Wol's Junta

Excellent work. An engaging, sustained dialogue, almost a one-act play, embedded with ~forty years of politics, marital strain, shame, conviction, fear, hope. Lived-in, believable quasi South American (?) exiles, so brings to mind Saramago, Death and the Maiden, Blood Kin with similar unspecified "exotic" dictatorships. Expository info handled nicely and delivered solidly without condescension/handholding exclusively through the extended dialogue, save for the final beautiful image of O wistfully remembering the helicopters and wheeling stars. Great contrast and summary achieved in this final sentence, the longest and most "writerly", by its juxtaposition against all the speech and incidental 'stage' actions before it, like all the arguing and accusation and the meaning before it is distilled, a haiku to close out a mini epic poem. Fine ear for slightly ESL phrasing and idioms without feeling token or forced, and great reserve in showing only the sharp edge of almost half a century's worth of resentment and isolation. I usually squint at extended dialogues but this causes me to reassess my prejudice and practice more. A great favourite. A pleasure to read. Thanks, and please keep on writing.

Pancakesyrup's Wotan

The strongest voice in the collection, and a man after me own heart: a geezer on a stint, and one educated and estate-savvy enough to use "spazzed out" and "variegated" with equal aplomb, and convincing in both registers, producing a third type of vernacular. Nods to A Clockwork Orange and Irvine Welsh, in slanguage but moreso in state-correctional control and otherworldly entities, with just one surrealist aspect enough to emphasise the nightmare of (his) reality. Great bloody imagery of Wotan's self-mutilation against the properness of the courtroom, and against the blank utilitarianism of our man's cell and computer room. The chocolate cataloging makes great sense and is just the right kind of idiosyncrasy; what else to fill the void after junk and no NA circle in this prison. I could listen to our man's pontification all day, as I think others could too, and I hope to read more at some point because this feels like an intro to something a little (or maybe a lot) larger. Triffic stuff, an absolute top pick. So fee fi, Englishmun, thanks for letting me read, keep on writing.

meteor's Frankenstein

Wonderful, the work of a true adept. To be able to bust out on the fly an "honestly [...] platonic" woman friend with sharp thin compass elbows and a not-quite smoking addiction is beyond impressive. Intimidatingly self-assured, solid as granite, professional control and precision evidenced in every line. Nods (again, though maybe this is just me showing my lack of education) to A Clockwork Orange, Tarzan, the savage in BNW, but updated to the slick 21st C. socially acceptable freakshow of reality TV and that much more sinister for it. Can feel my stomach sink because this'll probably air later this year. Utterly convincing and fleshed-out storyworld, complete with ratings estimates, intended demographics, pet projects and industry acquaintances. Surely qualifies as a miracle to write something so well realised in basically no time at all. Echo of Zack Busner (or even Benway) in Dr. Kittle, but firmly embeds itself as the New Americana. Time jumps and catchups are a marvel. I could go on and on, but I think between mine and every other anons' glowing praise you should be convinced this is something pretty special and you're a fucking juggernaut. A foregone conclusion that this wins or places at the very least, if there's any justice, if anything I think has any remote relation to reality. Brilliant stuff, and for all our sakes please keep on writing.

Duck's Method of Escape

Consistently hilarious, with a great relish for absurdity and madcap activity. The surreal oasis hallucination at the very end is incredibly well captured, tactile, sensuous, utterly immersive -- and then to wake up to his usual old funk, totally dismiss the epiphany/revelation and continue scrounging like nothing happened is pitch-perfect comedy and tragedy simultaneously. Well fucking done, dude. Dialogue is great, funny, and adds a different shade of humour to the more wry observations of the narration. Colourful cast of characters, and a great dream-logic system of prison currency. Something Hellerish in the asides, and something HST-manic in the action. Tight, funny descriptors. Short and sweet and knows what it's trying to be and succeeds brilliantly. Loved it man, keep on writing.

wingo's The Last Woman and the First

Very cool stuff. The new heir to the Dying Earth tradition, with greater emphasis on biopunk and 'magic' than Wolfe (RIP). And like Wolfe cryptic and tantalising enough to urge rereads and re-rereads. Obviously a fragment of a much, much larger work, one I hope to read more of in these threads or on sffg. Easy prose, balanced descriptions, just enough said to conjure an image/idea without getting bogged down, always moving to the next point of interest. Great variation of high tone between Mingo's and King Sutha's speech, the regal tongue slightly warped by aeons of time passed. Loved the replication/division of Mingo's minions, the goblins, the deep lore only mentioned in passing and never shoved down the throat. A lot here to admire and inspire re depth and economy and total worldbuilding without falling into the trap of making the built world static and the end goal; no, it feels like here plot (whatever it ends up being exactly) will still be king. Deeply impressed. Thanks for showing us, keep on writing.

Mordred's Grave for a Gravemaker

Very nice hook, I'm guessing a prologue to a much grander epic. And already signs of transcending western tropes with the mc's advanced age, perhaps immortality, and the inclusion of bread crumbs of swords, chainmail, as well as the sly introduction of some larger enemies/factions in Valens, Wesson, etc. Something so primal and raw about the western genre, even updated to NCFOM or The Road, that McCarthy was always probing regardless of setting. The lawlessness, I guess, even in The Counsellor, that no matter the established rule it still is and will always be Hobbes, jungle law, eat or be eaten, etc. Same with the division of a man trying to be civil and polite while hiding the maniac inside. So this whole story/world seems rife with possibility, great potential for a character study of Ehrin/Gravemaker, the tension within him. Anything that can nod to Unforgiven and Berserk at the same time has got to be good. So well done man, a great start, keep on writing it.

more to come tmrw _____

Edit

Pub: 06 Mar 2025 16:39 UTC

Edit: 06 Mar 2025 16:40 UTC

Views: 79