Lilja
I am a turtle. I can speak, but my movements are slow. And above all, I'm sleepy...
Xue
What obvious expository dialogue...hey, are you seriously going to act with this lazy Nordic turtle?
Xue
Are you listening, Koyomi-san? Koyomi-san...?
Koyomi
...........
Koyomi
Oh, what a large turtle! It must be difficult for you to return to the sea like this?
Lilja
It's difficult, so I want you to carry me on your back. Holding me in your arms is also acceptable.
Koyomi
I understand. I'll help you now. Don't struggle and stay still, okay? Hnngh...!
Xue
(Koyomi-san is determined to act this through. As expected of our star performer, or should I say acting obsessed...)
Koyomi
Ugh, heavy...and...my feet are getting stuck in the sand! This is bad, I don't think I can move alone.
Koyomi
If only...if only someone were nearby...
Xue
(She wants me to join in. Glancing at me like that...)
Xue
(Well, even though it seems silly, Koyomi-san has created the flow. It should be a happy ending if we return that Nordic turtle to the sea.)
Xue
(This is our first chance to act together since "Night on the Galactic Railroad". I'll show her how much Wang Xue has grown since then.)
Xue
Ooh!? That's quite a big turtle? Where did you come from?
Lilja
Rovaniemi.
Koyomi
That's not a name I've heard around here? You seem to have come from very far away...
Koyomi
Oh, I'm late with my introduction. I am Urashima Taro. I want to return this mysterious turtle to the sea, could you help me?
Xue
(If I cooperate too easily, the story won't expand later and we'll struggle...I'll take a bit of a risk, hope you'll pick it up, Koyomi-san.)
Xue
Oh? What an interesting coincidence! Listen and be surprised. I am Urashima Taro!
Koyomi
You too!? Perhaps we were separated at birth...! No, that doesn't matter now. With two of us, we should be able to manage somehow.
Koyomi
(She's introducing an unexpected element. But thanks to that, the story has expanded. That's fine.)
Koyomi
(Now the setting is somewhat fixed. If we can just get Lilja-san, who isn't moving, to move-)
Lilja
So you both call yourselves Urashima Taro.
Xue
By coincidence. Now that you understand, move quickly. This Taro has a short temper, you know?
Koyomi
I don't want to be rough...but this is to return you to the sea. Please don't think badly of us.
Lilja
I see...
Lilja
-Stars, cycles, destiny. Ah, they have finally met. Two men tormented by the fate of helping a turtle. Both bearing the name Urashima Taro.
Xue
Don't add weird narration on your own. What are you saying?
Lilja
It's not me. If you heard it, it must be the voice of god.
Koyomi
W-What do you mean! A voice in my head...!?
Xue
Are you going to continue this!?
Lilja
-However, there can only be one protagonist. Two Urashima Taros are unnecessary.
Lilja
The two Taros quarrel. Aiming for the Land of Giants, a place permitted only to the true Urashima.
Xue
Not the Dragon Palace!?
Lilja
I'm a Nordic turtle. I don't have a passport for the Dragon Palace.
Xue
Hey, Koyomi-san! Is this really what they teach in textbooks and schools?
Koyomi
(Even if I want to deny it, the flow is connected. If I don't respond to unexpected settings, it won't constitute an impromptu play...!)
Koyomi
...Is this Land of Giants under the sea? If so, we won't be able to breathe and will drown.
Xue
T-That's right. I don't want to die yet! I don't need the jeweled hand box either!
Lilja
It's okay. We can swim while giving each other artificial respiration. If you wish, I could demonstrate for you.
Xue
That's even more unnecessary! I'm leaving!
Lilja
-However, conflict is an unavoidable fate. Here begins "The War Just Before the Final One."
Koyomi
Ugh...
Koyomi
(Lilja-san has taken the initiative. At this rate, there's no way to correct the course...)
Xue
Are you doing whatever you want!? Be serious, Finland!
Lilja
So Taro B's pride is only that much. No, Taro A might be similar.
Koyomi
...
Koyomi
(You've said it, Lilja-san. As an actor myself, I won't give up even with an outrageous setting.)
Koyomi
Very well, if conflict is unavoidable, then until we fight. I bear no grudge against the other Taro, but...prepare yourself.
Xue
Argh, all of you! I'm going to take you down a peg, come at me!
Koyomi
So, how should we settle this? If it's a swimming competition, I have no intention of losing.
Lilja
-There's no need to do such tiring things. Decide with rock-paper-scissors or something. Something fun would be nice.
Koyomi
You god, amusing yourself by toying with the common people...!
Koyomi
(What an unreasonable direction! Where are we supposed to feel the sea in this! We need to bring the topic back to the sea somehow...!)
Koyomi
Then I...I have no choice! A starfish drifting on the seabed...I choose paper!
Xue
! Then I'll choose scissors! You can change if you want? I might change too!
Koyomi
...No. I believe your words!
Lilja
Have you decided? Rock-paper-scissors-
Koyomi and Xue
Rock! Rock!
Koyomi
W-What is this...I trusted you...!
Xue
That's too bad, if you had stuck with your first instinct, you could have won! The one who hesitates loses, kekeke...!
Lilja
Fufu, one more time. Tie breaker-
Hikari
Rock-paper-scissors tournament!? Looks fun! Include me too!
Ramona
Is there a prize for the winner?
Koyomi
This is a battle to determine the true Urashima Taro! Don't intrude on this sacred stage!
Hikari
Hyah!? ...What do you mean?
Xue
You can see for yourself, it's an impromptu play.
Ramona
...This is?
Lilja
Ah, I thought of something good. Actually, I'm not a turtle, but a mermaid princess transformed by a curse.
Koyomi
W-What do you mean!?
Lilja
I got bored. Whoever brings me the items I say can marry me.
Lilja
Koyomi needs to bring prickly mistletoe. Xue, a noisy horn. Ramo, an undefeated magic sword. Hikari, a flying sailing ship.
Hikari
A flying sailing ship...that sounds cool...!
Ramona
Hmm, an interesting impromptu play. I suppose it's an adventure tale of heroes searching for treasures?
Xue
It was supposed to be "Urashima Taro"...
Lilja
I'm looking forward to seeing who will marry me. I hope you do your best before I return to the Dragon Palace.
Xue
I thought you didn't have a passport for the Dragon Palace!? At least stick to the settings you came up with yourself!
Koyomi
Haah, even though we came all the way to the sea...I don't feel like we've gained anything at all...