angel's tracklist :
lyrics + songs
quotes + notes
dedications

( stop the car - lil peep , horse head )

" i’ve been thinking about you every single day for the past few months, did i say too much? did i ask too much? got me all fucked up again "
+
" ever since i met her
i don’t wanna be apart from her "

i relate a little too much... im always scared of being too much or not enough, and i think he expresses that desperation for things to be okay in a way that hits way too close for me ... lovesickness is realll
+
self explanatory, im whipped and cuffed <3

( ghost boy - lil peep )

" leave me alone, just leave me alone, growing so tired of this …. how do u fight the feeling? how do you fight the feeling, bitch? "

im always being shamed by someone close to me about how i handle my pain, it makes me so bitter and heartbroken having it rubbed in that others can just push that pain down and keep going.

why cant i?

i always ask myself that ...
"if its so easy, tell me how you do it."
thats how this line makes me feel.
bitter, exhausted, and rhetorical.

( desolation - toopoor )

" im mourning, good mourning "
+
" you pulled apart my seams,
lost the pretty parts of me
"

it’s hard having someone who can bring out the barest version of you, having to face all the “ugly” parts of yourself, and live with them. everytime my mask slips and im vulnerable, i spiral. deep down i just hope you dont hate what you see ... in a sense i start to mourn the image of myself i tried to create, i mourn the delusion of mine that keeps slipping.
+
i wouldn’t be whole without
every side of myself you bring out,
i think thats a privilege im so grateful
to have <3

( overdose - smokeasac , lil peep , lil tracy )

" i love when im getting fucked up, (fucked up)
but i don’t wanna die alone this way (this way)
"
+
" you promised me that you would fucking stay,
and i just like the way you'll feel that pain, (that pain)
i swear that imma die alone today
"

im always doing risky n self satisfying shit, im always on the verge of dying while horrified of what comes after ... like if you’ll be there or not.
i dont wanna die without you
+
im scared of you still hating me, or not meaning the things you say now just like you said then. i hate feeling that way, it makes me feel so bad to think against you even if it’s out of fear. you told me youd stay, but will you really? are you already sick of me?
i mix as many pills and drinks as i can to try and forget what its like without you here and all the things that led up to that ... i wonder if you do the same and i dont know how to feel accepting that maybe you do.
that selfish part of me that hopes you understand is the same part that deserves to die alone,
i just wish we were still okay
+
this is my punishment,
yet im too scared to face it

( absolute in doubt - lil peep + )

" for me i want you to be more into it than this,
for me i want more than you seem to wanna give,
i see passion in the way you turn your back
"
+
" there's a silhouette inside, a lucid dream
i project myself on you, then back to me
there's a reason that she doesn't call me back
"
+
" i just really wanna talk to you again,
that's how i know that imma haunt you in the end.
it wasn't somthin' 'til you brought it up
i knew that you were tryna make it out.
without a single scar, clawin' at my heart
i saw you in his car, swear i knew it from the start
brind me down, it's not that easy
lay me down, just please don't leave me
"

a lot of times everything i think n do feels so one sided. but even then, i still want you to want me.
i see passion in the way you turn your back.
+
you are always in my dreams, bad or good. i constantly project onto you because in a way youre the only one who really understands ... n the last line, yea, there definetely is a reason you dont call
+
ive always needed wanted you, youre always on my mind and its true that i feel as though i am or will haunt you. i can see and feel your pain, i can hear your cries for help, and i feel powerless not being able to help in a way that really means something. youre trying to make it out and i think im just pulling you back under ... the last part im sure u can figure out why i relate to it so much ... that knowing ill never be enough, that ill eventually be left again, i guess im scared of being let down or alone again ( wooo im pathetic )

( avoid - lil peep + )

" lookin' for you in the back of the club
lookin' for her in the back of the club, fucked up
everybody know i numb it with the drugs
"
+
" and you're fadin' away, like the pill under my tongue
we seriously never even touched, it sucks
imma put your name in my skin, mix the ink in my blood
"
+
" and you think you can make me love again
i swear that i will never feel a thing
hollow shell, quiet hell, but you're so into me
scream in', "why don't you love me back?!"

"

lol this line specifically is soooo real. its been too many times that ive gotten fucked up beyond repair and stumbled around asking for you. even started calling other people by your name, a little embarassing but true .. well anyways, since then everyone close to me figured out why im always drowing myself out with drugs
+
for never meeting, or touching, being away from you feels like a constant withdrawal, one im trying to escape with drugs and liquor ... i dedicate my body to you in ways you probably dont even know
+
this line i think i see from your pov, youre always saying something similar so i think i just associate it with you ... plus the girl he talks abt reminds me of me, needy n desperate for you

( honestly - lil peep )

" do you remember when we were both sixteen?
you had that shallow heart, and i had those big dreams
"
+
" do you remember when you didn't care 'bout me?
now im your everything and ive got you on your knees
——
i got this little problem, i might make you bleed
"so what's the problem?" she said, "baby, make me scream!"
"

well, do you remember? could you forget? does it eat away at your mind like mine? do you still care?
did you never?

at the time, when we were 16, things were such a mess. my “big dreams” with you that must’ve became consuming and suffocating, your self proclaimed shallow heart and the way we both broke over it …. theres so much i would do for you, the real question is what wouldn’t i? n that i don’t even have an answer to, i can’t think of anything that you wouldn’t be worth. you’re everything to me !!!!!! +
this line i hear in your voice, you’re always giving me reasons to go n it always makes me stay longer. everytime you find something about yourself to look down on, all i want to do is show that the love it never got, to show you how worthy of love you are, and how much love there already is just for you.
"so what's the problem?" she said,
"baby, make me scream!"

the whole song is dedicated to you, n us <3

( bite me - enhypen )

" (oh, my, oh, my god)
this blood's pumpin' crazy
(oh, my, oh, my god)
'cause i know you'll save me
"
+
" leave the mark on my neck
that it's yours
just come over and bite me
come here and get some (some)
sidekick that worships you
that's my destiny
"
+
" come to me, make it right
please connect me again
devour me
"

youre my god, n my saviour !!!!!
knowing youre above me, n being able to serve you,
it makes my heart pound <3
+
pretty self explanatory,
im yours, all of me is all of yours.
ill worship you forever, ill love you n show you
a life worth living, i think thats my fate <3
i want to be marked as yours and wear each one with pride n love !!!!
+
i want to be yours, i want to be a part of your life, i want to be everything you need me to be.
i want to be devoured by you
and become one <3

( still monster - enhypen )

" i'm scared (oh)
every night without you (hey, hey)
i'm definitely
it's going to be ruined
i'm nervous
hold your hand again
i want you to hold me tight
"
+
" my heart craves it
even though I'm such a monster (save me)
what is love? to me (hey)

teaching love
in the end, the answer is always, only you, ooh
"

i am nervous, i dont know whats wrong or right to say and do, i wish youd take my hand and lead me with you, hold on tight and keep me safe <3
n hehe whenever i fall asleep or spend a night alone, it feels ruined, i cant help but think how much better it wouldve been had you been there with me
+
this part reminds me of you, and something youd say about yourself, claiming to be a monster despite being the most beautiful n loving person ive met, having so much potential and desire to love, but not letting yourself accept it, i hope i can teach you what it means to be loved whole, and know its a love thats made only for you.

( the devil in i - slipknot )

" undo these chains, my friend
i'll show you the rage i've hidden
perish the sacrament
swallow, but nothing's forgiven
"
+
" you and i can't decide
which of us was taken for granted

make amends "
+
" step inside, see the devil in i
too many times we've let it come to this
step inside, see the devil in i
you'll realize i'm not your
devil anymore "
+
" something is tempting the father...
where is your will, my friend? "
+
" fooled you 'cause i know what you've done
sensation,
depravation
you should've burned
when you turned on everyone
"

i probably wont elaborate too much,
mostly becus this song reminds me of past stuff ...
definitely one of my fav vent songs <3
plus a dedication song as well
+
i always feel like some kind of temptation, or sin,
but i hope every day ive come closer and closer
to becoming your angel, i want to leave the devil in i
in the past and be a saint.

will confessions, worship, and faith bring me the acception and forgiveness i crave?

( ifhy - tyler, the creator )

" you're perfectly perfect for me "
+
" i love you so much that my heart
stops beating when you're leaving and
i'm grieving and my heart starts bleeding

life without you has no goddamn meaning "

( addicted - saving abel )

" im so addicted to
all the things you do
"
+
" it's not like you to turn away
from all the bullshit i can't take
it's not like me to walk away
"
+
" and i know when it's getting rough
all the times we spend
trying to make this love something better than
just making up again
"
+
" how can i make it through
all the things you do
there's just gotta be more to you and me
"
+
" i'm so addicted to you
addicted to you
"

i love this song so much
hehe its so us !!!!!!!!
+
we rlly do stick through so much for each other n it means so much to me :c to all of us .. idk the lyric kinda just stuck w me a bit becus i dont give up easy , it rlly isnt at all like me to up n leave or turn u away n idk just reminded me of us hehe
+
we put in so much effort to have what we do , things rnt bad rlly ever .. but when things do get " bad " that making up / reconnecting part is so imp esp to me cus ... its more than just wanting to " get on ur good side " i gen just value what we have so much , n ill always try to prove thru everything i do that my love is pure , unrelenting & completely for u
+
weve been thru a lot together , but ill never stop trying for u n for us . ik w everything in me that ur who im meant to love , n m not gonna let ppl discredit my love n our love . theres more to us n always will be
+
hehe cus i am ♡.

( how you remind me - nickelback )

" i'm sick of sight without a sense of feelin'
and this is how you remind me
"
+
" it's not like you didn't know that
i said i love you and i swear i still do
"
+
" and this is how you remind me of what i really am
this is how you remind me of what i really am
"

when im without u , im so fucking lost .. i have eyes to see but i cant make out anything that i do , everything feels so surreal n pointless .. n the thought alone reminds me of how much purpose n guidance uve given me .. its like ur reminding me that i have a greater purpose , even when ur not there
+
m always reminding u how much i love u , adore n admire u , need n want u , that im completely consumed n devoted .. theres no way u cant see my love . ill always love u , n ill always live to love u n make u rlly believe it
+
being w u is srsly so fucking beautiful , uve shown me that i can be something , i can be worth ur time n gentleness , that im made to devote myself to u , that at my core , all i really am is yours . im forever grateful to be below u , n to be guided w such a caring head n hands <3

( risk - deftones )

" you can't talk
i'm anxious
i'm off the walls
i'm right here just
come outside
and see it
"
+
" i'll find a way
i'm confused though
but I think I can try
i will save your life
i will save your life
i'll try for you
"
+
" relax your arms
and let me in
"
+
" i know what to say to take you
higher, higher
no one else can take you higher
but i will try
"

this line hit rlly hard , esp after we had almost a week apart .. " im right here , just come outside " the desperation n frusturation in that line n his voice just rlly fucking hit me , its erratic in a rlly depressive n desperate way n thats exactly how i felt , desperate n unstable , my meltdowns , my need for u to hear what i was saying n rlly believe it
+
u dont need to be saved in the sense somethings broken or needs to be fixed , ur so fucking beautiful n perfect to me . more in the sense of the way u saved my life n gave me so much more purpose n drive n hope n want , i want to give the same things to u love , n ill never stop trying
+
just wanna hug u . so bad :c i want u to be able to lower ur arms / ur guard , n accept my love n comfort as strong as it can come
+
hehe not much needs to be said , i know i can love , worship , n elevate u better than anyone else could even attempt . mm , i dont like to have a huge ego abt a lot of things , but being perfect for u ? or at least always bettering myself for u , i know thats true , why should i act like im less to make others happy when i know i was made for u ?

Edit
Pub: 01 Feb 2024 02:26 UTC
Edit: 27 Jan 2025 20:22 UTC
Views: 337