The Bayou Infants Go to an Amusement Park
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 | "Alright lame-o's, check this shit." Jack's got some sort of scheme again. Here we go. I lean back in the lunchroom chair and hang an arm over the back of the seat, ready to see how this is going to spectacularly blow up, as usual.
A blue hand slaps onto the lunch table, paper in it. I tilt my head and glance at what he's roughly assaulting the table with. Seems I'm not the only one curious. Or the only one ready to see this blow up.
Iris lets out a frustrated puff as she speaks, "Jack, can you just go one day without starting something? You have to be tired at this point, right?"
Jo and E chime in, Joseph first. "Aw, c'mon, Iris. Let the guy maim himself if he wants. Or embarrass himself or-" Josephine then takes over.
"-blow his allowance or-" and now in tandem they speak "-get himself killed."
Both nod as Jack slaps the table again, other hand now planted firmly. "Shut it! Look at these bad boys. Won 'em in a raffle." The little pieces of paper are picked up, five in total, blue and black ink marks on them. Tickets of some kind. Interesting. I fold my arms and lean forward to peer at the things, trying to squint and make out the markings as the things are waved around.
"What is it this time? And you? Winning something? Did no one else enter?" Iris points a finger at him smirking as she teases. Jack, the wall of ego he is, manages to ignore her and talk about his bounty through snickers.
"Online raffle. Had to submit a drawing. Think I might be an artist along with an athlete. Like those old Greek philistines." The smug bary puts on his best grin and leans back, flexing slightly.
"Philosophers." Iris corrects, rolling her eyes and reaching over to inspect the tickets, dragging them closer so that I can get my eyes on the suckers, too. Oh they're for that amusement park in the south part of town, Stenopelix Flags, think it's called.
Jo rubs his chin, "Hey wait wasn't that contest for like-"
"-Eight-year-olds?" E concludes, getting her phone out. A scoff from the brother.
"Pretty sure it's six-year-olds, E."
"Eight."
"Six." And off they go into their own little spat while Jack just ignores them, turning to face Iris and I while the Jo's do their usual play and turn some benign argument into a fistfight. I want to watch but keep my attention on the actual conversation and not impromptu Wrestlemania smackdown.
"Five. Read 'em and weep. Full-day passes. You can bow down in worship at your earliest conscience." Iris doesn't bother correcting him again.
"Well, something actually productive for once. I'll give you kudos on that one." Jack squints at her as I can't stop from smiling. She sighs again.
"It means thanks."
"Ah! Right, of course it does. I knew that. So we good to go this weekend?" I nod yes as Iris does as well, a slight sparkle in her eyes lighting up. We turn to the twin tornado, finding them settled.
"Sup?" Asks Jo as he pats himself down.
Jack calls again, smugly. "You ready to lose your lunch on the spino-twister this weekend?"
"Oh for real?" E lights up.
"For real-real. Five tickets. No entrance fee, free rides. Still gotta buy food but everything else is free. As usual, the Jack-hammer delivers." He takes the moment to relish in his victory, earned sort've.
Jo answers for the both of them, "Be there. Ten good?"
"Yup, we'll meet at the front. Ten AM. Be there or be square. Or both." He gives two thumbs-up, pocketing the tickets and taking his spot at the table as I glance to the twins. A quick answer to their conundrum offered.
"Oh and turns out it was for fourth graders."
"Ten-year-olds" Back-to-back answers as the spat's been settled and lunch has resumed, Jack choosing to ignore the statement and normal conversation now back on track as the prospect starts to dawn on me. Never been to an amusement park before. I pull my phone out to check in on what's going to be happening, seeing a few rides and attractions. I bite my tongue, a bit unsure.
"You worried?" A quieter voice touches my ears softly. I look up to see Iris dragging me into a private conversation.
I sign at her, "Not really. Never been, though." She cocks her head slightly.
"It'll be fun. They have all kinds of food and rides. Bring some pocket change, 'kay?" With a wide smile. I nod and sign back a quick 'can do' as I worry a bit more. I already get carsick pretty easy. Not sure how much I'll be able to enjoy the actually rides but at the very least it's an outing with friends.
I check my phone while I stand out front of the gates, nervous. Wasn't really until I saw just how many people this place attracts. Photos of amusement parks online made them seem sparsely populated, local, and not the size of a couple of football fields. I can tell my feet are gonna hate me after today. I glance back up to look around, head swiveling to try to pick out my little group.
A bit too early. Don't like keeping people waiting so I don't mind waiting myself. Nine-forty-five when I got here and nine-fifty-five it is now. Foot taps to try to weasel out some negative energy while I check my phone again, hoping to not see some sort of text that they were flaking or gonna be late. Hand touches my shoulder and scares the daylights out of me.
"Lur! Hey!" Oh thank goodness it's just Iris. I unclench and huff as she chuckles.
"I spook you? My bad, L. You see the Jo's or Jackie anywhere? Should be here in a sec." She squints and puts a hand up to shade her eyes from the sun. I follow suit and peer around again as well to find the other three joining in tandem, stepping out of Jack's Mom's van. Well loved and very, very loud. I can hear humming even through the haze of the crowd. How's he not deaf?
I spy Jack leaning in to talk to his Mom while J and E join up.
"Hey you two! You catch a ride from Jack?" Iris greets as they step, forming a circle now.
"Yup, long way from our place and Jack lives near enough so we ended up carpooling with him." Jo puts a finger in his ear as his sister mirrors, opposite side.
E speaks, "Can guess why Dad's kinda deaf now." I snort out a laugh at the joke, three more smiles all around as the joke lands well. Jack joins in, a little bit frustrated with his parental figure.
"Alright, Raptor Christ. We ready?" Out comes the tickets from a pants pocket, and four more nods to his question. With that we march right over, line moving quickly as we enter the park.
It's even worse inside. Narrower lanes means more people-per-inch and we're really, really packed in. I never thought myself as any sort of claustrophobic but that may be changing with this sort of thing. Finally into a more open area and I'm allowed to breathe again, Jack ignoring any sort of strife I may be currently under to guide us.
"Alright! First on the list is that. The spino-twister." He points with a finger to a full-on roller coaster. It's massive and intimidating. Huge sign on it labeling it. I feel a bead of sweat running down my back. "Longest wait in the park. After that it's lunch then we split off. One-two-three break!" He doesn't even stop for a second as we're all lead over to the wait, a good thirty-plus people long.
I can't help but keep my eyes on it as the line lurches forward every few minutes, a new set of people sent up and over. Screams echo off it as the cart rolls by, rails creaking and rattling. The conversation happening nearby tuned out while I look at this monster. Scared, but excited. Probably why people go on these things in the first place. We step forward again and I notice a set of eyes on our group from a worker.
Over strides some collegiate under-paid staffer, red dino of some sort, calling to us as he gets closer, voice flat and very much betraying the fact he'd rather not be here, or be talking to us, or existing probably.
"Oh hey dude you're under the height limit. You can't go on this one safely, man." A vermilion clawed thumb points at a sign nearby. Height chart with Jack just barely being under the minimum. I consider for a moment if I find this funny or not. I land on a big fat yes as I hear him complain nearby.
"Oh come the fu- freak on! You're kidding! It's like an inch, man!" A shaggy head shakes.
"I can get fired if you get hurt." I have to bite my tongue at the scenario. Sucks, but deserved. Sorta. A little bit of back and forth happen while the rest of the group listen in intently. Jack isn't getting through at all and has to accept it, threat of security dropping us if he doesn't. Pouting and folding his arms he steps out and I feel empathetic for the goblin.
I glance to Iris and sign a quick, "You guys go ahead."
Her head pulls back and eyes blink a few times as I start to walk after Jack, a hand grasps my wrist and stops me.
"You sure, Lur?" I turn back to see her begging slightly with her face. I just shake no and shrug. She frowns and lets go, but also steps forward. "Too nice for your own good, you know?" She half-heartedly chides.
Seems that our little exodus turns into the full five as both of the twins fall into pace as well, walking after Jack. "Not much point if it's just me and the moron" "-the idiot." The two squint at each other as the sentence takes a divergent path.
A few more paces forward and we catch up to Jack, surprised that we've abandoned our spot in the line. "The hell?"
I sign at him, "Not much fun without you." Iris translates, wrongly.
"He says you suck." I frown at her as Jack scratches his head. She smiles back, "Kidding. He says it won't be fun without you. And for the record I disagree."
"Lur, my man. You coulda gone. Unless...you're scared." Alright lesson learned. I give a short middle finger to the bary as he cackles, already recovered and unthankful.
"Right, well. Guess we can pick some of the smaller stuff. Hey how about that?" Another point, this time to a smaller thing, shorter wait. Only about twenty-feet tall this coaster, and a short ride. Minute or so. Alright, why not?
Turns out that height limit might be universal. Think I saw Jack go full red, which is rather impressive considering just how blue he actually is. And this time we do actually end up riding, The Jo's in front and Iris and I in a set of seats behind.
It's a good time, mostly. Was a bit right about the queasiness though. I can feel breakfast knocking on the door, letting me know it's ready to head out the front at any time, just say the word. Stomach bubbling and head swimming we exit the coaster, my legs weak as I'm set out towards the nearest trash can.
I survive and manage to keep my insides inside, taking big breaths of air as I join the group at a table, lunch now on track, Iris all the while still patting me the back and making sure I'm not about to drop dead. I have to wave her off several times as half-burps still rock my body.
"Behold, the pinnacle of food. Deep. Fried. Dough." Jack brandishes a funnel cake. A huge helping of it, sugared and syruped. Makes my stomach hurt to look at. "Funnel cake."
"Pssh, no that's deep fried Snichthyosaurs bars." J bats back. E takes her full form and sits square. I rub my brow as I can tell what's coming on.
"You're delusional if you think it's not poutine." Right into a loud argument about food again.
Jack even jumps in now, lots of mild name calling as it goes. Spurring on my already throbbing headache.
"You know what? A contest. Me and you, sis. First to win a prize at one of those carnival scam things takes it." E scoffs.
"Just looking to piss away your allowance? Deal." In a flash they're off, gently elbowing each other and attempting to trip one-another. I glance back to see Jack taking his shoes off. I sigh and close my eyes.
"Hey you two got anything like flat and maybe about an inch tall? Iris? Lur?"
Iris thankfully answers for me, "Nah, Jack. Hey I'ma walk with Lur for a minute. Think he's still a bit sick." A grunt of confirmation from bary as I feel Iris guide me to stand.
Eyes back open and less swirling as she walks with me while we head into a less crowded part of the park, benches and nature abound. Quieter. Stomach finally decides to quit it's gymnastics routine as we pace around.
"Well, can't say I didn't expect this. Always the same with Jack." She folds her arms. I sign back, in his defence slightly.
"Still had fun." Iris doesn't quite believe me at first but relents after a few seconds of looking over me.
"Good enough then, right? You feeling any better?" I nod.
"Learned my lesson." She snickers.
"Yeah that little lightning-fast track probably was a bit much. Hey you think you could handle something slow?" I look ahead to where she's pointing her face to see a ferris wheel. Lit up in glowing lights and adornments. Very pretty, very big.
I shrug as I watch it slowly turning. "Worst that can happen is I spew. Sure." She smiles at my signing.
"Cool. Come on, line's short."
And so we do. It's still a good fifteen minute wait before we're allowed on the five-minute ride but as the carriage starts up I can see why it's popular in the first place.
The view of the city begins sprawling out in front of me. Colors and lights and glimmering reflections shine back. Makes me feel small from up here. All I've really known stares back at me.
"Pretty, huh?" Iris peers out into the city with me, afternoon light dancing orange across Volcaldera.
I clear my throat, not wanting to have to turn to sign. "Yeah."
To my surprise I find a hand touch my own, tearing my eyes down for a brief moment to see I've been grasped onto. Eyes turn from hand to Iris to see her smiling warmly.
"Worth the struggle, huh?" I smile back and nod. Just a thumbs-up this time.
Hands freed and we go back to watching the city crest, then rise. Back to ground level and not a moment too soon. Even that was almost enough to set me back into nausea. Solid ground making me feel right back at home.
"You get the same with cars, yeah?" Iris asks as we wander back into the middling area, ready to meet up with the others again. Guess she remembered me bringing it up one time. I'm slightly touched she'd remember something so small.
"Ever since I was little." I get a pat on the back again. Feels pretty nice, all things considered.
As we walk to the little restaurant to call the group back, make our exit I spy two absolutely oversized plushies...moving? As I crane my head to try to figure out what's causing the things life I spy a tail behind one of them. One I recognize. I touch Iris' arm to get her attention and point.
"Well I'll be damned. Look at them." She cackles as we move over to the Jo's, both heavily overshadowed by their bounties.
"Oh hey you two, check it." J shakes his giant plush bear while E sets her own giant plush bear aside slightly.
"Back-to-back winners. Think they set the cheaty dials wrong." E waves at us with the paw of the thing, offering me to shake it. I accept.
"And guess what? We ended up deciding to just try each other's pick and found something else. Behold. The heart-stopper."
I see what I can only assume is a solid block of fried...something. Half-way eaten sitting between them.
"Deep fried block of cheese and potato." E nods.
"Sweet, salty, early death." J nods as well. In tandem now they finish.
"Disgustingly good."
I see a chance. Stomach's not dying and I could eat. Even if it'll threaten me with a nice greasy death. Screw it. I reach in and take a free fork, yanking up a bite into my mouth. They're right. It's disgustingly good. And I can feel a few years fall off the end of my life. Might be worth it.
"Yeah!" Another yell in twain as I find a purple hand next to mine, also trying. Iris gags with it in her mouth.
"Oh my God it's swimming in oil."
"That's what makes it good, I." E gives a thumbs up as Iris moves over to spit her bite into a trashcan nearby.
As I watch her do so I spy Jack strutting high nearby. A bit wobbly. Oh you absolute moron.
Sure enough, the guy's beaming and clearly a few inches taller, feet threatening to kick from under him.
"Who's got two thumbs and just went through the spino-twister!" He points to himself, with thumbs. "This guy!"
The group collectively sighs while Iris wipes her mouth, "And who'd you have to beg to let you cut in line?"
The sarcastic comment is taken at face value. "Oh just one of the employees. Worth it." My hand touches the bridge of my face as I smile. Our moron.
Another collective laugh as we rejoin at the table, small recounts of the workers looking horrified as both the twins got to walk off with plushies the size of them combined while Jack recounts a little story about how he put on his "Jack-hammer charm" and almost cried to one of the employees manning the thing to get him to skip the queue.
All thing's considered I had a hell of a time. Smiling and nodding along listening to the laughing and teasing that flies freely as the rest of the day is spent socializing. Was already having a good time but this has to take the cake. Didn't even spend a dime, either. Should probably rectify that.
I peer around as the group has a good time and excuse myself quietly, noticing something nearby. A small stand of souvenirs. Shirts, pins, the ilk. I spy what I saw glittering in the light.
I take a deep breath and clear my throat to get the pale-yellow dinos attention, his straw hit lifting as he turns to me.
"What can I get ya?" Finger points to the small jeweled necklace, diamond shaped with a pale purple gem in the center surrounded by silver and a black string, and I force myself to speak.
"That. Please." Hurts. Makes me feel embarrassed. I chew through it anyway.
"Right-on, that it?" I nod yes, making sure he sees me. I notice his eyes turn from me back to where I'd come from, following my own gaze it seems.
"For the girlie?" His voice teasing. I blush a bit and nod.
"How sauve, cassanova." I put two bills on the counter to pay, noticing only one's taken as the little necklace is handed to me. As my mouth opens to try to protest, throat straining again I notice a finger on his snout. A wink.
I take my discount and return to the group, the moment I do both of the twins springing up.
"Watch our stuff for a minute. Gotta hit the restrooms." and "Ditto" as the two scurry off, leaving just Iris, Jack and I.
"Oh hey where'd you go?" Iris questions as I take my spot beside her, offering her the little trinket with a short explanation.
"Thought I'd say thanks for keeping me company." I offer her the thing as nonchalantly as possible, watching her eyes scan it. I pray it's quietly accepted. I get more than I'd asked for.
"Lur! Oh my goodness." And with it comes a hug. Warm and scaled and soft and way too much. I hear a snort from across the table.
"Get a room!" I hear what I can only compare a whip to as Iris strikes Jack with her tail under the table. Noted. Don't piss her off.
She lets me go, shooting a fiery glance once to Jack as he rubs his shin and seethes air. "You're so sweet. Thanks."
"And where's my present?" The mood-spoiler pouts from his side of the table. I feel another tail coming in for the other shin and try to jump in before she can bruise him any more, splaying my hands to grasp her attention as she scowls.
"I'll do that math assignment for you you've been asking." I sign, Jack looking to Iris to translate.
"Oh don't indulge him, Lur." She pleads.
I shake no. She sighs and relents. "Alright, alright. Says he'll do that math thing you keep begging him for."
Jack lights up as if he'd just won the lottery. "Lur! My skinnie!" I notice Iris facepalming out of the corner of my eye as Jack clasps my hand in his, a tight-fisted shake.
"You're the bomb!" I roll my eyes now and snake from his grasp as the Jo's rejoin, our time to exit the park now coming as night is threatening the orange of the sky. The day a win, all things considered even if it started rough. Had to remind myself the hard way I'm not built for vehicles. Alas.
As the group parts ways at the front, the three J's all loading back into the loudly bumping van, Jack's Mom waving at me from the driver's side while they do so. I give a quick wave to Iris, letting her know I'm about to head off, noticing she's wearing the necklace I'd got already. Looks nice on her. I start to turn only to find her galloping over to join me.
"Woah hey, you're taking the bus, right?" I nod and sign back a yes.
"Lemme walk with you until the stop, 'kay?" I don't see why not. I nod again, her pace hitting my own natural meander as we walk and talk.
"Didn't' really get to say thanks with the killjoy ruining the fun. But I mean it, Lur. It's so sweet of you." I feel my face a bit red as I shrug, not sure what to say to her.
"Really had a good time. You?" She makes it abundantly clear. I nod back, agreeing.
"Oh that's great. I was worried, really." Strikes my hearstrings again, hearing someone care about me like that is a bit much. I just keep nodding along as she goes on.
"You know how they others can be and I was worried they'd be...them too much. And not let you enjoy yourself. Super good to hear that didn't come to pass." I get a bit defensive of the others, signing back.
"They're fun even if they're a bit much. You're all good friends."
In a flash I get a side hug, "Awww, Lur. C'mere." Another soft embrace, only sidelong this time as we hit the stop. It lingers a while.
"Well guess this is where I'm off. We really should do this again. Maybe somewhere a bit quieter next time. And hey, Lur?" I turn to face her.
"Maybe just you and me next time?"
I nod right along, of course. Why not? And suddenly my head tells me why not. Just the two of us? Lur, that's a date. Wait a second was the little wheel ride a date? Oh no I'm not equipped for this. I glance up to see her beaming wide.
"You're the best! I'll text you later, 'kay?" I nod at her huge upswing as she walks off, almost jogging. She's very clearly happy about this.
And I can't say I'm not, too. I feel warm inside at the prospect. Never thought it'd happen to me. Or be this fun and easy. I smile as I take a seat and wait.
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