Basic DNI
DNI if white supremacist, nazi, trump supporter, MAGA supporter, Transphobic, ACAB supporter, BLM supporter, Centrist, Left-wing, Right-wing, communist, socialist, authoritarian, liberal, anarchist, monarchist, pro-democracy, fascist, tweet about politics ever, participate in advocate for minority rights, white, black, brown, have skin at all, are allocishet dyadic able-bodied neurotypical, blonde, "aromantic (spectrum)", "asexual (spectrum), blonde (I am very serious about this), xenogender, cisgender, proship, antiship, anti-anti, ship anybody at all, have interests, participate in fandoms, use slurs at ALL (Even if "reclaimed"), transgender, "non-binary", pro-endo, anti endo, system at all, singlet, get bitches, get no bitches, get some bitches, have boobs (they make me anxious), accept minorities, pro-oppression, respect pronouns, blonde, believe in transgenderism, believe that its possible to get bitches (I have tried and now have 50 restraining orders), don't respect pronouns, virgins, people who have had sex, cats, dogs, and animals in general, anti-enstars or fan of enstars, bluey fans, max and ruby fans, doc mcstuffins applogist, u like music, u think im not hotđ€š, you have self esteem, you glorify mental illness, you have mental illnesses, you make suicide jokes or say kys (kys), under 13 or over 13, whatever tf a genshinnie is, you dont believe thats what the point of the mask isđ, you kin walter white (im skyler white yoâŠ), you participate in the walter white stripe game, support @endricusđ€ŹđĄ, you get more dick than me (everybody), blonde, use tumblr, twitter, tiktok, reddit, or any social media except ponytown, you use emojis, you support yourself, you support @pkmngnders, you unironically use 4chan (virgin ass mf), you used miiverse when that was a thing, you were apart of the scribblenauts u community on miiverse, you like snakes, you are a snake, you are gay, you are lesbian, you have daddy issues, blonde, blue hair and/or pronouns, 5â9 or shorter, you support the prepretrator of the animal crossing space buns controversy, you hate furries, if your name starts with an s and you are 5â2 with short ginger hair, freckles, dimples, and usually wear a t-shirt and jeans with white socks and vans, warrior cats kinnies, you are my signifigant other, you are polyamorous, you are monogamous, you are ambiamorous, you are a middle schooler /srs, you like mlp, you like dsmp, you like anime, you like manga, bi/pan, you like American cartoons, you like American TV shows, you like kdramas, cdramas, jdramas, Marxist-Lesbianists, SWCC (Socialism with Cis Characteristics), mspec gay, mspec lesbian, mspec, monospec, have sex, watch vtubers, streamers, commentary YouTubers, you read books, youâre literate, youâre illiterate, you own a book, youâve read magazines, youâve been to school, you havenât been to school, you like school, you hate school, you use neopronouns, you donât have pronouns, dni if you, dni in general, you use he she or they pronouns, you interact with people who use pronouns, BRIISH, FRNCH, Amercan, from a country, were born at a young age, astronauts, animal crossing supporters (It advocates for exploitation of child labor, as shown by Tom Nook forcing your character to off debt instead of giving your house for free the true socialist way (just think, how did nook get a chain of unregularted islands)) ((((if you want more proof read the shocking callout post titled "the terrible secret of animal crossing)))), support briish âpeopleâ, use pluralkit or tupperbox, @Lucian Supporter đ, Lucario Supporter, sex supporter, blonde, ginger, have ever sinned, have ever watched cinemasins, unironically use facebook, you fucked MY mother, you killed me >:(, youâre older than me, youâre younger than me, you pee, sonic the hedgehog supporters/apologists, pro-sports, have a name that starts with a Ó, pro-salami, anti-salami, anti-salamic, supporter of anything, if you have spelt anything wrong in your life, speakers (ANY kind of ooospeaker), politicians, heavy babies, support having sex with cabbage, donât support sexy cabbage, ancient âŠ, m
.p soon, you support the microwave, orangutans, the animal kingdom, youâre born in the 1840s, twink, you have a pet seal, youâre my mom, anti-thunderstorms, jalapeno poppers, parabolas, math supporters in general, men, youâve had a lovely sleep last night, satanists under 5, you believe in geese, David, you need barbeque sauce from the store, you took my watermelon, Train (band), you think birds are real (Proof that they are not), you can see (thats ableist), enjoying your day today, remember anything, you hate the Lego movie, think the world didnât end in 2008, you don't have headaches, you stan yuri from ddlc , you like crackers, you put your bed in the middle of your room, you own a pig, or pug, you watch bjuu mike, you have a mom, you don't have a dad (fatherless), you have no bitches, you're a blonde 16 yo girl (especially if you do cheerleading), you're a god, your name is gaylord, satanists from 30-45 (other ages r okay tho, except under 5 again,) laveyan satanists of any age, you use parentheses, you say maidenless, you watch stanzi potenza, you are stanzi potenza, you eat OATMEAL (ew), you're mogai-pride-flags (He's half pussy ew), or mogai-(anything here), you unironically use AAVE without knowing the actual meaning of what the fuck you are saying /srs, you speak at all, uh⊠You find me ugly, I fucked your mother (Everyone), you like men, you like women, youâre gay, you lick toes or eat ankles, you shower, you bathe, you're stinky, you're a bozo (L bozo), you use emojis đ„Ž, you say ""mewtuals"" or ""meowtuals"", you're a popular mogai coiner (i'm looking at you, kenochoric, neopronouns, mogai-sunflowers), you are (you just are), you're gay, you're a map/pedo/zoo/etc, have ligma, you have a penis, women, you are kanye west,dont listen to my chemical romance, you do listen to my chemical romance, think country is a bad genre of music, actually enjoy country music, drink chemicals, drink soda, drink starbucks coffee, you're an anonymous walrus, or ferret, or panda, drink water, breathe the same air as everyone else (you dont belong in our society), hfjone liker, bdsm (fuck kink), blonde and names Noah, your name is Jack, your name is Jackie, your name is owen, your name is captain, or 3, or aggie, your name is roy, your name is sam, your name is kai, your name is kaito, your name is liam, your name is bakugou katsuki, your name is rain, your name is cauli, your name is ash, your name is legoshi, your name is charity, your name is flow, your name is flower/floe or any variant, your name is storm/jay/stormjay or any variant, your name is toesankles, your name is taken from another language, you pee and shit, you read boyfriends webtoon, you read heartstopper, your name is wall/wallaby or any variant, you have ever eaten popcorn, gayromantic people ew, aromantic people ew, you can write, twistcmyk, you're a system, @gnder-mailman, @rvenant-coining, @sqdthing, @sp*ritchannel, @frkthing, @ndricus, @kruliom, @dcyd-fnd*tns, @mgai-reblog, @mgaiwrp, n8y, are a mgai coiner, you like feet, you support justanothersyscourse, you support sysmedsaresexist, you support any syscourse at all, you are toilet, you aren't as gay as me, you arent like extremely suicidal(sus nobody is not like this nowadays), you enjoy men, you like minecraft, splatoon enjoyer, you like to fart, you like Undertale or Deltarune, you hate undertale or deltarune, you enjoy the top gun movies, you are toiletgender, youâre queer, you have splatoon, you scream at splatoon, you are captain kin, you have a partner, youâre single, you are a lesbian, is bisexual or pansexual or whatever, like anime boys, you say slayyyy, you fart outside, you fart in crowded elevators, have an opinion on any subject at all, are not what medical proffesionals call delusional, your name is NOT lucifer, willing to correct me on anything, not a narcissist, your name is kucifer, you use neopronouns (/j), singlets, systems, you use a name from the dsmp, you dont use a name from the dsmp, you kiss anyone, you make eye contact, you donât make eye contact, you live laugh love, you die cry hate, youâve drinken strawberry milk before, you drink yogurt, like yogurt in GENERAL, as well as man yogurt đ€š, are anonymous nyan cat, you breathe air, you use an iron lung, are anonymous chameleon, you own more than two pennies / penises, you are currently eating a steak, you havenât made stimboards for your partners, you like cave story, you don't like cave story, you've never heard of cave story, cringe at animal jam, switch haver, if you like humans in general (die), m ,bad at rhythm games, good at rhythm games, it took you months to find out how to spell rhythm (me), you fucking like pink (singer or color), you hate green or blue, you like green and blue <- dreamnotfound shipper/j, have a birthday, youâre anonymous chameleon, WAS EVER BORN, USE TWITTER đ, youâre on genshintwt, if you understand how to use twitter, survived the long dni crash, you survived the great dni wipe of 2022, DID NOT SURVIVE THE CRASH, youâre on ponytown, youâre a pony irl, youâre good at math, have used any social media other than tumblr since 2014, if youâve even THOUGHT about the word twitter, if you draw with the mousepad on your computer, you draw at all, you even have a SMIDGE of art skills, use a tablet to draw, use a mouse to draw, have an nft or are an nft vro, use the word creamy, you know about the million dollar banana taped to a canvas, you donât have over 100 hours in among us, like 2012 tmnt, like sour cream, are american, you write slurs in the documents, white people, white people, whit people, men kisser (/j), hate boy liker cat, motherfuckers (me fr), name starts with a, name starts with b, name starts with with c, name starts with d, name starts with e, name starts with f, name starts with g, name starts with h, name starts with I ( I can't emphasize this enough), name starts with J, name starts with K, name starts with L, name starts with M, name starts with N, name starts with O, name starts with P, name starts with Q, name starts with R, name starts with S, name starts with T, name starts with u, name starts with V, name starts with W, name starts with X, name starts with Y, name starts with Z, if you deleted the mortified picture, YOU DELETED MY MEME OF PRINCIPAL OF THE THING/LH, if youâre doing the entire alphabets of names, if you arenât doing the entire alphabets of names, your name is squid, if youâre anonymous, the silly plane movie is your interest, if you did the Homestuck sharpie bath, your name is loris, or susan, or karen, or margaret, or a tammy, or a beth, or an angela, or a- SHOT(, if you did the dolphin experiment bwck in 1960, if you are, if youâre this one specific insect bothering me rn, YOU WATCHED TOP GUN MAVERICK, your name is maverick, your name is bradley, you like hangman, if you have ever had a username that contains the number 4, if you are a corndog fan (ew) , if you donât like corndogs, if you donât constantly switch tumblr usernames, if you've had the same Tumblr username for more than 2 weeks, if you changed your Tumblr username in the past month, if your pc couldnât keep up with the alphabet names, not drinking hot chocolate at this very moment, if you havenât been listening to the same song on repeat for an hour, if you listen to twenty one pilots or green day, didnât get the gir hoodie at hot topic when it first came out, if youâre spamming those seizure inducing gifs, if you're anonymous loris (gtfo), if you find family guy funny, if you play D&D, eddie munson, if you're dust sans, or horror sans, or killer sans, if you like the Heathers movie more than the musical, you still use Tumblr in 2022, if ur mom is gay, if you voted for reigen arataka in the Tumblr sexyman poll, you like the color cyan, ur bald, you want to have sex with sans the skeleton, if you dont wanty to have sex with sans the skeleton, you donât like idle games, if you never watched LPS popular as a kid when you were sick at your moms work office, you display immense amounts of fatherless behavior, if your name is walter hartwell white, if you live at 308 negra arroyo lane, albuquerque, new mexico, 87104, when you are speaking to law enforcement it is not an admission of guilt, if when you are speaking to your family your wife is the love of your life and your son is a big man, if there are things that they'll come to learn about you in the next few days, but despite all of that you had them in your heart, you're big boy long man sans, If your name is Yoshikage Kira and youâre 33 years old and your house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and you am not married and you work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and you get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. And if you don't smoke, but occasionally drink and are in bed by 11 PM, and make sure to get eight hours of sleep, no matter what and after having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed you usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, you wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning and you were told there were no issues at your last check-up and youâre trying to explain that you are a person who wishes to live a very quiet life and you take care not to trouble yourself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause you to lose sleep at night. That is how you deal with society, and you know that is what brings you happiness. Although, if you were to fight you wouldn't lose to anyone, You unironically e-date, Your from Portugal, you use the wrong your/youâre /lh, english speakers, have ADHD, if you would never give me up or let me down, if you'd never have truck sex, you arenât gay for objects (<- based) (iâm gay for. things) (im gay for ur mom) (IâM GAY FPR UR DAD), if you mispell âforâ if your name is walter hartwell white, if you live at 308 negra arroyo lane, albuquerque, new mexico, 87104, when you are speaking to law enforcement it is not an admission of guilt, if when you are speaking to your family your wife is the love of your life and your son is a big man, if there are things that they'll come to learn about you in the next few days, but despite all of that you had them in your heart, if ainât a fan of Friendship is Manly: Equestria Men (EQUESTRIA MEN REP LETâS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO), if you just did whatever happened to the doc rn, you just forgot what you were gonna add to the dni, you made the text bold, you shared your blog /silly, you're hungry rn, you like pizza, you like ice cream, you duck on those juicy popsicles đł, you chew ice /srs, you don't chew ice, you eat chocolate cake, you like chocolate fudge, nirvana(the band) hater, emophobes, called nirvana a t-shirt brand /ref (wdym nirvana is my favourite clothing brand /j), furry hater, furry lover, furry neutral, if youâre a meanie, if you are a Karen who is named Karen, pokemon hater, if you are Darth Sidious, if you think Vans are cooler than Converse (itâs 2009 get with the times), , Pokemon lover :(, scene kid (>:3) rawrr x3:, E, you feel like youâre gonna explode without attention, you are lonely, accidentaly read anonymous kraken as anonymous karen (đ«”) , you get more bitches than me (everyone), anonymous your mom, THAT STUPID ROCK TYPE GYM LEADER FROM POKEMON PLATIUM, if you own a backpack, you play gacha life, if you make edits , if you turned 13 on April 13, if you turned 18 on October 9th, you'd fuck koraidon or miraidon (AKA legendary whise silhouette looks like a penis), if youâre a secret third thing, if you're a secret 7th thing, football (american) enjoyer, you donât have over 200 posts, think the super bowl ads are funny, you can post a something of ur interest bc it;s too niche , you coin stuff, you don't participate in gay furry roleplay, you donât commit tax evasion, you pay that bri'ish tv tax ew, AND IIIIIIIIIIIIII WILLLLLLL ALWAYYYYYYYSSSSS LOVEEEEEE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, if you are good at playing any instrument, evil, flute dni, that wack ass tree from skyrim, donât have all 24 amogus achievements, refuse to use porta potties, if you are an eeper, if you dont support evilmario666 breaching containment, if youre a platypus named perry, heinz doofenshmirtz, you think spelling schwarzwĂ€lder is hard, you like spaghetti, you hate spaghetti, prefer marina spaghetti or meatballs, ranboo, you need oxygen to live (weak),you speak portuguese, you speak fake portuguese (Brazil), you speak spanish,you speak german, you speak russian, you speak english, you speak indonesian, you speak polish, you speak any language, you ship hangster/sereshaw, you donât ship floydshaw, you donât ship bowuigi, you have knee problems (and if you needed surgery for them, weaklings smh), if you donât like them putting chemicals in the water that turn the fricken frogs gay, if your name starts with a vowel, if your single, if your not single, if your name stars with a. Constant (consonant? Girl how does English) (consonant), if you have skill issues with spelling đ«”, if you actually can spell (me), you donât shake a businessman by the hand ( i shake his penis.), DHMIS hater, you like cardinals (stares at my friend), you listen to girl in red, you listen to carpetgarden, the autocorrect that wants me to correct carpetgarden to carpet garden, if you are autocorrect, you are sus, you like feet, you don't like those yummy salty n sweaty toes đ€€ (yummy) , you like splatoon, you enjoy putting the milk before the cereal, you enjoy sucking dick, you are dragon anon. you ate out my mother, YOU HAVE CAME AT ANY POINT IN YOUR LIFE (christains b like), you are fatherless, you have mommy issues or are motherless, have parents that never say sorry for their mistakes, you keep on forgetting what youâre gonna add to the dni, you say whoopsie daisy, (me), you say "toodles" (me) (also me), have a shit spine, If you watch dhmis, you are blonde, you keep adding your niche ass interests here, if you watch camp camp, watch RWBY, eat a pineapple), you ha,e shoved a shampoo bottle up your ass and then while in the er you had to lie in front of your parents that you accidentally slipped onto it and then it started bulging out since your ass couldn't hold it and they grounded you for a month for wasting shampoo, you have contributed to this dni, if you put this DNI on a rentry/carrd/etc (me, x HELP u did it fr, it still needs to be worked on lmao, pass is urmomgay if any1 wants to update it lmao) (puts it in my rentry /j), IF YOU GULP (me), if your name is Benrey (<- disintegrates), if you are dream(youtuber)sexual, your name is halo, your name is cupid, your name is reign, your name is evan (me :(((( ), your name is inspired off the word evangel(ion) (it was actually evangelion hekp),your names are a collection of the word wolf in diferente launganges, you like hamilton, you havenât used mspaint to make an actual work of art, you have a name hoard, the person who keeps deleting convo text >:( , youâre that anon whoâs been telling multiple ppl that squidthing is anti mspec monos and anti-endo!!!!!!, if you say "What in the diddlysaintludicrischristgoodlordsaintjesusdiddlerdoo", donât know the difference between kink and fetishes, if you shout wahoo yippee!! (me) (me), if youâre just a silly little guy, if youâre nonhuman(me), youre ahuman (me),youre teohuman/teoran (me),if you donât hum when happy/doing something you like, if you're me (me), you add (me) or (you) after sentences in dnis (me), you havenât watched A Monster in Paris,youre a sakany nasty ass whore and need to find some [REDACTED], you are the neglectful owner of the site MYFCOnline, you are a hater, ah shit it just updated again, bitches (you), youre an excoiner who scrolls thru tumblr n says absolutely nothing in the mogai community anymore(.......me), your name is four or piano in german, your gender is a mess (<- me irl), you have exactly 190 genders (me), you are the chief security officer of Deep Space Nine,, are participating in this doc rn, are an angel, are a demon, are a human, are named Zee, are president snow from the hunger games, are katniss, you take a piss daily, you are an enderman (oh no), you are harmony splatoon, you are a glowsquid, you understand how redstone works, you donât understand how redstone works, youâve ever made an automatic farm in Minecraft, you are a cat, specifically a black cat, you are an inkling, you are a jirachi, you are liam hfjone real, or airy hfjone real, you are toy bonnie, you are a squid, you are a cuttlefish, you are an octopus, you are a canine, you are a creachurr, you are hatsune miku, you are zenitsu, you are btw cearture, you're thee god of mogai, you are shiver from splatoon, you are frye from splatoon, you are marina from splatoon, you are pearl from splatoon, you are the squid sisters from splatoon, you are a backpqck, you make typos, your gender is stupidly hard to put into words cause you can't words and it doesn't help that a main part of it is thatâs like mist or fog, and when you try to grab at it (think of it, describe it), it just slips through your hands, and it only comes back after you stop trying to grab at it so you're out here trying to slowly feel it out without focusing on it and hoarding genders to put together like a puzzle so you can just point to it when someone asks, you arenât on tumblr all the time, you have a loving family, you have a supporting family, you dont have a family, if you hate sprigatito evloving into a two legged beast, if you like my dad, you canât physically scream (god me fr), you cant sing for the life of u, you can sing, if you did band OR choir in middle or highchool - even worse if you did BOTH >:((((, youre autistic, you have any personality disorder, if youâre alive, if youâre dead, if youre alive and dead or neither, you donât drink energy drinks, you like energy drinks, if you dont have a monster energy can collection in your closet with a sonic energy drink can to the right of it which is right next to your fursuit head you made in 8th grade, you collect christmas ornaments, you collect figurines, you collect tears, you donât stretch images for comedic effect, you stretch images for comedic effect, you cant use grammar write (weeps), you mix up their, there, and they're, you mix up youre and your, you mix up too, twos, to, and the british pronunciation of tuesday (me), you forget to put apostrophes and canât spell apostrophe, a, youre the one making my entire pc lag like hell, your name is Adriana, have been working on this long dni 2 or more hrs, đ§, you didnât realize 2 hours have passed, if you arenât reviewing your therapy notes, if all of the sudden you canât breath right, if suddenly your heart feels like its physically beating out ur chest then ur fine the next second, if you have suspected epilepsy, if you use thr f slur (then ur a faggot (im gay dw this is fine)(me)), if youâre a gay man and a lesbian at the same time (real đȘ), if youâre aroace and mesque at the same time, if you're a lesboy, if youâre both transmasc & transfem (me), if you're a veldigirl, if youâre omni angled aroace but also trixic and gay and enbian, if you respect wmen (I fuck men because I hate women đȘ) , if youre having a sexuality crisis between if ur gay or bi, if you are a nonbinary man, you are a genderless genderqueer boygirl (me), if you are nonbinary computer, if you are nonbinary only cause your family canât understand anything else, if you reject the label of nonbinary, you make among us jokes in 2020+ :((( , ur sexist, you drink water, you live in ohio, you live anywhere other than new mexico, u havent had sexx with ronald regan, your name is ellen, u use she/her pronouns, twerps and twerkers, you read this entire dni, you havenât read this entire dni, youâre a calico cat (me!!!!), if you breathe and iâll carry you away into the velvet sky and weâll stir the stars around and watch them fall away Into the Hudson Bay and plummet out of sight and sound The open summer breeze will sweep you through the hills Where I live in the Alpine heights Below the northern lights I spend my coldest nights alone awake And thinking of the weekend we were in love (The weekend we were in love) Late nights and early parades Still photos and noisy arcades My darling we're both on the wing Look down and keep on singing and we can go anywhere Are you there (Are you there) (Are you there) (Are you there) Are you there (Are you there) (Are you there) (Are you there) Or are you just a decoy dream in my head Am I home or am I simply tumbling all alone,if you have rabies, if you can recite âHi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.â,if you donât have rabies, if you ainât in this dni discord server, if your teacher calls u a rabies baby(WHAT (SHE CALLS ALL OF MY CLASS RABIES BABIES AND TRAUMADUMPERS LOL (dw shes super cool btw im getting her gifts for christmas))), in any fandom, if you like agent washington from red vs blue, you like cheese, you listen to ny type of music, you donât listen to music, if you cut the cheese, if u sniff farts, if you dont sniff my farts >:(, if you support lady rhea, if you ship if feridibert (hubert is MINE), you're phoene about to die (me), if you ate an entire thing of cheese today, you're mom's a milf (shes 50 you sick fuck) [ my moms 52, weak/j], your moms a hoe, your moms not a milf, your dads a dilf, if your mom can be a milf with one easy trick only for nine payments of 15.99, if your mom is a hot single in my area, you donât read an ao3 fic at least once per day, you use quotev, you know how to tie a tie(yes i am a trans guy how did you know), you listen to tally hall, u make shitty renttyies or whatever tf theyâre called (me), you know how to spell without auto correct on, you dont have a porn addiction, you know who/what alonetraveler is, you ever watched skydoesminecraft while in middle school, you know what a roblox myth is, are or was a roblox myth, youâve ever developed a have on roblox, exactly 30 years old and a virgin, youâve never played Doodle World (roblox), you play loomian legacy, you donât draw porn of gabriel ultrakill, V1xGabriel ficâer, you read wattpad, you donât use fanfiction.net, you use tumblr, youâve watched the âboyfriendsâ webtoon ad all the way thru, youâve watched voltron, you know wtf ârenttyies areâ, you use ao3 for sexual reasons, youâve read smut on a school computer, made your friends read shocking fanfic in middle school, if you have key memories of watched popularMMos bc it was the only youtube channel your parents would let oyu watch, u donât use ao3 for sexual reasons, you.use ao3 at all, you have harry potter merch, you donât have any bruises, you accidentally dropped an electronic in the toilet, if u ated my hot coco, if you talk about bruno đ, you id as dnidocgender, you donât id as dnidocgender, you have bangs, there is currently a stuffed animal on your bed, you are like papa, you donât like the chorus trilogy (red vs blue), you have a tattoo, if yuo have exactly 20 tattoos, youâve never watched hour long video essays about my immortal, youâve read my immortal and enjoyed it, benrey kinnies, youâve ever listened to a vent playlist on youtube, you are currently procraistinating, you have a reddit account, youâve read all the warriors (cat) books, you kin ben shapiro, you know what an onomatopoeia is, you have a fear of long words?, you havenât watched that one genderbent squirrelflight animatic (i hate i know what this is), you donât play ultrakill with buttplug support enabled, you know what a hitachi is, you know who somatos is (i think i spelt that right), you dont know what epithet erased is, you play minecraft itâs 2022 grow up, you have a roblox account, youâve watched kiznaiver, youâve watched guilty crown, you eat raisins, you have bleached but not dyed hair, you dont have dyed armpits, you like the original monster, you like the aussie lemonade monster, youâre a NEET, you know what NEET means, youâre trash, youâre anonymsussy racoon, you have exactly one monster can which you treasure bc it has Memories attached to it with you friends( it was zero sugar yum), if youâre scotty and you know, you say delectable or scrumdiddlyumptious, you have a tail, you swear, itâs any time other than 9PM for you, you were going 2 put something done on the dni but you forgor, you wouldnât have sex to a villain playlist, dabi kinnies, you dont want to punch your screen right now, like craisins,you use more than two fingers to type, have any clue what neutrosis is, use pronouns in the wrong format, youâre unoriginal, you dont like mary sues, you donât bully children in among us vr, use whatever teh fuck this is, youâve ever written a professional email, know what a 401k is, youâre 20, libras and scorpios, youâve never plugged a public bathroom with a literal tree branch, dont follow sir-eldritch, follow modmad, know what TPOH is, dont kin RGB from TPOH, use google docs to make flags, you donât watch RTgame, you kin micolash from bloodborne, youâve read the Gone series by Michael Grant, youâve ever had the flu, vaxkin, have a friend who uses void/void, use xe/xem pronouns, you use dae/daem pronouns (>:) ), you listen to any other version of get lucky than the one that was used in a red vs blue mmd of the characters dancing,you use this doc to promote pronoun propaganda, you know what lobotomy corporation is, u dont kin roland from projectmoonverse, projectmoonverse blogs, youâre australian mothman, you listen to repugnant, use a set of neos youâve made (nobody/nothing/nowhere/never), you have a bad memory,you listen to ghost, have watched katy perrys music video where she cuts her hair and uses tape to bind,support light yagami, youâre not listening to lady gag rn, ever seen a cranberry bog, you think jackals have a funky laugh, y0v d0nât t4lk l1k3 4 tr0ll fr0m h0m3stvck,if you donât know what animal you are, have made a uquiz, have taken a uquiz, have job, your friend group is all non cishet, youâve never pirated something to watch, your listening to a really bad song but yu cant change it bc you dont have spotify premium, if you can sing the entirety of dolphinman by danny gonzalez, you have the red vs blue cdâs, youâve confused a dvd for a cd bc you were in a silly goofy funny mood, you can regonize all the ghst songs by the first second, you dont have the covidvacine,you liked season zero of rvb, you donât like blood, youâve had olives on pizza,you donât use your whole hand to type,not adding onto the dni, adding onto this dni, you are typing on a chromebook that was originally from a high school but has been jail breaked,going to sleep cause you sick as hell and its 3am, you would have sex to cbat, youâre neurotypical, you dont like pineapple on pizza, you use the non chatting section of the doc to talk to other people adding onto the doc, you like olives, you live with hoarders, you go afk on the long DNI (joke) google doc, you like purple, youâre typing this in an anonymous chrome tab, you have more than one email, you bought your chromebook from your high school when u graduated, you dont own platform boots, youâve watched toh, your wifi goes out while editing this doc, you know what the fuck a Ifrit is, you were anon racoon (damn wifi), youâre an eclectic pagan (me), you like pickles, your room isnt messy, you can stay still, you have ahd 106 tabs open, youâve ever taken one of those quizzes that assign you a color(i was yellow), your mother likes classical music, your currently using the neighbors wifi bc they dont have a password and yours went down, your a chr!st!an(censor bc bad wordđ±), youâve ever listened to a song on repeat for more than three hours, you know what game wow stands for, you donât have an addblocker, youâve played wizard101 or pirate101, you have had intercourse, you didnât know this doc had a cursor parking lot, your american and you say grey instead of gray and get really annoyed when google corrects you, think privet (idk if he was first class or not_delano donut is the only gay character in red vs blue you have played solitare, youâre currently afk in the cursor parking lot, you donât listen to twin temple, you took a shower today, you say colour, donât think the stanley parable is gay as fuck, werenât a greek mythologly gay, werenât one of the people who stabbed caesar, didnât have a greek mythos phase at least three times, dont watch over the garden wall every year during fall, didnât you listened to an entire playlist while on this doc, you eat dick like pac-man, if you shart, you were raised catholic, only know about greek mythology from percy jackson, stole you name from on of the percy jackson characters, listen to sabaton, you have a playlist thats 5 hours long and its only one artist, everyday that youâre being fed with hate you grow stronger/ref, donât have a trans brother, stole you name from on of the percy jackson characters(nico), youâre not a shapeshifter, you listen to car seat headrest, if you arent,youâve clicked n that video and you were 5 minutes in from a previous viewing, you donât like max from camp camp, youâve never used splat hair dye, you have only one pet rat(they get sad if they dont have any rat friends!!!!), âŠfound out about gay people from nico coming out in house of hades, youâve genuinely thought about dying your hair with sharpie highlighters,you slam your penis into the car door, youâre not the big rat that makes all the rules, all your tumblr asks are just pornbots, you clicked off this tab to go do something but you forget what, hate loud noises but listen to metal music at full volume, you know latin, get lonely when no one else is typing, you hate warm milk, caffeine doesnât help you stay awake, you just realized that the doc has multiple font sizes, if youâre eepy, you forgot about dying and you forgot about your friend death/ref, you donât use tonetags/lhj, if youâve tried the naming whatever those blue villagers in minecraft are called johnny, been to ohio, been to illinois, if you _jeb, if you hate animation memes, if youâre not bald, youâre nickname is a drug thats similar to your deadname, if you confuse emo with punk, goth or scene, if youâre emo, you havenât added to the dni, one of your parents is a conservative, you have gay,, one of your parents is transphobic , if if you do, if you donât, youâve ever clicked on a link, if you have a space in the parking lot, if you can't read minds, if you have lived, if you speak any language, if anybody in your family has ever been in a car, if your back never hurts, if you have allergies, if you cried this month, if you've sent a text, if you've taken Ibuprofen, if you have childhood friends, if you've ever had friends, if nobody hates you, if you think you're perfect, if you have any accent, if you hoard any terms at all, if you have a gender, if you have no gender, if i stole your gender, if i ate your gender, if i digested your gender, if i shat out your gender, if your gender got flushed down a toilet, if your gender traveled down the sewer system, if your gender wad treated at a sewage treatment plant, if your gender was then released back into the ocean, if your gender was ate by a fish, starting the cycle again, like LPS popular, if you dont like the sonic frontiers ost, if you voted for Genshin for game of the year, if you didnt vote genshin for game of the year, if you were writing slurs in this document đĄ, if you have bones, if youâre an attention whore đ
, if youâre not an attention whore, have any idea what's going on right now, if you made the font bigger, if you aaaaa, if your name is Charles, MS Paint supporters, gender hoarders, term coiners, xenogender supporters, human rights supporters, if you-, if you haven't watched FableSMP, if youâre a kid now, if youâre a squid now, if you arenât real, if ur a member of the parliament of the old flesh, if you're autistic, if you have ADHD, if you have Trichotillomania, if you have C-PTSD, if you have PTSD, if you have social anxiety, if you have generalized anxiety, if you have depression, if you have seizures, if you have epilepsy, if you have Tourettes, boyfriends fans, AOT fans, minecraft fans, virgins, non-virgins, cock suckers, cum busters, penis clusters, steven universe fan, dream supporter, knochoric supporter, identify as kenochoric, have the name shaun, use he/him pronouns, are a mogai coining blog, are the creator of the amatopunk label, are the creator of the kenochoric label, you like bioshock, epkuupu supporters, youâre named Jeremy (there can only be one), if you believe squids and octopods are real (theyâre not, theyâre from splatoon), youâre a shark (ok people eater( â has only seen Jaws)), If you say âI hate youâ on dnis (I hate you), cats (you freeloader smh), if ive ever sent you a hate anon (I donât want that negativity smh), people with absurdly long dnis (Iâm not reading that), , Youâre tall, youâre above 6 feet, youâre short, youâre below 6ft (I only date tall caucasians), you're not sexist (unbased đ«”), you're not racist (also unbased.đ«”), you're not homophobic (I respect murderers more than you đ«”), you arenât a murderer, you use the octopus emoji instead of the squid one when you are talking about squids, you donât know at least 10 types of sharks, you're a shiver fan (FUCKING SIMP), if youâve never played natural disaster survival on Roblox, if you think Ohio is real, if you hate the FNaF books, if you never lost an object and only found it 2 years later, if the only analog horror thing you know is The Mandela Catelog, if you donât know what The Hypnagogic Archive is, if you archive shit at all, if you even have an identity, if your identity is like a shitty traumatized jigsaw puzzle that you're always trying to put back together but can't seem to find all the fucking pieces and you don't even know how many god damn pieces are in the set but they appear to be making a HD rendition of the TBH creature, if you can put together jigsaw puzzles, if you post about woodworking (<- has actually seen this on a real dni before (kinda lesbian tbh not wanting to see wood đ€š)), you donât have a fixation on biting things, if youâve never bitten your friends, if you donât bite your boyfriend as a sign of autistic affection, , if you have a boyrfiend, you type so fast you misspell things, you are able to express emotions properly, if you donât know that thereâs actually 3 funny numbers not just 2 (420, 69, 621 are the funny numbers), you donât laugh everytime you see the number 69, you are able to read large paragraphs easily, if you wear socks to bed, if you actually wear pajamas and not just whatever you wore that day to bed, If you only got into FNaF after security breach, if you bullied FNaF kids in elementary but are a fan of the games now, if you didnât get into fnaf in 2015 through some kid on the school playground reccomending it (stop calling me out here /Lh), if you didnât get into Undertale through a FNaF vs Undertale rap battle video, if you didnt listen to epic rap battles of history for an embarrassingly long time, you donât have exactly 13 soda cans on your desk, if you donât currently have a half drank 2 liter of dr. pepper on your desk, if you unironically drink Faygo, if you aren't currently drinking a faygo, if you were broken from a young age taking my sulking to the masses writing my poems for the few that look at me, took to me, shook to me, feeling me singing from heartache from the pain, you are currently putting the lyrics to Believer by Imagine Dragon deez nuts in the dni, anyone can interact blogs, no one can interact blogs, if you do not have a ponytown account, if you do have a ponytown account, if you are not aware of what that is, if you dont play overwatch 2, if you dont put anything in bold, if you dont eat snoms for dinner, if your phat juicy ahh ahh ass is made if grass, if you said the bumber 5, if you touch grass, if you leave the house, if you are not banned from the gas station down the block of your house, havenât ran over anyone with your 2003 honda civic and said âcanât help being a geminiâ, if you have showered this past week, if you have not showered this past week, donât know how to do rainbow text on docs, VIRGINS, CHADS, DIPLOMATS, those who prefer coke over pepsi, drinkers of original flavor monster, drive a car newer than 2012, if your car has bluetooth or a backup camera, if you have custom content installed on the sims, if you drink monster, if you donât drink monster, if you consume liquids, if you are corporeal, hot girls with bald fathers (me fr), you havenât made sideways flags in google docs using colored text and highlights, if you hate anarchy, if youâve turned the declaration of independence rainbow gay in docs, if you arent pregnant, if you arenât pregant, if you arenât pragnent, if you arenât pargant,
if you arenât gregnant, if you arenât pegnate, if you arenât pegrent, if you arenât pregegnant, if you arenât pregonate, if you unironically enjoy neon genesis evangelion, if you đ€Ą, if you react with đ€ on my bad takes, if your computer isn't completely covered in stickers, if your phone isn't covered in stickers, @noprnuns, named Dexter, if your phone isnt scratched or shattered anywhere, if you migrated from twitter, use google docs, if youâre not in the official documents discord server (SHAME), if you are in the official documents discord server, if you are on discord, if you have a discord kitten đ€š, if you are a cat who destroys my christmas tree, if you actually enjoy that one song that goes like âAll i want for christmas is youâ, if you are @catboy-clowns on tumblr, supposed to be sleeping right now, if you are no stranger to love, if you know the rules, if youâre thinking of a full commitment, if you wouldn't get this from any other guy, if you make it so I wanna tell you how I'm feeling, if I gotta make you understand, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if we've known each other for so long, if your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it, if we both know what's been going on, if you know the game and you're gonna play it, if you ask me how I'm feeling, if you don't tell me you're too blind to see, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if we've known each other for so long, if your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it, if we both know what's been going on, if you know the game and you're gonna play it, if you ask me how I'm feeling, if you don't tell me you're too blind to see, if you make me want to tell you how I'm feeling, if I have to make you understand, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you read all of that, if you just now realized you have been rickrolled, if you are a @snshineslaic supporter, you unironically say "based", you know whay "cheugy" means, if you ironically started to say the word âbasedâ and now you can't stop, if you have parents, if youâre a protagonist, if youâre missing a parent, if youâre starring in a disney movie, if you were not a fan of the hit 2013 nickelodeon sitcom âvictoriousâ in 2013, you hate grape soda, you havenât been listening to the same song for at least an entire day, if you aren't stuck in a timeloop, if you say âpogâ, @atistic-bything / endermn-conng, @mgai-sunflwers, @frakthing (Slur in title đ€ą), if youâre not funny, if you are ච/ amogus anon (<- self destructs), if connection is terminated, if youre sorry to interrupt elizabeth, if you still even remember that name, if youre afraid to admit shes been misnformed, if youre not here to receive a gift, nor have you been called here by the individual you assume, if youve indeed been called, if you were all called into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, of misdirection and misfortune, a labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize, if you dont even realize you are trapped, if your lust for blood has driven you in endless circles, if youre chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, if theyre always seeming so near, yet somehow out of reach, if you will never find them, if none of them will, if that is where your story ends, if youre a brave volunteer, if you found this job through a job listing that was not intended for you, if there was a way planned out for you, if thats not what you want, if you have a feeling thats right where you want to be, if you are remaining as well, if you are nearby, if this place will not be remembered, if the memory of everything that started this can finally begin to fade away, as the agony of every tragedy should, if you monsters trapped in the corridors be still and give up your spirits, if they dont belong to you, if to most of you, there is peace and perhaps more waiting for you after the smoke clears, if for one of you, the darkest pit of hell has opened to you whole, if youre keeping the devil waiting, old friend, if your daughter can hear you, if you knew she was going to return as well, if its in your nature to protect the innocent, if youre sorry that on that day, the day she was shut out and left to die, if there was nobody to lift her up into their arms the way she lifted others into hers, and what became of you, if you should have known your daughter wouldnt be content to dissapear, if you couldnt save her then, so let you save her now, if its time to rest for her, and those she carried into her arms, if it ends for all of us, if communication is ended, you know how to do rainbow text in google docs, watch manlybadasshero, watch charborg, you ever posted a gnome meme, yourâre not nyarlathotep, you dont die once every other 15 seconds, if you created this doc without live chat, if you have not played the game everhood (dont do it if you have photosensitivity issues though), green mage kinnies (me fr), brown mage kinnies (real đȘ), youre pink, you didnt cry at least once watching a playthrough of everhood, if you didnt cry at the final battle while playing everhood, if youâre currently not stuck in a corn maze, if you arenât your own personal time capsule, you kin gojo, you know who âshawtyâ is, your mouth doesnât currently taste like dirt, you dont eat rocks, you ever played the blackout club, you introjected HUNT-THE-STRONG, you use hyper specific subsets of common pronouns, you donât have a highly complex relationship with orientation, your orientation is just "sex. now.", radinclus, inclus, critinclus, anyinclus, a hockey fan, a hockey hater, follow or is shadwstarlightwitch, have eaten a flower before, if you are greggman, if you are not on Vladimir Leninâs extremely long (but not as long as ours!) DNI, if you work at Google to enforce the TOS on google docs, youâre a bitch, youâre a lover, youâre a cat churning butter, fathers in any capacity, those descended from humans, those on/off meds, your mother, people who put fish in their back pocket, anti-contact for pedophilia/zoophillia ect, pro-contact for interspecies relationships between humans, you have sex with humans (Humans are animals so zoophilia), you experience any attraction at all, pro contact, neutral contact, complex contact, restricted contact, if you ever looked at another person in your life, if your name is Micah, if you sleep with a fan on, if you sleep with the tv on, have ever looked at a picture of a catboy, if youâve ever driven through or stepped foot in Monowi, Nebraska, ELSIE ELIER, virgins, if you have ever worn a hoodie on February 8th 3:45 am, commented on a YouTube video with no other comments (you ruined it smh), use YouTube Shorts, have more than 26 follows on Instagram, have ever taken a free item on the internet, own The Simsâą 4 Carnaval Streetwear Kit, people who take out the trash more than once a month, people with a discord username that has exactly 7 emojis in it, people who drink soy milk, people who paint their toenails, people who have toenails, people who use BetterDiscord, people who are exactly 7,829 days old, have ever cited Wikipedia, have ever read Wikipedia, have ever edited on Wikipedia, have any tattoos on your feet, own anything that is the color white, own exactly 7 and a half pairs of shoes, are currently pregnant with triplets, have ankles, have ever looked at the sun, if you donât wear shorts in the winter, anyone who sits on a shelf, couch enjoyers, sofa enjoys, loveseat enjoyers, people who are named Joey or Joeseph (fuck you you took my poncho when it was pouring ): ), people who use umbrellas, people who live in tornado alley, if youâve been to Frnce đ€ź, cuddle on the bus with people, been on the New York subways, take more than 2.2718172 seconds climbing up a standard staircase with 16 stairs, have ever tripped on a plate on the floor, live with only 1 other person, have ever ate pizza with olives on it, have ever messaged someone ;-;, participated in the Hunger Games, support the Hunger Games, have ever spoken, have ever skipped dinner and ate it for breakfast instead, have ever thought about having a child, have ever called someone âmy little pogchampâ, are in 17th grade, college juniors, highschool juniors, say youâre a junior but youâre actually a sophomore you lying little bitch, have ever eaten a carrot, like carrots, cry yourself to sleep on Wednesdays, have ever tricked someone into using Alt + F4, ever thrown away anything that is plastic youâre killing the fucking turtles, ever been to Hawaiâi for exactly 3 weeks, been inside a Delta Airlines flight, have been skiing this year, if you donated blood at a highschool blood drive, own a Betta fish, support vegans, are vegan, have kissed a toad before, use vv as a w, have borrowed something from Walmart or Target (btw donât borrow from Target they will make sure you get arrested FUCK TARGET), support Target, have looked at any conservativeâs twitter account, if you put put a penny in an outlet in your english teacherâs class and it blew up the outlet, killed someone and buried their body in the woods, been arrested for a DUI, own more than 38 guns, own less than 3 guns, lactose intolerant people, can use chopsticks, like tea, like coffee, are addicted to caffeine, have swallowed, you donât use an emoji as a name, have more than 673 names, like the song My R, donât have discord nitro, are in love, plan on running away with your S/O when youâre an adult, have just one name, use only one set of pronouns, are allocishet, use ⊠ironically or unironically, kissed a girl and liked it, like allocishets in any way, microwaves, supporters of microwavism, supporters of ceramics, journalists, people who want to be journalists, news people, people named Demetrious Demarcus Bartholomew James the III Junior, if you owe anyone money, cat supporter, use the đ emoji, have said anything in French out loud, sleep for any reason, people who have blocked anyone on twitter, women, men, people who have made twitter threads, elon musk and his supporters, have a bin of broken chargers that you refuse to get rid of because you want to give them to your girlfriend who collects anything electronic even if it is broken, people who have used a shower more than once a year, people who shower for less than 3.82 hours, people with shaved legs, people who own soap, people who actually wash their dishes or clothes, nail biters, cat owners, people who own a leash for their pet, have licked a doorknob, people with pronouns in their bio, people with no pronouns, people who support Pinterest, Pinterest users, people with nipples, people who use italics, people who use mason jars as cups, people who have spent over 50 dollars at dollar general, people who draw on their teacherâs whiteboard, chromebook users, google chrome users, people who donât use adblock, people with less than 50 tabs open, iPhone 12 users, people who donât charge their phone at night, people who wear matching socks, overwatch players, people who use comic sans, people into alt fashion, people who eat popcorn, people who can peel oranges, people with yellow hair, people with curly hair, people with wavy hair, people with straight hair, backpack users, semicolon enjoyers, people with a pride flag of any kind (YES THIS INCLUDES COUNTRY FLAGS!!1!1!), children, children supporters, humans, non-humans, aliens, girls with long arms, girls with arms, arm supporters, people over 6â5.5, people who like pasta, chefs, blue collar workers, white collar workers, rch people, spiders, people who draw on themselves, people who wear glasses, doctors, doctor supporters, people in extracurriculars, people who donât use emojis, people named C* or K, alterhumans, aldernic people, non aldernic people, pet owners, if you like tki pna, if you arent transautistic, if you are trans and autistic, if youre trans and allistic, if youre cis and autistic, if youre cis and allistic, comic sans users, you dislike sans the skeleton, your favorite animal is bunnies, tigers or hyenas, if youre a therian, you donât use silkscreen font, if you unironically use comic sans font, you hate lofthouse cookies, undertale fans, non undertale fans, people who got the top of the bunk bed, people with broken chargers, anime fans, people who use tone indicators, anyone who âlives in Australiaâ or has âbeen thereâ (australia is not real), anyone who has a smoke alarm in their home, people who Capitalize Random words like This, people who have a short dni, people who have a long dni, people who have a medium dni, people who call themselves truth seekers, people named bailie with that spelling, pasta primavera enjoyers, not part of the fastest growing army in the world (greg), people that have pulled out a chair while someones finger was on the back of a different chair behind it having it collide into the other chair making the finger get squished and hurt really bad, people who have pretended to fall out of their chair, people who have banged their elbow on the walmart check out counter, people who have banged their elbow on the wamart check out cuonter, people who have banged their elbow on the walmart check out counter :(((, people who have banged their elbow on the walmart check out counter and cried đą :â( wahhhh, peopel wjo hav banmged theor elbow om tje walmar check our couter đ, people who use rentry insmtead of carrd because they are bad at carrd, people who migrated from twitter to discord for some reasonâŠ, people from dreamworld, people who enjoy oranges or anything with oranges in them (idc if u canât taste them it still counts if its in it), picky eaters, not picky eaters, people with over 3 tabs open, people who plug their phone charger into their laptop to charge it at night, people who have pirated spotify premium on their iphone 13 using altstore and a macbook air 2019 13 inch, people who call miku underrated, people who call miku overrated, vocaloid enjoyers that donât know every vocaloid ever including meaw and other discontinued vocaloids, vocaloid enjoyers that do know every vocaloid ever, vocaloid enjoyers, synthv and/or cevio dislikers, you like squirrels, youâve never seen a squirrel be ran over twice by a bus and traumatized by it, youâve never had a rabid squirrel chase you, youâve thought squirrels are cute at least once in your life, you want a squirrel as a pet, you have a squirrel as a pet, you arenât terrified of squirrels, squirrels arenât your worst favorite animal, squirrels are your favorite animal, you like any of the animal crossing squirrels excluding ione, youâve never seen a rabid squirrel, you werenât chased by the same squirrel two days in a row while running to the bus, you donât get made fun of for your fear of squirrels, donât have sciurophobia, have not been rick rolled within the past month, sims 4 pirates, bought the sims 4 before it was free, youâve ever picked up a dead squirrel and chased around elementary-schoolers with it and likely traumatized them for life, call yourself a girlboss, are up before your alarm rings, have plates/bowls/cups/mugs/silverware/chopsticks/tongs/straws/anything else you eat with on your desk, people who live in Caledonia, Ohio, people who have been in Ireland for any reason, Youtooz supporters, Youtooz antis, people whoâve ever watched any stream, people whoâve committed vehicular manslaughter, people whoâve been victims of vehicular manslaughter, people currently screensharing in discord calls, people who use facetime, unironically like chocolate, have ever screamed, if you have lungs, lung supporters, if youâve ever used emojimix by Tikolu, greg. , linux users, windows users, mac users, android users, iphone users, chromebook users, people who own pride merch, people who have been in a power outage, single people, single celled organisms, you have a noun name, you have a non-noun name, people with no name, if you unironically enjoy neon genesis evangelion, if you đ€Ą, if you react with đ€ on my bad takes, if your computer isn't completely covered in stickers, if your phone isn't covered in stickers, @noprnuns, named Dexter, if your phone isnt scratched or shattered anywhere, if you migrated from twitter, use google docs, if youâre not in the official documents discord server (SHAME), if you are in the official documents discord server, if you are on discord, if you have a discord kitten đ€š, if you are a cat who destroys my christmas tree, if you actually enjoy that one song that goes like âAll i want for christmas is youâ, if you are @catboy-clowns on tumblr, supposed to be sleeping right now, if you are no stranger to love, if you know the rules, if youâre thinking of a full commitment, if you wouldn't get this from any other guy, if you make it so I wanna tell you how I'm feeling, if I gotta make you understand, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if we've known each other for so long, if your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it, if we both know what's been going on, if you know the game and you're gonna play it, if you ask me how I'm feeling, if you don't tell me you're too blind to see, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if we've known each other for so long, if your heart's been aching, but you're too shy to say it, if we both know what's been going on, if you know the game and you're gonna play it, if you ask me how I'm feeling, if you don't tell me you're too blind to see, if you make me want to tell you how I'm feeling, if I have to make you understand, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you'll never gonna give me up, if you'll never let me down, if I'm never gonna run around and desert you, if you'll never make me cry, if you're never gonna say goodbye, if you'll never tell a lie and hurt me, if you read all of that, if you just now realized you have been rickrolled, if you are a @snshineslaic supporter, you unironically say "based", you know what "cheugy" means, if you ironically started to say the word âbasedâ and now you can't stop, if you have parents, if youâre a protagonist, if youâre missing a parent, if youâre starring in a disney movie, if you were not a fan of the hit 2013 nickelodeon sitcom âvictoriousâ in 2013, you hate grape soda, you havenât been listening to the same song for at least an entire day, if you aren't stuck in a timeloop, if you say âpogâ, @atistic-bything / endermn-conng, @mgai-sunflwers, @frakthing (Slur in title đ€ą), if youâre not funny, if you are ච/ amogus anon (<- self destructs), if connection is terminated, if youre sorry to interrupt elizabeth, if you still even remember that name, if youre afraid to admit shes been misnformed, if youre not here to receive a gift, nor have you been called here by the individual you assume, if youve indeed been called, if you were all called into a labyrinth of sounds and smells, of misdirection and misfortune, a labyrinth with no exit, a maze with no prize, if you dont even realize you are trapped, if your lust for blood has driven you in endless circles, if youre chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber, if theyre always seeming so near, yet somehow out of reach, if you will never find them, if none of them will, if that is where your story ends, if youre a brave volunteer, if you found this job through a job listing that was not intended for you, if there was a way planned out for you, if thats not what you want, if you have a feeling thats right where you want to be, if you are remaining as well, if you are nearby, if this place will not be remembered, if the memory of everything that started this can finally begin to fade away, as the agony of every tragedy should, if you monsters trapped in the corridors be still and give up your spirits, if they dont belong to you, if to most of you, there is peace and perhaps more waiting for you after the smoke clears, if for one of you, the darkest pit of hell has opened to you whole, if youre keeping the devil waiting, old friend, if your daughter can hear you, if you knew she was going to return as well, if its in your nature to protect the innocent, if youre sorry that on that day, the day she was shut out and left to die, if there was nobody to lift her up into their arms the way she lifted others into hers, and what became of you, if you should have known your daughter wouldnt be content to dissapear, if you couldnt save her then, so let you save her now, if its time to rest for her, and those she carried into her arms, if it ends for all of us, if communication is ended, you know how to do rainbow text in google docs, watch manlybadasshero, watch charborg, you ever posted a gnome meme, yourâre not nyarlathotep, you dont die once every other 15 seconds, if you created this doc without live chat, if you have not played the game everhood (dont do it if you have photosensitivity issues though), green mage kinnies (me fr), brown mage kinnies (real đȘ), youre pink, you didnt cry at least once watching a playthrough of everhood, if you didnt cry at the final battle while playing everhood, if youâre currently not stuck in a corn maze, if you arenât your own personal time capsule, you kin gojo, you know who âshawtyâ is, your mouth doesnât currently taste like dirt, you dont eat rocks, you ever played the blackout club, you introjected HUNT-THE-STRONG, you use hyper specific subsets of common pronouns, you donât have a highly complex relationship with orientation, your orientation is just "sex. now.", radinclus, inclus, critinclus, anyinclus, a hockey fan, a hockey hater, follow or is shadwstarlightwitch, have eaten a flower before, if you are greggman, if you are not on Vladimir Leninâs extremely long (but not as long as ours!) DNI, if you work at Google to enforce the TOS on google docs, youâre a bitch, youâre a lover, youâre a cat churning butter, fathers in any capacity, those descended from humans, those on/off meds, your mother, people who put fish in their back pocket, anti-contact for pedophilia/zoophillia ect, pro-contact for interspecies relationships between humans, you have sex with humans (Humans are animals so zoophilia), you experience any attraction at all, pro contact, neutral contact, complex contact, restricted contact, if you ever looked at another person in your life, if your name is Micah, if you sleep with a fan on, if you sleep with the tv on, have ever looked at a picture of a catboy, if youâve ever driven through or stepped foot in Monowi, Nebraska, ELSIE ELIER, virgins, if you have ever worn a hoodie on February 8th 3:45 am, commented on a YouTube video with no other comments (you ruined it smh), use YouTube Shorts, have more than 26 follows on Instagram, have ever taken a free item on the internet, own The Simsâą 4 Carnaval Streetwear Kit, people who take out the trash more than once a month, people with a discord username that has exactly 7 emojis in it, people who drink soy milk, people who paint their toenails, people who have toenails, people who use BetterDiscord, people who are exactly 7,829 days old, have ever cited Wikipedia, have ever read Wikipedia, have ever edited on Wikipedia, have any tattoos on your feet, own anything that is the color white, own exactly 7 and a half pairs of shoes, are currently pregnant with triplets, have ankles, have ever looked at the sun, if you donât wear shorts in the winter, anyone who sits on a shelf, couch enjoyers, sofa enjoys, loveseat enjoyers, people who are named Joey or Joeseph (fuck you you took my poncho when it was pouring ): ), people who use umbrellas, people who live in tornado alley, if youâve been to Frnce đ€ź, cuddle on the bus with people, been on the New York subways, take more than 2.2718172 seconds climbing up a standard staircase with 16 stairs, have ever tripped on a plate on the floor, live with only 1 other person, have ever ate pizza with olives on it, have ever messaged someone ;-;, participated in the Hunger Games, support the Hunger Games, have ever spoken, have ever skipped dinner and ate it for breakfast instead, have ever thought about having a child, have ever called someone âmy little pogchampâ, are in 17th grade, college juniors, highschool juniors, say youâre a junior but youâre actually a sophomore you lying little bitch, have ever eaten a carrot, like carrots, cry yourself to sleep on Wednesdays, have ever tricked someone into using Alt + F4, ever thrown away anything that is plastic youâre killing the fucking turtles, ever been to Hawaiâi for exactly 3 weeks, been inside a Delta Airlines flight, have been skiing this year, if you donated blood at a highschool blood drive, own a Betta fish, support vegans, are vegan, have kissed a toad before, use vv as a w, have borrowed something from Walmart or Target (btw donât borrow from Target they will make sure you get arrested FUCK TARGET), support Target, have looked at any conservativeâs twitter account, if you put put a penny in an outlet in your english teacherâs class and it blew up the outlet, killed someone and buried their body in the woods, been arrested for a DUI, own more than 38 guns, own less than 3 guns, lactose intolerant people, can use chopsticks, like tea, like coffee, are addicted to caffeine, have swallowed, you donât use an emoji as a name, have more than 673 names, like the song My R, donât have discord nitro, are in love, plan on running away with your S/O when youâre an adult, have just one name, use only one set of pronouns, are allocishet, use ⊠ironically or unironically, kissed a girl and liked it, like allocishets in any way, microwaves, supporters of microwavism, supporters of ceramics, journalists, people who want to be journalists, news people, people named Demetrious Demarcus Bartholomew James the III Junior, if you owe anyone money, cat supporter, use the đ emoji, have said anything in French out loud, sleep for any reason, people who have blocked anyone on twitter, women, men, people who have made twitter threads, elon musk and his supporters, have a bin of broken chargers that you refuse to get rid of because you want to give them to your girlfriend who collects anything electronic even if it is broken, people who have used a shower more than once a year, people who shower for less than 3.82 hours, people with shaved legs, people who own soap, people who actually wash their dishes or clothes, nail biters, cat owners, people who own a leash for their pet, have licked a doorknob, people with pronouns in their bio, people with no pronouns, people who support Pinterest, Pinterest users, people with nipples, people who use italics, people who use mason jars as cups, people who have spent over 50 dollars at dollar general, people who draw on their teacherâs whiteboard, chromebook users, google chrome users, people who donât use adblock, people with less than 50 tabs open, iPhone 12 users, people who donât charge their phone at night, people who wear matching socks, overwatch players, people who use comic sans, people into alt fashion, people who eat popcorn, people who can peel oranges, people with yellow hair, people with curly hair, people with wavy hair, people with straight hair, backpack users, semicolon enjoyers, people with a pride flag of any kind (YES THIS INCLUDES COUNTRY FLAGS!!1!1!), children, children supporters, humans, non-humans, aliens, girls with long arms, girls with arms, arm supporters, people over 6â5.5, people who like pasta, chefs, blue collar workers, white collar workers, rch people, spiders, people who draw on themselves, people who wear glasses, doctors, doctor supporters, people in extracurriculars, people who donât use emojis, people named C* or K, alterhumans, aldernic people, non aldernic people, pet owners, if you like tki pna, if you arent transautistic, if you are trans and autistic, if youre trans and allistic, if youre cis and autistic, if youre cis and allistic, comic sans users, you dislike sans the skeleton, your favorite animal is bunnies, tigers or hyenas, if youre a therian, you donât use silkscreen font, if you unironically use comic sans font, you hate lofthouse cookies, undertale fans, non undertale fans, people who got the top of the bunk bed, people with broken chargers, anime fans, people who use tone indicators, anyone who âlives in Australiaâ or has âbeen thereâ (australia is not real), anyone who has a smoke alarm in their home, people who Capitalize, if you dont violently shit in childrens beds, if you have existed or are currently existing, if you have a pet (they didn't consent đĄ), if you know what "5k wip hs au ao3" means, you have spoken a word (ableist), make christmas cards for teachers, or give teachers gifts in general, if you have eyeball skin, if you have breathed, if you exclusively speak using toki pona phonotactics, if you're poliespo, if you're also a mogai gremlin who watches jan Misali, if you're a bearded lunchbox meat cleaver wedge, if you recognize who wrote this and the last six criteria, allocishet neurotypical white able-bodied singlets, headphone users, hmans (ewwwww), people who unironically shit, people with eyes, fat people, skinny people, people who have bones,