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untitled fantube thing (long)

Notes

i cnat eblieve its done guys omggg im so so happy
ive been working on this since april!!!!!!!! dude you have No idea how happy i am to have this done,.,.,.,.,. fantube guys its fantube!!!!!!!!!
:333333
i hope you enjoy it :D


Fan stared at his phone screen. His text with Test Tube, his partner of two months after waiting three years to tell her how he truly felt, were open.

Fan was anxious beyond comprehension. It seemed like once they confirmed they were dating, the commitment of sustaining romance, something that Fan had absolutely zero understanding of, felt suffocating.

He didn’t want to break up with Test Tube, but he felt emotionally trapped, like he had signed a contract with hidden agreements that weren’t printed out, yet was expected to know the terms and follow them to a tee. He truly, deeply did love his girlfriend, but there was a heavy weight on his chest that he couldn’t lift off.

Suddenly, a chat bubble appeared. Fan hadn’t typed anything to Test Tube yet, why was she typing to him?

Soon, Fan received her message. It read, Hey, I need you down here. Come to my lab? :)

The last thing Fan needed.

He sighed and quickly typed out, yea sure! gimme a min

Test Tube replied, Alright, thank you. :D

Fan read her reply. She didn’t seem to mind, but the paranoia quickly hit Fan like a truck. It seemed like each passing day came with a more intense and terrifying fear that Test Tube would break up with him for something stupid he did two seconds ago like breathe wrong, and it scared him to death. Regardless of how often he tried to tell himself that it was all just in his head and that Test Tube wasn’t going to break up with him, he couldn’t help but feel like she would.

Slowly, he got up and headed to his partner’s laboratory. Once there, he found Test Tube… not experimenting. Nothing but confusion came to Fan’s mind.

Test Tube looked at Fan, her smile widening. “Fan!”

She ran up to Fan, him giving a weak, “Hi,” before getting squeezed by Test Tube hugging him. Once she let go of him, he said, “You don’t usually ask people to come down here, not even me.” Fan chuckled at the situation, smiling at the sight of his girlfriend.

“Oh, golly gee!” Test Tube laughed, “You got me! In reality, I wanted to ask you if,” she paused for just a moment, smiling while doing so, “you’d want to go out later today?”

Fan looked into Test Tube’s eyes. Without a lick of hesitation, he exclaimed, “Yes! I’d love to!” He shook his fists in excitement. He felt happy, Test Tube asked him out on a date!

Test Tube giggled at his eagerness. “I’m so happy you’re excited!”

Fan thought for a moment. He had an idea but didn’t know if Test Tube said later tonight for a reason.

After a moment, he asked, “What’re you doing in the meantime? From the looks of it, I’m guessing you’re not doing any experiments right now, right?”

“Yeah, I’m not. Why, do you wanna go now?” Test Tube asked.

She read Fan’s mind. “We can! I-I mean, only if you want to, we don’t have to!” he said.

Test Tube’s grin faltered slightly, causing Fan to regret saying what he said. Maybe he should’ve just agreed to go now. Test Tube wouldn’t have been saddened if he just had. He didn’t want to upset her, that was the last thing he wanted-.

“That’s okay! Still, we’re going tonight!” Test Tube exclaimed.

Fan opened his mouth to say something but instead just smiled at Test Tube. He pulled her into a hug and she reciprocated. It only lasted a few moments, but it felt nice to Fan.

“I’m gonna go. Text me when you wanna leave!” Fan said.

Test Tube grinned. “Okay!”

“Love you, Test Tube.”

“I love you, too, Fan.”

Fan ran back to the lab entrance, waving back to his partner. He stepped out of it and closed the door behind him.

Immediately, a feeling of worry and loneliness came over him.

What if Test Tube doesn’t text him to leave? What if she canceled the date and he didn’t hear her correctly?! Thoughts raced through his mind. He felt confused and upset over something out of his control yet was probably his fault. Fan winced as he tried to shut the paranoid thought up, but it was futile. A feeling of wanting to cry filled his face, but he opened his eyes to rid the feeling.

He saw Paintbrush passing by him. They looked at him with a mildly concerned expression, asking, “You okay there, Fan?”

Thank goodness they spoke to him because their interaction seemed to stifle the panic. He considered faking being okay, but ultimately decided, “No, I’m not.”

“Well, I’m heading back to our room. We can talk about it there if you want,” Paintbrush offered.

Fan figured he needed the comfort. “Okay,” he said as he followed Paintbrush to his and their room.

“What’s going on? You looked really upset just now.”

Fan debated whether or not to tell the truth, but decided he would. “Well, you see…” he sighed, “Test Tube asked me out on a date for later tonight. She asked if I wanted to go right then and there, and while I did want to go right then, I said only if she wanted to, but she didn't seem to like me doing that because she had a barely noticeable frown and-.”

“Okay, okay! You don’t need to tell me the entire play-by-play,” Paintbrush said in their usual annoyed tone.

“But I was almost done!”

“Yeah, yeah, it seemed long enough.”

The two were in their room by now, sitting on the side of their respective beds, facing each other.

Paintbrush started speaking, “So basically, Test Tube asked you out and now you’re freaking out because you’re scared you said the wrong thing?”

Fan nodded. “I don’t know if I should’ve said, ‘Only if you want to!’ but, honestly, I probably shouldn’t have.”

“Well, from someone who’s been dating your girlfriend’s best friend for a year, I’m pretty sure Test Tube wasn’t sad. If anything, she might’ve thought you just weren’t prepared to go then.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Fan replied.

And then Fan wondered something.

He looked directly at Paintbrush, making near eye contact with them, “What do you and Lightbulb do on your dates?”

Paintbrush, seemingly caught off guard, hesitated before saying, “Well… we often go to restaurants or go to the park, about every two-ish months-.”

“I don’t mean where and when, I mean what do you do on your dates?” Fan interrupted, “Like, what do you talk about or what specifically do you go out to do?”

Once again stunned, Paintbrush said with an angered tone, “Could you not interrupt me?!” They exasperated, “We sometimes talk about what’s on our minds or what we found interesting that day. Sometimes we just… I don’t know. We just ramble, honestly. And for what we do, again, we go to restaurants and the park.”

Fan didn’t verbally respond immediately. Was he overthinking all of this? What if it truly wasn’t something he needed to stress so much over?

He took a moment before answering Paintbrush, “Thank you. I’m sorry I got a little aggressive there for a sec, heh.”

“You’re welcome,” Paintbrush said, “And, honestly, it’s not a big deal. You’re just overwhelmed and anxious.”

“Are you sure? You’re not mad?”

“No, I’m not,” Paintbrush said in a way that would suggest otherwise. “Anyway, why’d you wanna know what Lightbulb and I do? You and Test Tube went on dates before, haven’t you?”

Fan’s expression slowly became upset. He looked away from Paintbrush. “No. This’ll be our first one.”

A few seconds of silence went by before Paintbrush responded with, “I mean… you could ask Lightbulb what she’d say, but it’d probably be the same thing I said.”

Fan faced back to his roommate. “I’ll go ask her anyway. Do y’know where she is?”

“Nope. For all I know, she could be in Test Tube’s lab or out playing with Baxter. Actually, she’s probably out playing with Baxter. I can ask her real quick,” Paintbrush said, getting out their phone and typing, giving no time for Fan to tell them not to. Not that he was going to, but it surprised him when Paintbrush said, “Yep, she’s outside,” within only ten seconds afterward.

“You both… typed and responded to each other so… fast, faster than I do.”

Paintbrush laughed. “You always make sure there’re no typos in your text. Lightbulb and I just don’t care.”

“Fair enough.” Fan stood up from his bed and said, “I’m gonna go find her. See ya later?”

Paintbrush waved to Fan, not verbally responding. Fan frowned at them doing that.

Nonetheless, Fan went out of the room in search of his friend.

He didn’t bother paying attention to what was happening within the hotel as he passed through it, but he did find Lightbulb outside playing with her and Paintbrush’s pet crab.

Lightbulb was lying on the ground on her front, kicking her legs behind her, her right arm propping herself up, and her left hand petting Baxter.

Lightbulb seemed to have heard Fan’s rustling through the grass, because she stood up and turned to face him, smiling while doing so. She waved at him, shouting something Fan wasn’t able to decipher. It sounded like a song that you couldn’t quite understand and needed to see the lyrics to know what it was saying. Fan waved back and ran over to Lightbulb as she stood up.

“Hey, Lightbulb!” Fan greeted.

“Hiya, Fan!” Lightbulb greeted back. “Painty said something about how you were lookin’ for me.”

Fan smiled. He’d been doing that a lot, huh? “Yeah. I wanted to ask, what do you and Paintbrush do on your dates?”

Lightbulb giggled. “Oh, we go on dates all the time! Sometimes we don’t even go out, we just raid the fridge and try to make the best cookie pizzas ever!”

Fan raised an eyebrow. “Paintbrush said you two only go out every two months to restaurants and stuff.”

“Oh, Painty doesn’t consider our cookie-pizza-making battles as dates. It’s sad, really. Our going-out dates are to restaurants and stuff.” Lightbulb picked up her crab, “Sometimes we even take Baxter along with us so he can have some fun, too!”

“Aww,” Fan cooed, “that’s so sweet!”

“You can hold him if you’d like!” Lightbulb offered as she held out Baxter to Fan. Baxter blinked as he eyed Fan.

“Are you sure? Wouldn’t Paintbrush get upset?” Fan had talked to, well, more so talked at Baxter, who would never respond since he couldn’t speak himself. But Fan had never pet Baxter, let alone held him, especially without Paintbrush or Lightbulb’s permission.

“No, Painty’s okay with it as long as I’m okay with it,” Lightbulb said.

Fan looked at the little red creature sitting on the palms of his friend’s hands. After a hesitant moment, Fan finally reached out to Lightbulb to allow Baxter to crawl into his own hands, which Baxter did.

Joy immediately overcame Fan. Knowing that someone like Baxter would allow him to love and cherish them without judging him, perceiving or in reality, made him feel happy. Though, he did feel bad about it in a way. He felt awful for being unable to give affection like everyone else did.

Fan looked at the crab looking at him. A pained smile appeared on his face. He suddenly felt like he was going to cry.

“Aw, Fan, what’s wrong? Did Baxter pinch you? Bad Baxter!” Lightbulb said.

Fan’s voice started to break. “No, Baxter didn’t do anything. You give him so much love and care like you do me, but it feels like I can never give that same love and care back. At all!” He sniffled. “It sucks. I can’t give you or Paintbrush or Test Tube the right kind or amount of love and affection as you all give me and I hate it so much. Testy asked me out earlier and I’m freaking out over nothing like usual!” By this point, Fan was crying before he realized he was.

Lightbulb said, “Fan, whatever you do to show love and care for others is always appreciated. I can speak for all of us, especially Tube when I say that we all know you love us a lot! You’re amazing, even Baxter here knows that!”

Fan looked down at Baxter yet again and, after a moment, smiled as he wiped the tears falling from his eyes. He sighed, “Thanks, Lightbulb. Here, take Baxter back,” he said as he returned Lightbulb’s pet to her.

Lightbulb grinned. “No problemo! I know that on a date, Tube would just wanna spend time with you, nothing super big and fancy is needed to wow her. She loves you just the way you are, fan. Knowing you, you’ve already stolen her heart.” She winked at her friend.

Fan laughed, finally getting his voice somewhat back to normal. “Yeah, you’re right. I need to be confident! I got this! I’ll show her that I love her so, so much that she’ll never say otherwise!”

“That’s the Bright Light I know!” Lightbulb exclaimed, snapping her fingers.

Fan sighed, having hope that what he said would be true. “I do love her, dearly. She’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I just…” he paused, thinking about how to phrase it carefully, “I-I just-, I can’t seem to get myself to… argh!” He groaned in frustration. “What is it about me that makes being in a relationship so terrifying? I feel uncomfortable when I don’t want to be, because I do love and want to be with Test Tube, but ever since we made it official, it’s just been so hard for me to be at ease around her.” He put his face into his hands.

“Maybe talk to Balloon?”

Fan looked up at Lightbulb. “Why him?”

“Well, you see,” Lightbulb said in a singsong voice, “he’s told me things that in this here moment of you saying all this stuff reminded me of you. I think it’d be a good idea to go talk to him.”

“Why?” Fan became more confused as Lightbulb talked.

“Just go talk to him! You’ll see,” Lightbulb smiled, playfully pushing Fan to the hotel entrance, causing him to yelp.

“Alright, alright!” Fan said chuckling, “I’ll go find him. I’ll see you later!”

“Buh-bye, Fan!” Lightbulb waved at Fan, and he waved back.

As Fan went back inside the hotel to find Balloon, yet again a wave of anxiety filled his mind. He didn’t want that again, so he rushed to find the one Lightbulb told him to talk to.

Rather quickly, he found Balloon writing in the living room.

Fan approached Balloon. The inflated object was seemingly engrossed in whatever he was writing in his notebook.

“Hey, Balloon,” Fan said.

Balloon jumped slightly and looked at Fan. “Oh, hey Fan! Do you need anything, or…?”

Fan was hesitant, but decided to just outright ask, “What’s your experience with relationships? Dating specifically.”

Balloon briefly gave a confused expression before bursting out in laughter, causing Fan to be even more confused than what Balloon looked like just a moment ago. He tilted his head at the round object in front of him.

“Oh, hahaha! Ohhh, if you’re looking for relationship advice, you’re asking the wrong person!” Balloon laughed.

Fan frowned. “But Lightbulb told me to talk to you specifically!”

Balloon’s laughing came to a complete stop at Fan’s statement. “Oh. Either she’s playing a really unfunny prank on me, or she sent you for a specific reason,” he paused, “and it’s probably the latter.”

Fan finally sat down next to Balloon, asking, “If you don’t date, what reason could she be sending me to you for?”

Balloon waited a moment before responding. “I’ve been slowly telling everyone as they bring it up, but I haven’t made a big coming-out announcement about it, so I’m not surprised you don’t know.”

“Wait, are you saying you’re gay and that’s why you don’t date? Balloon, there’s nothing wrong with-.”

“Fan! I never said I was gay!” Balloon said at a slightly loud volume before groaning. “Fan, I’m aromantic. That’s why I don’t date.”

“Aro… mantic? What’s that?” Fan tilted his head again.

“Basically, I don't find people attractive. In a romantic sense, at least.” Balloon flipped a page in the notebook he was holding and scribbled something in it that Fan wasn’t able to see due to Balloon facing him and the notebook facing away from him until Balloon held up the page to Fan. “You see the ‘romantic’ part of the word? The ‘a-’ prefix means ‘none.’ Thus, aromantic means no romantic attraction.”

“Huh,” Fan said, “that’s cool.”

“Well, if Lightbulb sent you to me, she must think you are, too. Have you been having trouble with dating? Do you not feel like you’re in love with anyone?”

Fan thought about his relationship with Test Tube. He blinked, suddenly feeling tears threaten to fall unexpectedly. “Thing is, I’m dating Test Tube. I love her with all my heart, I really do. I’ve had a crush on her for over three years ago that finally became a reality two months ago! But ever since we did start dating, I don’t know what it is, but… I feel like I have to do this in a specific way that I’m super unfamiliar with. It’s frustrating and scary, yet I guarantee that if I break up with her for this very reason, I’ll be hopelessly lovesick for her and…” Fan trailed off as he realized that he did start crying. “Sorry.”

Balloon’s expression looked sympathetic. “I get it. I’ve been in a similar boat before. Nickel and I dated a while back when season three of II was airing. I felt like I wasn’t doing any of the romance stuff right, so I told Nickel that I think we’re better off as friends for the sake of that fact. We’re best friends now.” He put a hand on Fan’s shoulder, “If you do explain how you feel to Test Tube, I’m sure she’ll understand,” he smiled.

Fan frowned and a couple more tears came flowing down his cheeks. “I don’t want to break up with her, though! I’ll regret it way too much if I do!”
“I never said anything about breaking up with her,” Balloon said, causing Fan to look directly at him through his teary eyes. “Y’know, even if you are aromantic, you can still date if you want and desire to. There’s no stopping you from doing so, you just won’t have the romantic attraction.”

Fan’s eyes slowly dried up. He sniffled, “Really?”

“Yeah. I personally don’t want to be in a relationship, but if you wanna keep yours with Test Tube, go for it.”

“I’m sure she’d want me to tell her how I really feel,” Fan said, wiping his eyes dry for the second time that day. “Testy asked me out on a date for later tonight and I’ve been panicking about it since then. I do want to be with her, it’s just… awkward? I guess? I dunno, I’m rambling.”

“Are you ready to go out on it, though?” Balloon asked. “Maybe-.”

Fan’s phone a Ping! sound, and he immediately went to check it.

Oh no.

A text from Test Tube read, Hey! When you’re ready, I’ll be waiting by the hotel’s front door. I’ve already made reservations at… Actually, I’ll just show you. You’ll be so excited! I love you!

Fan, without hesitation, exclaimed, “I’ve gotta go!” and got up and headed for the door, but was briefly interrupted by Balloon.

“Fan! Make sure you tell her!” Balloon told him while smiling.

“I will! Thank you so much, Balloon! Bye!” Fan didn’t wait for a response before heading to his room, seeing that Test Tube was, in fact, waiting by the hotel entrance on the way there.

Once in the room, he saw Paintbrush, who seemingly noticed his excitement. “You alright?” they asked.

“Yeah, we’re about to leave,” Fan replied, a big grin plastered on his face as he reached for a plushie that fell off the side of his bed.

Paintbrush audibly smiled. “Good luck, dude! You got this!”

Fan appreciated his roommate’s cheer for him. “Thanks, Paintbrush. It means a lot coming from you.”

“Of course. Now show Test Tube that she’s the luckiest girl in the world to have you as her partner!”

“I will! Wait-,” Fan stopped for a moment, giggling at how they said the last thing they said, “You don’t say things like that, usually.”

“Well, I am cheering on a dear friend of mine, of course I’d say things in a way not normal for me. Now go! She’s waiting!” Paintbrush said, smiling.

“Thank you. See ya!” Fan rushed out the door and headed to the entrance to finally greet his girlfriend.

Once there, he saw Test Tube. She held a bouquet in her hands―maybe four or five flowers were in it. Fan stopped walking toward her and instead stared at her in admiration. She must’ve heard his footsteps, because, immediately after, she turned to face him. She greeted him with a smile, and Fan smiled back.

Fan took the final steps to Test Tube to be within arms’ reach. “You look amazing.”

Test Tube chuckled. “It might be because of the flowers in my hands, considering I didn’t put anything extra on,” she said, “but you also look nice, Fan.” The compliment made Fan happy.

“Thank you,” Fan replied. He gently kicked a foot and put his hands behind his back momentarily as he asked, “Sooooo… where’d you wanna take me for our date today?”

“You’ll see,” Test Tube responded with a sinister look that Fan knew was her teasing him. That was one thing he loved about her; her sense of humor was different from anyone he’d ever met, whether it was because she didn’t mess with social media while the rest of the hotel did or that she simply had her own way of joking around with others. Fan found it so endearing and he didn’t want to lose that in a million years.

Fan blinked softly. “So, are you ready to leave? I can’t wait to see what you have in store for me.”

“First, I want to give you this,” Test Tube reached out with her hands full of flowers for Fan to take.

Fan just looked at the flowers. “You got them for me?”

“Yeah! I thought that you’d enjoy them. Do they smell good?”
Fan put his face to the plants and took a long whiff of their scent. They smelled sweet. It reminded Fan of the love Test Tube always showed she had for him.

“They smell pretty.” Fan briefly frowned, avoiding frowning enough for his girlfriend to notice.

He felt bitter, in a way. He didn’t get her anything as a pre-date gift. He didn’t deserve this gift from her. He felt so, so awful. All over something as simple as receiving flowers. He should’ve gotten her flowers. It didn’t feel right. He was a bad boyfriend. He didn’t deserve her love.

“Fan?”

He looked up at Test Tube, “Y-yeah?”

“Are you okay? We don’t have to go on this date if you don’t want to,” Test Tube said.

“Nonono!” Fan exclaimed, “I want to go, I just… I think I’m just nervous?” He chose his words carefully. He didn’t want Test Tube to realize that he was no longer nervous about it anymore.

Test Tube’s concerned expression didn’t budge beside saying, “Okay then. You can tell me anything. You know that right?” which was not something Fan wanted to be told. He hated expressing his feelings, so he needed a way to avoid talking to her about anything relating to his emotions or how he was feeling. Ironic, huh?

“I know,” Fan told Test Tube. “Are you ready to go?” he asked, forcing a slightly cheery tone and smile.

Test Tube smiled at him, though her expression still looked a bit worried. “Yeah, let’s go!” she said as the couple exited the building to go on their long-awaited date.

As they eventually found a bus stop, they chatted with each other, even more so while on the bus as they waited for when they got to the restaurant. Fan gripped his plushie tightly and Test Tube rambled on about a new experiment that she needed to redo because it’d failed for the thirty-something time. Fan intently listened and was in shock at the number of attempts Test Tube had done and probably still needed to do.

Eventually, they reached what Fan assumed was their destination. It was a new spaghetti restaurant that had opened in the last few months, and everyone was talking about. The talk about how delicious some of the food made Fan want to try it for a while. Unfortunately, his social anxiety prevented him from going alone and no one wanted to go with him, so he was just stuck not being able to go.

Realizing that Test Tube took note of how much he wanted to try it and chose this specific restaurant as the location for their first date… it made Fan really happy. It warmed his heart.

Fan and Test Tube, now inside, got a table for two and were successfully seated.

Fan went ahead and looked at the menu that was placed in front of him by the waiter, setting the flower bouquet and his plushie on the table. It was a small booth where each seat was a double seat connected at the back, facing a table and another dual seat, which Fan and Test Tube were sitting across from each other.

Silence filled the square bubble of space directly surrounding the couple. Everyone in the building was talking, somehow not overstimulatingly loud for Fan, but he and Test Tube didn’t say a word as they looked at their menus.

Finally, Test Tube broke the silence between the two with, “You wanna get one of the meals for two? The baked spaghetti looks good. Maybe you’ll enjoy this one? Since you said that everyone enjoys the food a whole lot.”

“Hmm…” Fan mumbled aloud in brief thought, then quickly followed with, “No. I was probably going to get just plain ol’ spaghetti with marinara. Start with the base meal! Y’know?”

“Oh, okay,” Test Tube said, looking back at her menu.

Mental alarm bells went off in Fan’s brain, telling him Test Tube was upset with him.

“B-but if you want, we can!” he quickly blurted out although he really didn’t like baked pasta. The burnt cheese taste of the layer that covered the pasta itself didn’t taste good, but he knew Test Tube liked baked pasta. For her, he would eat the world’s biggest bowl of baked pasta.

Test Tube shook her head slightly. “No, it’s fine. Besides, I know you don’t like baked pasta that much, I just wanted something simple for our date…” She trailed off as her lips formed into a slight but noticeable frown.

Fan looked into Test Tube’s eyes. She looked like she was trying to hide how sad and upset she was with Fan. ‘This date is disappointing, I should break up with him,’ she must’ve been thinking. Fan felt like the world was crashing down on him over a facial expression. He felt pathetic for feeling this way, but he also felt like the universe was punishing him for it by making him feel like this. He wanted to say something, but he didn’t. He couldn’t. It’d only upset Test Tube even more than he already did if he were to.

Then, Test Tube spoke again, “Fan, I’m sorry if I’m not a good girlfriend. I feel like… I feel like I’ve done something wrong and you’re not telling me. It might just be me, but if it’s not, I want to know.”

Fan’s heart skipped a beat.

Another bout of silence entered the space between Test Tube and Fan. It was almost deafening—Fan felt sick that neither he nor Test Tube were speaking.

He couldn’t hide it anymore. He needed to tell her how he truly felt. Unfortunately for Fan, that meant having to express his emotions. That was mentally and physically excruciating and difficult for him to do.

Fan chose his words carefully.

“Test Tube, I…” His throat started to hurt. He had the sudden urge to cry again. He didn’t want to, though, so he took a deep breath to try and relieve the urge. “I’m sorry. I just… I just feel like I’m doing our whole relationship wrong and I feel like a bad partner and I try so, so hard to be a good boyfriend but-.”

Shhh,” Test Tube shushed, “slow down.”

Fan felt a streak of wetness down his face from his left eye.

“Now continue,” Test Tube said, lightly smiling. Her expression comforted Fan and seemed to have calmed him down, enough, at least, to recollect himself.

Fan stared at Test Tube for a minute or two before finally inhaling deeply and exhaling the same amount.

“I think… in a way, my crush on you might not have been an actual crush. I have this… sickening and heartwrenching feeling that it might’ve just been a really huge desire to be closer with you as a friend, but that I confused that desire with wanting to be romantic with you.” Fan paused for a moment to see if Test tube would interject, but continued once he realized she wasn’t going to, “I feel like, because of that, I dug myself a hole. One too deep to get out of. One where me now being in this relationship with you has made me fight with myself day after day over it. We’re together now—I don’t want to end that. But I keep feeling like I’m doing something wrong. I feel scared that you’re going to break up with me over the smallest things no matter how much I know you wouldn’t.”

Fan paused again as he stared into Test Tube’s eyes in an attempt to show that he trusts her.

“I love you. I really, really do. But I understand if you want to end our relationship because of this. I’m sorry, Test Tube.”

Fan looked down at the table in front of him. He didn’t want to see the pained and hurt expression on Test Tube’s face. This was the end. He was going to be single again. Not like he didn’t deserve it, but part of him wished that it would’ve gone another way. He should’ve cut her off so that she wouldn’t bear the burden of knowing her partner was losing attraction, even if he still wanted to stay with her.

This was it. This-.

“I’m not going anywhere, Fan,” he heard from across the table.

Fan looked up at Test Tube.

“Huh?” he said as anotther tear flowed down his cheek.

“I know you’re insecure. I know you dont know how to navigate your love life. Come to think of it, neither do I, to be quite honest.” Test Tube made direct eye contact with Fan, and he accepted it. “I don’t want to break up either. Frankly, I feel a bit hurt that you’d think I’d break up with you for something like this, but I also undersatnd that you’re just scared, so I can look past that.” She smiled as she said, “I love you, too. You’re my best friend and my partner. I would never trade or replace you with anyone. There’s no one like you, Fan.”

Fan, staring at her, took in every word that Test Tube told him.

Test Tube stood up from her seat, made her way over to where Fan was sitting, and wrapped her arms around him in a hug. Fan wrapped his arms around her as well.

As they held their embrace of each other, Fan gripped onto Test Tube’s back and released the wave of sobs he’d been subconsciously holding down inside him. He was happy—he couldn’t describe it any more coherently than that. He felt comforted in his girfriend’s arm. The two sat like that for another few moments before Fan pulled away just enough to be able to see Test Tube’s face.

As they made eye contact again, they smiled at each other as well. Fan loved Test Tube, and he knew she loved him.

Finally, Test Tube spoke, “You wanna head home before the waiter comes and just get fast food?”

Fan nodded, “Mhm,” as he wiped his face.

He and Test Tube both stood up and headed for the restaurant’s door.

“You feeling better?” Test Tube asked gently.

“Yeah.” Fan smiled bigger than he already was, then briefly sighed. “I talked to Balloon earlier and he said soemthing about how I could be aromantic like he is. I dunno, though.”

Test Tube chuckled. “Even if you are, that wouldn’t bother me.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, now we have to get on a bus.”

Fan and Test Tube eventually made their way home with a bag of fast food. They were confident in the other’s lover for them. Of course, there’d be bumps in the road, but it wouldn’t crash the whole relationship.

They exchanged many I love yous to each other from there on out, feeling happy that they were able to stay together. They loved each other deeply. They’d never separate if either of them could help it.

They ate their food in Test Tube’s lab as their long-awaited first date.


Notes

so uh. yea

Edit Report
Pub: 22 Aug 2024 14:26 UTC
Edit: 22 Aug 2024 14:34 UTC
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