just social/interpersonal circles (that are more impersonal). ; experiencing platonic + siblinghood attraction (nonsexual touch, valuing the relationship more than others, friendship, doing things together exclusively, emotional reliance, possible physical affection, familial bonds) ; also known as Platonicity is a form of tertiary attraction most often felt by a-spec individuals. It is similar to platonic, social and queerplatonic attraction. It can sometimes be referred to a "best friends" relationship, it can also be seen as a siblinghood type of relationship, though it does not have to be with one's actual siblings. It is on a higher level of affinity than in just normal friendships, which can be more impersonal. It typically involves nonsexual touching, valuing the relationship more than other relationships, doing things together exclusively, emotional reliance, physical affection, and familial bonds. Amical attraction can have a lot of overlap between platonic and queerplatonic attraction. For some people they may consider all these attractions to be the same type of attraction for them. A amical crush could potentially be called a shush or a thresh.
Amodian : attraction that is both romantic love and hate being tightly woven together.
Anemotional (see aemotional)
Anemotional Spectrum (see Aemotional spectrum)
Aparental : a form of attraction where one does not feel Parental Attraction towards any gender. They can still be romantically or sexually attracted to someone, but their attraction does not revolve around wanting to have or raise a child with someone.
Aphysical : A term for someone who does not experience physical attraction. This person may also be asexual, nonaesthetic, and/or asensual, or they could experience those types of attraction without a physical component.
Aphysical spectrum (aphys-spec) : a broader label that also encompasses those who experience atypical (fluctuating, very little, fluid, demi-/auto-/fray-/etc) physical attraction.
Aplatonic : Describes a person who experiences little to no platonic attraction. This means they rarely or never experience squishes, which are strong desires to form a friendship with a particular person.
Aplatonic Spectrum (aplspec) : 1) An umbrella term for people who experience little to no platonic attraction, abbreviated to aplspec. 2) Aplspec is also used as a specific identity describing someone who experiences conditional or otherwise non normative platonic attraction, but doesn’t label it further. Platonic is often used in the place of -romantic or -sexual suffixes (e.g., demiplatonic instead of demiromantic).
Artistic : attraction towards someone for their artistic talent ; attraction towards someone when they perform or make art in some way ; attraction that is only felt when performing or making art ; attraction tied to art
Ashen : an attraction founded on a desire to help two other individuals maintain a healthy relationship + prevent them from developing a toxic or otherwise unhealthy dynamic.
Atertiary : also known as nontertiary, is an identity defined by a complete lack of tertiary attraction. One who is atertiary would not experience any form of tertiary attraction, and would by default be nonamical, asocial, amental, nonparental, etc. ; Atertiary indiviuals may still engage in activities traditionally defined by tertiary attraction, such as having tertiary relationships. The opposite of atertiary is allotertiary, where one experiences all forms of tertiary attraction. The physical and emotional attraction counterparts are aphysical and aemotional.
Attachment : refers to a type of bond or connection that’s often necessary or present in committed or long-term relationships of any kind.
Attached (see following)
Attrachange : when an individual in a relationship's attraction changes to a different type of attraction randomly. However, they are still partners in a specific relationship, and still love each other with the same amount of love, it's only the type of attraction that changes. Only one individual in the relationship experiences the change, and it applies to any kind of relationship. It can also happen at any time for any reason, or even for no reason at all.
Attractionshift : describes an experience in which one feels a certain kind of attraction towards someone until they are in a relationship with said person. For example, an attractionshift person may feel romantic attraction towards somebody, but once they are in a relationship with this person (romantic or not), their form of attraction towards this person may change to queerplatonic attraction towards this person. This may or may not change the kind of relationship they have with the other person.
Aural : also known as vocal attraction, is a type of sensual/sensorial attraction where one is attracted to someone else's voice. Someone feeling aural attraction would like and possibly feel drawn to things like singing, a radio voice, or the sound of someone talking.
Auspisic (see Ashen)
Autiattractional : 1) An orientation in which a person on the autism spectrum cannot tell the difference between different types of attraction due to being autistic and/or 2) An orientation in which a person on the autism spectrum is unable to understand and/or relate to the neurotypical concept of attraction, sexuality and/or orientation and/or 3) An orientation which can only be understood in the context of being autistic ; autattractional may reflect a person's feeling towards a specific type of attraction (e.g. sensual) or their feelings towards attraction, sexuality and/or orientation as a whole. It is exclusive to autistic people. (Directly quoted from @ten-clowning-street 's post)
Beyorientations (See Allion)
Bonding (see Potential)
Cedural : Also known as “submissive attraction.” A desire to be protected, covered, understood, tutored, and supported by someone. Not to be confused as kink-related or sexual in nature. ; also known as Dependent Attraction or Submissive Attraction, is a form of tertiary attraction that revolves around wanting to feel protected, covered, understood, tutored, and supported by someone else. It is the reverse of tutelary attraction. With cedural attraction one feels weak and vulnerable, the possibility that someone might protect them makes one feel an attraction towards that person. It is also based on a feeling of feeling needed or necessary. A relationship between protective and protected person can be labeled as guardianship, wardship, or tutelage. A person in that relationship who takes on the protected role could be called a concomitant or guide partner. A cedural crush could be possibly be called a gush or sush. This relationship should not be associated with DPD (dependent personality), protectors in systems, or with BDSM and kink related power play sometimes seen in sexual/romantic relationships. The DPD version of this is dependplatonic. The system version is sysplatonic.
Considatore : A type of attraction caused by someone being respectful/supportive of your queer identity. That someone can be cishet, or they can be queer too. (Exclusive to queer people.)
Cute : a form of tertiary attraction where one finds another individual particularly cute. Usually cuteness is found in childish individuals or those with young traits. It’s the same feeling most have when playing with or looking at a puppy or a kitty. This type of attraction can be physical or emotional. An example of physical cute attraction is finding the appearance or clothing specially cute. An example of emotional cute attraction is finding a set of behaviours or personality traits particularly cute. (Cute attraction differs from aesthetic attraction because the individual is not necessarily visually pleasing or beautiful, and one can find another individual cute and ugly (or just not beautiful) at the same time. Another difference is that aesthetic attraction is physical, while cute attraction can also be emotional.)
Deistic : a form of subjective attraction in which a human or humanoid who is related to a deity in some way - whether through a system in which the two are headmates, an OC, or another form - is attracted to the deity. This can be paired with another form of attraction, ex. "I feel deistic romantic attraction to my deity OC." Deistic attraction is exclusive to those who are humans or humanoids, however if they are involved in a relationship with the deity, the deity could say, "I am in a deistic relationship," or "I am in a subjective relationship." 'Deistic' comes from the word 'deism,' which is the "belief in the existence of a supreme being, specifically of a creator who does not intervene in the universe.”
Dependattraction or Deattraction : a form of attraction for those with DPD. This can be used to describe any kind of attraction felt solely within the context of dependent personality disorder experiences. This is only to be used by people with DPD and is exclusive to them.
Dependplatonic : also known as deplatonic, is a form of platonic attraction that only occurs within one’s depended(s). Can be used to describe any kind of attraction felt solely within the context of Dependent Personality Disorder. It is exclusive to people with DPD. The non-DPD version of this is cedural attraction. The system version is sysplatonic.
Dependent (see Cedural)
Diauamoric : a type of attraction characterized by an overwhelming feeling of devotion towards an individual, often described as similar to worship. One may usually make collections of objects they feel describe the individual, or may feel like places that the person lives or where they can see the individual are similar to a church. One feeling Diauamoric Attraction often thinks highly of the other individual.
Divine : another form of subjective attraction in which a deity is attracted to a humanoid, and vice versa. This can be paired with another form of attraction, ex. "I feel divine sensual attraction to my humanoid headmate." Divine attraction is exclusive to deities and humanoids.
Domestic : a form of tertiary attraction where one wants to perform domestic activities with or for someone. These activities can include cooking, cleaning, living together, or raising children together. A partnership based on domestic attraction may be called a domestic relationship or a DOR for short. (It should not be called a domestic partnership. Please refer to the history section). There does not seem to be a special name for a domestic datemate or crush. Domestic attraction is often related to platonic and romantic attraction.
Dominant (see tutelary)
Dorare (see Doraric)
Doraric : A desire to be close to, serve, and even worship someone out of an adoration which derives itself from attractions that are neither explicitly romantic, nor explicitly platonic. Considered a mix of spiritual and alterous attractions. ; a desire to be close to, serve, help and even worship someone in awe arising out of an adoration which derives itself from attractions that are neither explicitly romantic, nor explicitly platonic. It is considered a mix of spiritual, emotional, and alterous attractions. One may experience attraction that fits multiple types at once, or has characteristics of multiple types of attraction while not strictly falling into any type. A type of orientation for those who say “I adore you”, but they don’t mean romantically or explicitly platonically. It is a means of expressing intense feelings for someone (such as passion), but it isn’t inherently sexual, romantic, platonic, etc. A doraric crush can be called a dish.
Dormant (see Virtudinal)
Ductuaffectis : a form of attraction in which one feels an animalistic sense of desire and connection to an individual. This term can be used for one who feels like the dedication, passion, and love they feel is almost pet-like in nature. For example, one may feel a sense of loyalty and love for a person that they can only describe as being 'like a dog would feel to its owner.' This term was coined with alterhumans and non-human headmates within systems in mind, however anyone can experience this attraction. This may also be commonly experienced by those who experience species regression, or a neurodivergent individual with strong connection to animals.
Ductuaffian (see ductuaffectis)
Eating (see Alimentary)
Echidaen : a term for systems used to describe a unique attraction between two or more intelligible non-human system members. The attraction these system members experience between each other can be any form, such as queerplatonic, alterous, romantic, aesthetic, sexual, or platonic, or it could be a completely unique sense of attraction that only their species can feel and no others can describe. This term is not to be used by systems who are anti-endogenic or against any non-traumagenic system.
Ecstatic (see emotional)
Emotional : A broad term for a desire for commitment and mutual emotional nurturing, regardless of a relationship’s specific nature. To feel emotionally attracted to someone is to desire being consistently supportive of and supported by that person emotionally. Subtypes may include amorous, romantic, (q)platonic, mental, and amical attraction. ; This type of attraction isn’t necessarily physical in nature and is rooted in a desire for connection because of someone’s heart, mind, or personality. ; experiencing attraction that fits multiple types at once, or has characteristics of multiple types of attraction while not strictly falling into any type. (this is sometimes called ‘doraric’ attraction)
Eriattraction : Eri comes from the Finnish word “erilainen”, which means different. It would mean different attraction from romantic or sexual. It is similar to tertiary attraction, but was coined here as an alternative to tertiary since tertiary attraction could be considered problematic. It separates it from romantic and sexual, but doesn’t make it seem like non-romo and non-sex attractions are inferior. It would also vary from person to person what the term encompasses - basically, it’d be a single term for someone who experiences two or more non-romantic and/or non-sexual types of attraction.
Erotic : Appreciation for sexual arts or a desire to know someone using one’s senses through explicitly sexual acts (such as gouinage). Considered a mix of aesthetic, sensual, and sexual attraction.
Experial : Experiencing some other form of attraction as feeling the same as another form of attraction. Not desiring the things associated with that attraction but experiencing them in the same way.
Exteramo : A type of attraction that is neither platonic or romantic. An attraction that is not in between platonic and romantic, but rather exists outside of platonic and romantic attraction. “Isn’t that just alterous attraction?” No, alterous attraction comes with the implication of being in between platonic and romantic attraction, or partially romantic or platonic, while exteramo is off the spectrum entirely. ; A significant interest or desire for emotional closeness with a particular person, that falls outside of platonic and/or romantic attraction.
Familial : Desiring an emotional closeness with another by virtue of them being family, or desiring an emotional closeness with an unrelated other that mimics a traditionally/idealized familial bond. ; a form of tertiary attraction based on a desire for a strong familial attachment, or a desire for emotional closeness with another by virtue of them being family. This can refer to the relationship one has with their actual family, but it can also be the desire for emotional closeness from those unrelated to oneself in a way that that mimics a traditionally/idealized familial bond. This may be seen as a chosen family.
Fictional : attraction to fictional characters
Fidelis : also called Loyal attraction, turns the phrases such as "you are my one and only" and "only you, no one else" into something that describes an attraction or a relationship. An individual with this attraction would feel a deep sense of, potentially even overwhelming, loyalty to someone and feels that the individual they are attracted to is the only one. This term is quite similar to Ductuaffectian Attraction but does not directly include a pet-to-owner type of attraction, however it can be used in place of the term. It can also be combined with other tertiary attractions, examples being fidelisplatonic and fidelisalterous, it also can be used on its own depending on the individual.
Flectic : a form of tertiary attraction where one experiences attraction that is best described as changing based on the nature of a relationship. For example, someone flectically attracted to a friend would know that if they dated said friend, they would develop romantic attraction. Flectic attraction, by nature, changes with dynamic. If flectic attraction doesn't change--for example, still feeling romantic attraction after breaking up--it likely can no longer be considered flectic. A flectic person may experience attraction similar to alterous attraction, the main difference being that flectic attraction can change to and from alterous. Flectic individuals may identify as demisexual in some form, as recipromantic, or reciprosexual. Flectic attraction is its own form of attraction, and may be associated with other orientations, though it was originally intended as an a-spec identity. It may be used alongside or interchangeably with similar a-spec labels. Someone who one is in a flectic relationship with could be called a flecfriend. A flectic crush is called a fleck.
Flushed : an attraction very similar to the current definition of romantic attraction. Characterized by feelings of romantic love, and generally (but not necessarily) sexual attraction. Some gestures of flushed affection may include hugs, hand holding and kisses. A flushed partner is called a Matesprit. A flushed relationship is called a Matespritship.
Following : A type of attraction that is always attached to one (or more) other types. Someone who experiences this can be called folgattracted. For example, someone who only experiences romantic attraction when it’s paired with aesthetic attraction. They may or may not be able to experience aesthetic attraction independently. This can also be called attached attraction and can be described as ‘I experience [type]-attached [dependent type] attraction’. For example, someone whose platonic attraction is attached to/dependent on their alterous attraction could says that they experience alterous-attached platonic attraction. Folgattracted comes from ‘folgen’ meaning ‘to follow’ in German.
Grace : desire for a guided-like relationship ; experiencing protected/guarded attraction (valuing the relationship more than others, doing things together exclusively, possible physical affection, possible grooming and being physically close, emotional and mental dependence, ‘following behind’ or willing to release some independence, but not completely or by force; may be platonic, romantic, a mix, or some other type) (also called submissive and concomitant)
Guardian : experiencing protective attraction (valuing the relationship more than others, doing things together exclusively, possible physical affection, emotional reliance, possible grooming and being physically close, feeling protective or guide-like emotions; may be platonic, romantic, a mix, or some other type) (also called tutelary or dominant)
Idyllic : a form of attraction in which one desires, fantasizes about, or wishing they were attracted to a certain gender despite not being attracted to that gender in real life. This also includes wishing or fantasizing about being attracted to a gender in a different way than one is in really life. (For example: fantasizing about being romantically attracted to a given gender despite only feeling platonic attraction to that gender in real life.) This may or may not overlap with one being buenosexual. Idyllic attraction can be similar to cupioromantic and/or electio aroace. However it is different from electio aroace because someone can feel idyllic attraction while still feeling other forms of tertiary attraction. It's also different from cupioromantic and electio aroace because idyllic attraction says nothing about one's real life actions or desires. One may or may not want to act on their idyllic attraction. Someone with idyllic attraction may fantasize about feeling a certain attraction, but recognizes that they do not want or can never have that sort of relationship in real life. Idyllic attraction can be combined with any other relevant sexuality terms. As an example, an aroace person to fantasizes about being attracted to men and women could be bi-idyllic.
Immanent (see Virtudinal)
Immaterial (see Virtudinal)
Impersonal : an umbrella term or a modifier for a form of attraction that involves interpersonal interaction, that does not involve personal factors. Impersonal attraction is does not include intrapersonal affectionacy, extrapersonal involvement, social, emotional or amical attraction. It could be considered a subtype of platonic attraction or mental attraction. The crush alternative for impersonal attraction is a vash. It's the kind of attraction that based on a desire for being acquaintances with someone, rather than being friends with them. It can be based around an appreciation for someones personal demeanor. One can like someone for what they are, but not for who they are. It can sometimes be seen as an aesthetic attraction. It is useful for aplatonic, anamical and asocial people.
Intangible (see Virtudinal)
Intellectual : The desire to “share a mindspace” with another by exchanging wisdom, knowledge, or interests. Related to social relationships, but generally where the object of such attraction is not considerered “socially superior.” ; This type of attraction isn’t necessarily physical in nature and is rooted in a desire for connection due to someone’s intelligence. ; experiencing mental attraction (valuing their opinions, fascination with their point of view or perception of reality, adoration of their field of intelligence (not how smart, but what they’re smart in), valuing their existence more than others (non-obsessively), interest in their persona, fascination and appreciation of their ‘mental map’ (how they see the world/how their mind ‘works’), desiring partnership or guide-like relationships, possibly other traits of attraction; may be mixed with another type of attraction but not always)
Interpersonal : the attraction between people which leads to friendships and romantic relationships
Invidious : or envious attraction, is a tertiary form of physical attraction based on a feeling of envy towards an individual’s appearance or presentation. Invidious attraction is defined as an attraction to the way an individual looks or how they present themselves that is rooted in envy or a desire to have a similar appearance or presentation. Invidious attraction may include a desire to observe, interact with, or fantasize about the target of attraction. Invidious attraction is not an inherently hostile or resentful feeling, and instead is based upon a desire to appear or present similarly to the target individual. It may instead be characterized by discontent/dysphoria or desire/euphoria. Invidious attraction is similar to the concept of gender envy and they may be considered synonyms, or they may be considered separate related concepts. Both concepts deal with a feeling of envy regarding an individual’s appearance or presentation, but possible distinctions include: Gender envy does not necessarily include a feeling of attraction towards the target. Invidious attraction does not necessarily have to do with gender presentation and can relate to aspects of presentation unrelated to gender. Invidious attraction is similar to aesthetic attraction, but is specifically rooted in a feeling of envy. This attraction may be considered a type of aesthetic attraction.
Kismesic (see pitch)
Latent (see Virtudinal)
Loben Attraction: a form of emotional attraction and desire to praise a specific individual. One who experiences loben attraction may desire a preisic relationship, or simply desire to praise the target of ones attraction. Some indicators one is experiencing loben attraction is feeling excited, fuzzy, overjoyed, and/or simply desiring to praise a specific person. A loben crush may be called a preis, while a loben partner may be called a praiser or praised.
Loyal (See Fidelis)
Ludic : an attraction characterized by ludus love. It involves activities such as teasing and dancing, or more overt flirting, seducing, and conjugating, focused in fun and sometimes also on conquest, with no strings attached.
Material (see presential)
Matespritic (see Flushed)
Mental : An umbrella term for any form of intellectual/psychological and spiritual attractions. ; also known as Intellectual Attraction or Psychological Attraction is a form of tertiary attraction based on the desire to forming an intellectual bond with someone in particular. The bond is related to an exchange of wisdom, knowledge and interests. This term is similar to social attraction, however someone who is asocial would likely resonate more with mental attraction. A mental attraction crush could be called a mish.
Mindian attraction: an attraction that cannot and should not be described in any other way than “attraction felt in the mind”.
Mirous : a type of attraction where one has a libido spike (a non-libidoist becoming a libidoist due to an individual) or feeling sexually drawn to someone because of the way they look or how they present themselves. This is distinct from sexual attraction, as sexual attraction is a form of physical attraction based on a desire for sexual interaction (sexual intercourse, sexually touching/groping, etc) with a particular individual, whereas mirous attraction is simply the desire to look at and admire/gain enjoyment from looking at someone sexually. It is similar to and is often compared to/seen as the sexual version of aesthetic attraction. It can also be described as a strong desire to gaze in admiration at someone who incites sexual interest/sexual-related thoughts or feelings. This can include their physical features, their curves and shape, their bearing, how they move, how they dress, etc.
Mixture : multiple attraction types felt at once
Moirallegic : an attraction founded on a desire to support, protect, and form a committed and deep emotional relationship with an individual. A pale partner is called a Moirail. A pale relationship is called a Moirallegiance. Aspec pale attraction can be called apallidic.
Multiaesthetic : an umbrella term for any form of aesthetic attraction to more than one gender. It can describe people who are biaesthetic, panaesthetic, polyaesthetic, omniaesthetic, etc, or can be used as a stand-alone identity if one does not wish to specify their aesthetic attraction further. The sexual and romantic counterparts are multisexual and multiromantic. Its gender counterpart is multigender.
Navis : a tertiary attraction in which a attraction of some sort gets tangled up with a “they look so cute together” type thing. Navis is Latin for ship (since this is inspired by shipping culture).
Nebulous : a type of attraction experienced by those who can't, or don't, distinguish between attraction types. This is meant for individuals who specifically don't distinguish between different types of nonsexual or nonphysical attraction. ; a type of attraction experienced by those who can't, or don't, distinguish between attraction types. This is meant for individuals who specifically don't distinguish between different types of nonsexual or nonphysical attraction. individuals who experience nebulous attraction may refer to nonsexual attraction as being a part of "the blob;" any attraction that is not sexual falls into this one nebulous category. In other words, one may consider all forms of nonsexual attraction to be different versions of the same thing, with no clear distinguishability between them. Types of attraction included in the blob may be, but are not limited to: romantic attraction, platonic attraction, queerplatonic attraction, alterous attraction, amical attraction, mental attraction. individuals who experience nebulous attraction can typically easily identify sexual attraction, though some may also find it hard to distinguish from similar attraction types, such as aesthetic or sensual. individuals who experience nebulous attraction typically sort their attraction and/or relationship types into two categories: sexual (or physical), and the blob (everything else). individuals who experience nebulous attraction may also identify as sensualarian, relationship anarchist, quoiromantic, platoniromantic, idemromantic, nebularomantic, or similar identities. This label is intended for neurodivergent usage, but anyone can use it if it is applicable and helpful in describing their attraction. The nebulous label can be combined with other specific orientation labels. For example, pannebulous, anebulous, or lesbiannebulous.
Noetic : a form of mental attraction based on appreciating and being interested in one's opinions, point of view, perception of reality, how they see the world, and how their mind works. It is based on an admiration of their perspectives or opinions, and possibly a desire for a guide-like or apprentice-like relationship. It can also involve valuing their existence more than others, interest in their persona, emotional reliance, and favoring their input and guidance.
Non-Conforming Attraction (NCA) : refers to individuals who do not conform to common societal perceptions in regards to attraction in one's lifestyle. This includes, but isn't limited to: Sexually non-conforming individuals, Romantically non-conforming individuals, Those who do not experience platonic attraction, alterous attraction, etc., Those who are repulsed by platonic, alterous, etc. acts
Non-Parental (see aparental)
Non-Rose : umbrella term for attractions that are not romantic or sexual! alternative to the term "tertiary attraction," as it can imply a relationship hierarchy in which romantic and sexual attractions are more important. rose is from the first two letters of romantic and sexual, as seen in greyrose
Nontertiary (see atertiary)
Objectum
Orientated (see oriented)
Oriented : experiencing a non-romantic, non-sexual attraction that is significant enough to label in addition to romantic and/or sexual orientation(s). The attraction being experienced does not need to be defined. Can be used alone or combined with other terms (e.g. gay-orientated). ; a term used to describe an individual's experience with attraction which does not specify the form of attraction being experienced. ; Orientated may be used as a suffix to describe one's orientation when an individual does not want to or does not feel the need to specify what forms of attraction they are experiencing. It may also be used to describe an individual's experience with tertiary attractions that they feel are important enough to their identity to label alongside their romantic and sexual attractions. Alternatively, orientated may be used as a stand-alone label without further description of the experienced attraction, optionally making orientated unlabeled. In this case, orientated would imply that the individual experiences an attraction, but would not elaborate on what form of attraction it is or who it is felt towards.
Pack Attraction : “(like familial, romantic, whatever), and it's a form of attraction where I essentially want to form a close found family esque "household" with a bunch of people. I want to form a pack. By household I mean a single, condensed group. My ideal would clearly be the entire pack living together in a bigish house, but just meeting up often with the entire group would probably be sufficient. I suppose it could be considered familial attraction, as family is a very broad and all encompassing term. Family shouldn't just mean parents, children, blood relatives, a hierarchy, but to me it does. So I see my attraction as that of a strange pack, a group of people bonded to each other who all care for each other deeply. It's deeply emotional and animalistic for me.” (Quoted directly from this post)
Pale Attraction (see Moirallegic)
Parental : an attraction one feels when one desires to raise a child with a particular individual. It is a subtype of familial attraction. This kind of attraction can sometimes be encompassed by other attractions such as romantic, but is not always. A possible term for a parental crush is “prush" or "prash”. A potential relationship name is “parenthood” and one's parenthood partner can be called a “co-parent”. One who does not experience parental attraction may identify as nonparental. It should also be noted that experiencing parental attraction is not simply wanting to have sex with someone or experiencing sexual attraction. Someone who experiences parental attraction wants to raise a child with their partner(s), and it's also important to note that they may want to adopt a child and not actually have one.
Partnerbased and Partnerdependent
Partnering (see Amorous)
Peculic : A subtype of considatore attraction caused by queer people respecting/supporting each other based on their identities. This is related to queerplatonic attraction, but is not the same thing. (Exclusive to queer people)
Physical : This describes the desire for touch or to receive touch — not necessarily in a romantic or sexual way. For example, this can include hugging or kissing a family member or petting a dog. ; more about the longing of wanting to be physically close to a particular person and to touch them or be touched by them.
Pitch : an attraction founded on a simultaneous hatred and respect for another individual. You could think of a pitch relationship like a committed rivalry that takes on characteristics of a romantic relationship. Like matespritic attraction, there can (but doesn’t necessarily have to) be a sexual component to kismesic attraction. A pitch partner is called a Kismesis. A pitch relationship is called a Kismesissitude.
Platonic : An interest or desire for friendship or other close relationship with a particular person. Most often, this relationship is non-romantic and non-sexual, but this can vary depending on the person. ; This is the nonsexual or nonromantic desire to be in a relationship with someone. Friendships, for example, are often platonic. ; desiring platonic interaction (nonsexual touch, doing things together exclusively, valuing the relationship more than others (possibly), friendship, making lifelong decisions together, relying on each other emotionally)
Platonic-ish a term/attraction that can be used by anyone who feels like their feelings are platonic-ish, or platonic but in a very apl way
Platonicity (see Amical)
Playful : an Emotional Attraction in which the individual experiencing the attraction often wants to play with the individual they are attracted to in some way. The way one wants to play can include things like roughhousing, playing multiplayer video games, competing with one another for any particular prize, running about and/or chasing one another, and more depending on how the individual involved enjoy playing. A playful partner would be considered a playmate.
Potential : Attraction based on being able forming a hierarchical bond with someone else, where one partner is more dominant/supportive in a non-sexual and non-romantic way. This includes types such as Tutelary (Protective), Cedural (Dependent), and Wechselnd attraction. The flag is based off the Tutelary and Cedural flags. ; Potential attraction, also known as Bonding attraction, is defined as a tertiary attraction characterized by the ability to form a hierarchical bond with someone else.[1] This would be a bond of in which one partner is more dominant, protective, or supportive than another, in a way in which is not sexual or romantic. This umbrella includes: Tutelary attraction ; Cedural attraction ; Templatonic ; Sysplatonic ; Dependplatonic ; Wechselnd attraction
Preisen Attraction: a form of emotional attraction and desire for praise from a specific individual. One who experiences preisen attraction and desire a preisic relationship, or simply desire to be praised by the target of ones attraction. Some indicators one is experiencing preisen attraction is feeling excited, fuzzy, overjoyed, and/or simply desiring praise from a specific person. A preisen crush may be called a preis, while a preisen partner may be called a praiser or praised.
Presential : is a type of tertiary attraction based on a desire to know someone through their physical presence. It is similar to sensual attraction but one does not desire physical contact or intimacy with the person, just to know them through their presence. Presential attraction often occurs alongside another type of attraction such as platonic, social, or aesthetic attraction. A presential crush is known as a swoon. Presential attraction is the opposite of virtudinal attraction. Someone who does not experience presential attraction may be called apresential. ; It means desiring someone presentially and physically (concretely, representationally and manually) without necessarily touching them (as in sensual attractional).
Protective (see guardian)
Protective (see tutelary)
Pseudosexual : a form of tertiary attraction describing attraction which mimics or borders on sexual attraction. Pseudosexual attraction is not sexual attraction. Distinctions may include the attraction not being physical or not including a drive for sexual interaction. Despite this, pseudosexual attraction is often followed by sexual arousal or a libido spike which are generally characteristic of sexual attraction.
Psychological (see intellectual)
Qaeustus : a form of tertiary attraction defined by admiration towards someone. People who experience quaestus attraction experience admiration towards someone and they may also want to spend their life with this person. A quaestus crush may be called a stuscrush, and a quaestus partner may be simply called a "quaestus." Compliments that people in a quaestus relationship may give each other may include, "I admire you", "I want to be like you", "You are simply exceptional," and things along those lines.
Quarasexual : an asexual identity when one feels strong sensual and/or aesthetic attraction in place of where sexual attraction would be. An alternative way to describe it is if there was a hole where sexual attraction feelings would be but it was filled in with strong sensual and/or aethestic attraction feelings to replace what was never there. "Quar-" is a prefix is taken from the word quartz, which the flag is also themed after (specifically rose quartz). Then ending of the word comes from "asexual" (obviously)
Quaromantic : an aromantic identity when one feels strong alterous and/or exteramo attraction in place of where romantic attraction would be. An alternative way to describe it is if there was a hole of where romantic feelings would be but it was filled in with strong alterous and/or exteramo feelings to replace what was never there. Those who are quaromantic desire emotional closeness with others in a way that is not romantic but more than platonic. The pronunciation is "kwah-row-man-tic". Quaro ("kwah-row") for short.
Quasiplatonic : A relationship that is not romantic but involves close emotional connection beyond what is considered friendship. A quasiplatonic relationship can also be described as an intense relationship with a strong bond characterized by love, but not of a romantic type.
Queerplatonic : A committed non-romantic relationship that goes beyond what is the subjective cultural norm for a friendship. Levels of intimacy and/or behaviors between the partners involved often don’t fit the conventional standards set by society. Some QPRs can include sex and elements that are generally considered romantic. In practice every queerplatonic relationship is different. Abbreviated to QPR, and queerplatonic (quasiplatonic) partner to QPP. Another common word for QPP used to be zucchini. ; (also referred to as qplatonic, quasiplatonic, and quirkyplatonic) Like alterous, it is neither romantic nor platonic, but can be functionally similar to both; a type of attraction that (while certainly aromantic) cannot be properly reduced to platonic without leaving some important aspects out. Also used as an umbrella term for any relationship that falls outside of the strict “romantic-or-platonic” binary. ; desiring interaction that is not 100% platonic, but is actually more, while not being 100% romantic either (kissing, cuddling, handholding, nonsexual touch, being physically close, affectionate speech, doing things together exclusively, valuing the relationship more than others)
Romantic : This can describe a deep emotional interest or connection that isn’t purely physical or sexual in nature. ; desiring romantic interaction (being physically close, affectionate speech, living together, making lifelong commitment decisions, romantic affection, doing things together exclusively, valuing the relationship more than others)
Romantically Non-Conforming (RNC) : refers to those who do not conform to society's romantic lifestyle views. This includes, but isn't limited to : Aromantic individuals and those on the aromantic spectrum, Individuals who are romance-ambivalent, romance-neutral/romance-indifferent, romance-averse, or romance-repulsed, When one is disinterested, dislikes, or is repulsed by romantic activities, Romanceless and romantically loveless individuals. It falls under non-conforming attraction. The sexual counterpart is sexually non-conforming.
Roundattractional : an identity defined as consciously or unconsciously changing the attraction one has towards a specific individual due to a difficulty distinguishing two or more types of attraction. For example, one might be experiencing alterous attraction but they are not sure if it’s alterous or romantic, and it ends up becoming romantic due to the uncertainty. An individual can identify as just “roundattractional” or as “roundattractional x to y”, where “x” is the original attraction, often found out after it changed, and “y” is the resulting attraction. “x” and “y” can be the combination of multiple attractions.
Sanguineros : an attraction type where one’s love, desire, and connection strengthens greatly after drinking their partner’s/lover’s blood. This was made with sanguinarian vampires in mind, but this can be used by anyone regardless of being a vampire or not.
Sensorial (see sensual)
Sensual : An interest or desire to touch or be physically close to someone, in a non-sexual way such as hugging or cuddling. ; Very similar to physical attraction, sensual attraction describes a desire to touch or receive touch that isn’t necessarily sexual in nature. ; desiring sensual interaction (kissing, cuddling, handholding, nonsexual touch, stroking, grooming, physical affection, sharing space, being physically close)
Sexual : An interest or desire for sexual contact or interaction with a particular person. ; This attraction takes the form of the desire for intimately physical or sexual contact with someone. ; Being sexually attracted to someone and having the desire to be with them on a physical and intimate level. ; desiring sexual interaction (sexual intercourse, sexually touching/groping, kissing, finding sexual pleasure)
Sexually Non-Conforming (SXNC or XNC) : refers to those who do not conform to society's sexual lifestyle views. This includes, but isn't limited to: Asexual individuals and those on the asexual spectrum, Those who are sex-ambivalent, sex-neutral/sex-indifferent, sex-averse, or sex-repulsed, Those who are sex-repulsed by intercourse or certain sexual acts, Those who are repulsed by genitals. It falls under non-conforming attraction. The romantic counterpart is romantically non-conforming.
Shifting (see Wechselnd)
Social : “Aspirational” or mentor-attraction; a desire to be closer to and/or more like someone because of their perceived talent and/or wisdom.
Solaic : a form of alterous attraction founded upon a mutual bond of comfort and understanding. Unlike platonic attraction in which a friendship is sought, solaic attraction desires a bond only understood through a deep, emotional connection with another person that is founded upon safety and positivity. Those in solaic relationships may feel as if it is easier to confide within their solar than it is within most platonic relationships, even though they may value their solaic relationship as equal to their friendships. The relationship between solars may be quite difficult to describe, but it feels somewhat distinct from any experiences (or lack thereof) with platonic relationships.
Spintellic : a form of attraction in which one desires to tell someone about their special interest and/or hyperfixation ; “Basically, it’s when you want to infodump, share a special interest, or talk about a hyperfixation with someone specific. This can accompany other forms of attraction (eg. platonic, romantic, social, etc); however, it doesn’t have to. Personally, I experience spintellic attraction on its own because I’m mono-spec (I only experience one form of allo-attraction, which is aesthetic attraction). Obviously, this form of attraction is exclusive to those whose neurotype involves special interests and/or hyperfixations. One can add a prefix to spin/spintell/spintellic if they want to. For example, someone who experiences spintellic attraction regardless of gender might identify as panspin, panspintell, or panspintellic. Whichever they prefer. I probably won’t be using it in this way though.” (quote taken from coining post here
Spiritual : A desire to be close to another (regardless of the nature of said closeness) based on the belief or feeling that such a relationship is “destiny,” or that the object of such attraction once had a relationship with the subject in a “past life” of sorts. In some cases, it can be used as a subset of social attraction — desiring a mentor-student-type relationship with someone based on their strong spirituality. ; Attraction based on liking someone else’s spirituality and wanting to do spiritual things together. This form of attraction is similar to Social attraction since you want the guidance of another person. Spiritual attraction may also involve feelings of having been in a relationships with someone in a past life. The flag is based off the colors associated with Spiritual attraction. ; experiencing spiritual attraction (valuing their opinions, emotional and mental reliance, valuing their existence more than others (non-obsessively), desiring partnership or guide-like relationships, spiritual bonding, doing things together exclusively, friendship, possible familial bonds, possible physical affection, performing spiritual practices together, fascination, interest in their persona)
Subjective : exclusive to those who identify as or who are a deity of some sort. It is described as the warm feeling one has when looking down at their subjects. For one individual, this may be humans and those on Earth which believe that they are real. For another individual like a god/goddess or a deity of higher power, it may also include nymphs, spirits, and others which are beneath them in the caste system of their universe. Subjective attraction can also be described as "a deity looking down at [their] subjects with a warm smile as [they see] them playing and living life." It can be described as a relationship; for example, Christians describe their religion as a relationship with God, and if one were to identify as the Christian God, they may use this form of attraction. However, the relationship cannot be considered romantic, queerplatonic, or other forms of attraction related to the previously mentioned. Someone who experiences any form of subjective attraction may add a gendered prefix, like pansubjective or demideistic, however this is not required and may actually be preferred for most individuals. If one does not add a prefix, they may choose to simply say, "I experience divine attraction."
Submissive (see Cedural)
Supranormal (see Virtudinal)
Switch (see Wechselnd)
Sysplatonic : a form of platonic attraction that only occurs within systems. This type of attraction is from members of the system, most commonly littles, to protectors and/or caregivers. It is the wish to be protected, cared for, and nurtured by another member in ones system. This attraction only occurs within DID, OSDD, and other kinds of systems, and should not be used outside of those. The non-system version is cedural attraction. The DPD (dependent personality disorder) version is dependplatonic. The protectors version/protectors side is Templatonic.
Tangible (see presential)
Templatonic : a form of platonic attraction that only occurs within systems. This type of attraction is from protectors and/or caregivers to other members of the system, most commonly littles. It is the wish to protect, care for, and nurture another member in your system. This attraction only occurs within DID, OSDD, and other systems, and should not be used outside of those. The non-system version is tutelary attraction. The other members/littles side is sysplatonic.
Tertiary : An umbrella term that includes types of attraction that are not strictly categorizable into romantic attraction or sexual attraction.
Tertiary Pan : Is an individual, who experiences sexual/romantic attraction towards certain gender(s), yet their tertiary attraction (ex. emotional, platonic, queer platonic, aesthetic, etc.) is experienced regardless of gender. (Example: Gay (sexual/romantic attraction towards males), but experiences emotional, platonic, mental and aesthetic towards people regardless of their gender.) Titles: Tertiary Pan -> ex. Gay-pan, Lesbian-pan, Bi-pan (if confused search up the differences between pan and bi), Skolio-pan and etc. (This is also possible to be this way: tertiary lesbian-their ex. queer platonic attraction ‘grows’ and becomes sexual for women and nbys) + for some people there can be a slight preference towards gender (in my case women) for whom one experiences more tertiary attraction.)
Transcendent : characterized as an attraction that combines all intimate, non-familial attraction types while not fitting completely into the definition of any of them. Transcendent attraction can only be described as feeling like intense, undefined love and/or care, and desire for partnership. Relationships based on this attraction may fully or partially combine aspects of all relationship types. Despite combining aspects of relationships like romantic, sexual, platonic, and so on, transcendent attraction is not necessarily adjacent to these attraction types and can still be felt by those who identify as aspec for any particular attraction(s). This term can be used by anyone. Transcendent relationships will often include affection such as kissing or sex, but these actions tend to be based on intimacy rather than attraction. Transcendent attraction may be considered a form of tertiary attraction.
Tutelary : Also known as “protective attraction.” A desire to take care, protect and support another. It is the attraction one might feel towards a child, a pet, or a vulnerable person. It is often based in a desire to feel needed. ; also known as Protective Attraction or Dominant Attraction, is a form of tertiary attraction that revolves around a strong desire to take care, protect, and support a certain person. It is the counterpart and opposite of cedural attraction. With tutelary attraction when one sees someone in a sad or defenseless situation one feels not just sympathy but also a sense of attraction that gets them involved with that person and their needs. It is also based on a feeling of feeling needed or necessary. This is the attraction one might feel towards a child, younger sibling, a pet, or a vulnerable person one is favorably disposed toward. A relationship between protective and protected person can be labeled as guardianship, wardship, or tutelage. A person in that relationship who takes on the protective role could be called a comate, cherish, ward, or grace. A tutelary crush could be possibly be called a mush. This relationship should not be associated with DPD (dependent personality), protectors in systems (DID), or with BDSM and kink related power play sometimes seen in sexual/romantic relationships. The system version is templatonic.
Virtudinal : a form of attraction counterpart of presential attraction, whereas the individual(s) experience(s) the need or want to engage with someone else through a non-physical plane (i.e. thoughts) that is not tangible to the corporeality, the physical form or materialized body. This form of attraction can be obtained from descriptions of refero, cogitari, and lith, for example, while not essentially that. ; Attraction based on wanting to interact with someone else on a non-physical plane (for example, through thoughts). The flag is based on my simplified version of the Presential attraction flag, which I then inverted the colors of to show that Virtudinal/Intangible and Presential attractions are opposites.
Vital (see presential)
Vocal : see Aural
Waveric : also called waverous attraction or fluidic attraction, is a form of attraction that is fluid. This may or may not be caused by their attraction labels or the gender(s) of the individual(s) being fluid. They don't have to be waverous towards everyone they're attracted to. For example, one may feel waveric attraction towards their friend. They might feel platonic attraction towards them one day, romantic attraction the next, and then after that alterous attraction. However, a waverous individual can just as easily also experience non fluidous attraction.
Wavership : Describes a relationship that fluctuates or is fluid between different kinds of relationships. ; experiencing attraction that can fluctuate between different types or different expressions (called fluidic)
Wechselnd : alternatively called Switch Attraction, describes a tertiary style of potential attraction with relevance to both Cedural Attraction and Tutelary Attraction. Under Wechselnd Attraction, the subject's attraction style may fluctuate between Cedural or Tutelary depending on the emotional, intellectual, or otherwise state and context of the subject, as well as the individual they are attracted to. A subject may have a stronger Tutelary Attraction towards an individual who they are interested warding and otherwise protecting, but may have a more Cedural Attraction towards a different individual, or even with the same individual if they temporarily (or permanently) take on a more caretaker-esque role for the subject. The aspects and nature of the subject's Cedural or Tutelary attraction are intermittent, and may change or be nonextant depending on mood or context, two separate instances of the subject's Cedural attraction may look and feel different to the subject and to the recipient. The temporary and contextual nature of Wechselnd Attraction means that the way or ways that the subject finds an individual to be attractive in a sexual, romantic, or tertiary fashion, may be intermittent. For instance, you could enjoy a sexual attraction with an individual when your attraction to them is primarily Tutelary, but not when it is primarily Cedural. Even if you are sexually attracted to someone in both instances of Cedural and Tutelary attraction, the nature of that sexual attraction may change between them, or change depending on the day. This relationship should not be associated with DPD (dependent personality disorder), protectors in systems, or with BDSM and kink related power play sometimes seen in sexual/romantic relationships.
Xenial : a form of attraction based on hospitality. It is the sort of relationship portrayed or felt to fulfill a goal. It may also be called 'pragmatic’ attraction. It is exclusive to caretakers, escorts, service workers, doctors, therapists, hotel workers, and others who do a service that requires emotional engagement with another person, in return for some gain.