Why do people use contradictory labels?
Definitions
To understand why a person uses contradictory labels like gaybian, bi-lesbian, or turigirl, words like "Gay" "Lesbian" and "Vincian" have to be decided
Gay
Gay has many defintions, however the two most popular are:
- mlm attraction ) Any mlm man
- Any non-straight attraction ) any non-hetero person
Ill be using definition 2, any non-straight person, in this explanation
Lesbian
Overtime, the definition of lesbian has changed a lot, and the answers still vary. Here is some definitions of "lesbian"
Disclaimer! Its important to remember words can have multiple definitions and one persons lesbianism may be different from yours, however its important to accept others way to describe their lesbian attraction, and as long as no one claims this is the one true lesbian definition and everyone else is wrong, its alright to define ones attraction that way
Vincian
Overtime, the definition of vincian has changed a lot, and the answers still vary. Here is some definitions of "vincian"
Disclaimer! Its important to remember words can have multiple definitions and one persons Vincianism may be different from yours, however its important to accept others way to describe their vincian attraction, and as long as no one claims this is the one true vincian definition and everyone else is wrong, its alright to define ones attraction that way
Explanations
- Historic definition
previously, lesbian included bi women, as they were still attracted to women and lesbian meant QLW, however then terfs kicked them out
- Plurals ) systems
a system may define themselves as mspec mono because they may have a large lean to one sexuality but do not want to disregard their other attractions
They may also have a large amount of mspec (ex: bi) and mono (ex: vincian) alters so for that reason they may call themselves mspec mono (ex: bi-vincian)
- Multi-gendered & other trans people
a multigendered person may call themselves a lesboy or a turigirl as they may want to have their gender repersented (ex: a boygirl who calls herself a lesboy, or a pangender who calls themselves a turigirl)
ftms & mtfs may call themselves lesboys or turigirls as they may feel because of their experience as a trans man ) their attraction is still inherently queer
- Priority Attraction
a mspec mono may value their attraction to one gender over the others more, and label themselves as such
- SAM
an mspec mono may call themselves an mspec mono as they may use the SAM. They may be monosexual and mspecromantic or the other way around
- Abrosexuality
people who identify as abrosexual/abroromantic may use the label mspec mono as they may be mainly fluent in attractions to one gender
example: abrolesbian
Misconceptions
Bi-lesbians and other mspec lesbians are lesbiphobic.
No, they dont erase mono lesbians, theres a reason its labeled Mspec-lesbian
Lesboys are just trying to get into lesbian communities so lesbians feel pressured to date them.
As an mspec lesboy, no❤. Transphobes use that arguement btw. Again, we call ourselves lesBoys
Q&A
Why wouldnt an attraction priority mspec just call themselves omni?
just because a term applies, doesnt mean the person has to like it or use it.
Glossary
Mspec mono -
a person whos both multisexual and monosexual
Multisexual-
(sometimes called Bi-spec) is any attraction that is towards Two or more genders
Monosexual-
any attraction thats towards one gender
QLW-
Queer love for women
QLM-
Queer love for men
NMLNM-
Non-men loving Non-men
NWLNW-
Non-women loving Non-women
WLW-
Women loving women
MLM-
Men loving men
Contact me
If I missed anything, or you have a question please contact me.
ways to reach me:
tumblr (send me an ask / dm)
Google form
Notes
I focused on mspec monos with this but honestly most of this stuff applies to gaybians lesboys and turigirls too
Words are made up go silly go stupid
made by a bi-lesboy system host