updated: 7:00pm 7th july

re-doing this note to you both, because quite frankly im sick of both of your victim complexes. id also like to add that cian has reached out on multiple ocassions on my behalf to let dan know i am willing to apologise (even though i dont need to apologise for defending myself) and he has complained and refused. this entire situation would have been avoided if dan and his friends stopped harassing me, stalking me, getting others to stalk me and twist the story around. im no longer going to stay quiet about my experiences with this emotionally abusive friendgroup, and i know for a fact im not the only person who is the victim of this. im giving me and others a voice.

for starters, i never called you a "pedophile" kaito. thats one way to make it all about you! i talk about how dan is actively friends with multiple minors and incredibly sexual while hiding his entire identity, which is fucking weird and very pedophilic - which a lot of people agree with me on, because why do you need to "stay anonymous" whenever a large portion of your friends are younger than 16? furthermore, you are actively putting yourself in danger of being groomed by pedophiles like dan because you are extremely sexual. that has nothing to do with "sexual development" or me commenting on your "sexual development". that is me bringing up a red flag that i know is very much a red flag. it isnt me throwing around terms for the fun of it, it is me coming from a point of view when i work with kids, that i know is a red flag due to child protection things i have had to take part in within the job, alongside seeing it first hand twice this year alone at work (i work in a secondary school with kids 11-18). also kaito, using the minor card to get away with everything youve done is disgusting. take accountability.

furthermore, what youve done is doxxing. using photos of me without my consent and showing the tens, and most likely hundreds, of people in a sinister manner is doxxing. refusing to delete photos of me, take down photos of me that were put up without my consent, is doxxing. you are using photos of me in a sinister manner and you both know this. if it was the other way round and i used photos of any of you against you which id never do because i actually have self respect, yous would all be claiming that youve been doxxed too. my profile picture being me on two occassions on a website only people i know can access (which you have both stalked, alongside getting people like vixen to stalk my tiktok which i have literal proof of via the 'profile views' setting) is not an invitation to use photos of me to doxx me. cian already explained this to you dan and you refused to delete the photos of me knowing i do not give consent to them being shared. if you continue to refuse to delete photos of me that you have zero consent to own, i will take further action and i genuinely do mean this.

thirdly, claiming i "stalk" and "harass" you both. for starters, holding you both to account in dms is not harassment. please learn the actual definition of it. also, how can i 'harass' two people who have me blocked and hidden? a status isnt harassment because a lot of the things dan used (such as me venting in my status) wasnt even about him - it was something completely different. also sorry to break it to you, but yous dont really make me self harm. i was self harming over something completely different and the fact you even used self harm against me AGAIN to try and prove a point is laughable. and i do not stalk yous. infact i barely even play ponytown anymore, i have no reason to. if we wanna talk about stalking, lets talk about getting people like vixen to look at my tiktok at least 3 times a month, the constant viewing of everything i do, stalking my rentry dni to try and throw a fit, assuming shit in cians status is about yous when it isnt, and so much more. you both actively stalk all of my socials INCLUDING PATREON if you even knew my pfp was me, yet claim IM the issue? what? genuinely how does that make sense. if anything i genuinely forgot about you all because i simply do not care for it. my point is also proven about removing cre from my dni yet i removed him because i have a new discord account, i dont play on pg and im no longer associated with any of you. again, i forgot he existed and honestly removing him from my dni was very beneficial for my own wellbeing. plus, due to no longer being on pg except for the odd time joining pie, no longer associated w any of you etc - i see no reason for him on my dni. he cannot bother me because im very luckily no longer with the emotionally abusive + controlling friendgroup that was all of you. trying to make me look bad for removing him is stupid. if anything lets talk about you trying to accuse me of lying about being raped.

you also claim to have done nothing kaito, but lets talk about how you called me selfish for selfharming and used my nana dying of cancer against me for a reason why i shouldnt self harm as if seeing my nana slowly dying in the hands of cancer werent the literal causes of my mental health deteriorating? or how you compared me to a neo-nazi because i couldnt take my meds? or how after finding out i was muslim before i converted back into being a roman catholic you would repeatedly send 9/11 gifs and say "jai ruined my birthday month!!" which is honestly weird that you associated 9/11 with me after finding out i used to be muslim. or the multiple ira jokes - jokes i can make because im irish, yet you never even knew what the ira or the troubles even were until after i briefly mentioned it? both of these which are jokes i simply went along with because i was too uncomfortable to speak out. which a lot of this entire situation is based off of: me being belittled whenever i expressed my feelings, being emotionally manipulated, controlled on who i could and couldnt talk to, and being spoken over. not to mention you and dan would actively call cian abusive, yet never mentioned disgust at cal, a literal rapist. its also funny how cian was suddenly abusive as soon as you found out it was a black man. this just shows both of your views on different religions, races and identities.

finally, lets talk about the stuff said to, about and towards cian. the abuse claims were fucking ridiculous. someone being under the influence of heavy alcohol is not abusive. i was scared at the time as i am absolutely terrified of cis men due to trauma, to me it feels like you both used this against me to try and make me scared of one of the only cis men who i feel safe around and know care about me. furthermore, the sexual stuff. i made a sexual joke about me and cian because he is my boyfriend. dan and toby have made sexual comments about me and cian before we were together and i had a partner at the time while knowing that during this time, cian was my caregiver during age regression. why you thought it was right to sexualise the bond between a regressor and a caregiver is something i will never understand - and no, me saying that before regressing + me and cian were together that he is the only cis man who did not force sex with me is not consent for any of you to make sexual comments. you had no consent from me or cian to sexualise our bond. you continued to do so after being asked multiple times to stop. i have consent from cian and he has consent from me however to make these comments as we are in a relationship. if you cannot respect such a simple boundary of consent, i cannot imagine how either of you are actually like. but honestly that explains the multiple times dan has tried to imply that i lie about being raped.

UPDATE 1 saying cian "should take responsibility" for what he did when you dont even know him is crazy... here is what he has to say. important

UPDATE 2 i want to focus on this from your note because it honestly baffles me uhm firstly, that "apology" isnt an excuse nor is it a proper apology. you made a joke towards me, a muslim at the time (i have now converted as islam was not for me) about causing 9/11, indirectly calling me and other muslims a terrorist. you made an islamophobic joke towards me. not only this, but you + the others making jokes about me being in the IRA because "jai did it" is so fucked. 1) i can make the jokes, im irish/welsh and therefore its my joke to make, people say this alot here. 2) you guys continued. the IRA was a REPUBLICAN (not nationalist) terrorist group. the fact you not only made jokes about me causing 9/11 but also apparently being in the IRA is so odd. age isnt an excuse. you know what you did was fucked and age will never be an excuse for making islamophobic jokes + jokes about a terrorist organisation that killed many people during the troubles whenever youre a privileged american who has zero say in ireland, the history of ireland etc. secondly, why are you comparing me mourning my nanas death from leukemia to your 9/11 jokes towards me? i had absolutely every right to not prioritise some white cis man who is clearly too fucking sensitive to cope with the fact treating people like shit during their hardest point in their life DOES have consequences. i dont owe any of you an apology because quite frankly, the way i reacted is justified. and the fact youre mad i didnt prioritise any of you while i was mourning the death of someone so close to me is MADDENING. also not to mention the fact someone dying from leukemia and you making an islamophobic joke about me and saying im a member of a terrorist group are two very different things. stop being so surprised people literally cannot apologise whenever they cant even function as a proper human being for weeks due to losing a loved one. if you claim you have had people die, you would know this too.but alright!

CONCLUSION

you can try to expose me all you want, but i know the full story. this is not the first time you have all done this to someone who has finally spoken out about how they feel (who im not naming because i no longer talk to it). it honestly sickens me how yous couldnt just handle this properly instead of having a victim complex whenever i express how i feel, my side of the story. its so embarrassing. stop doxxing me, stop harassing me and stop twisting the story around completely to seem like the victim. and to those who have listened to me and read all of this, thankyou. pookie home

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Pub: 02 Jul 2023 17:01 UTC
Edit: 07 Jul 2023 18:00 UTC
Views: 297