ASS VGL23 Episode 2
Hour 1

Beebs hates PES17
Reso's PES is 16
Beebs can't analyze 17 games because they seem like nothing, nothing, nothing, oh they scored
QD doesn't mind 17 because it hasn't been overused yet
Beebs wants 16, doesn't care that Nomo wants portraits which crash the game anyways
Kiyose had to look up what KWABOTY meant
Beebs doesn't need it, already has spaghetti awards
Ramen compressed teams every VGL without telling in the past and no one noticed
This image is posted >>504427530
Bird arrives
Beebs and Toki hate 17, Reso and Bird like it
Ramen has always been right about /2hug/
Every starting game was a draw
Beebs updated OBS, has only caused problems
Beebs does ASS in the dark
87 minutes of /alter/ domination without automentalities
/alter/ was the better team, might regret only getting a draw out of it
/gbfg/ still running their stupid pastebin
automentalities apparently based on simple instructions
Reso says Beebs is being cursed by an Indian, ASS gets confused over which kind of Indian
/@/ dominated, /skg/ looked hapless
/@/'s player being dumb only good thing for Beebs of the matchday, along with really ded
Lebron is Reso's sunshine, his pooky bear
/skg/ might play better with manager changes, especially since /gbfg/ is still doing the exact same thing
Reso doesn't believe in /skg/ because he believed in them earlier
Beebs thinks they can at least beat /gbfg/, Ramen thinks the opposite and that /gbfg/ will do something different, has no evidence
/@/ looks very good, did better once Reso stopped believing in them
/alter/ should put up a fight
Beebs felt gotten all day
/twg/ left a lot on the table, 14 shots
Starwalker was a hero, MotM
Toki says /twg/ was robbed
someone said autos don't look good, Nomo says its a usual turnout. /esg/ should've won
Beebs thinks /twg/ got robbed, doesn't know if its an export issue
/utg/ played not to lose and refused to let /twg/ shoot
/utg/ does not look like the worldbeaters people thought they'd be, only won because /twg/ couldn't shoot
are they setup to be shit? were the off target shots due to /twg/ being bad or /utg/ being good?
Nomo loves the phrase "force bad shots"
Merzbow is alive
/aceg/ was really good, first win on PES17 ever
BoB joins
/pcrg/ looks terrible
last VGL gave Ramen no reason to rate /pcrg/
Beebs never had doubt /aceg/ would win
all pick /aceg/ to win
will find out if /utg/ got lucky or actually forces bad shots
all also pick /twg/ to win
will find out if /twg/ was shit or just faced a good defense
/pcrg/ was last good in VGLX-2, only win since then was /ink/ in qualifiers
Toki thinks management team needs to find their feet
sad that /pcrg/ is bad, fun team with good fans
the more kots that join other teams, actual Kot loses power like Space Jam
Bird thinks /pcrg/ might be the new /aceg/
sometimes just need to get blown out to know what to change
Ramen thought /hsrg/ was worse than /smbg/ for most of the game
sad that /hsrg/ doesn't win more
/smbg/ had wacky goals but looked solid
Shiddy was not a meme before he was on the team
a forced meme than became an actual meme, unlike /vm/'s Ronaldo
Beebs totally disagrees with Toki, thought /hsrg/ was the better team
/smbg/ was reduced to 30MB
Ramen was just underwhelmed by /hsrg/
Beebs again brings up that PES17 is nothing, nothing, nothing, oh look a goal
this is very similar to actual divegrass, which is why Beebs doesn't like it
the closer a game is to actual divegrass the worse it is, which is why PES16 is the best
Streak the FREAK joins
Nomo thought /fgog/ was the better team than /omg/ even before /omg/'s +2
/omg/ really only had one surge
Drek was Drekful
Streak crashed, is married to Aaron Rodgers
the New York Jets got a brace, Redman was stuck to setup

Hour 2

Streak is about to be arrested
/omg/ is a glass cannon which is their usual MO
BoB says /omg/ should use finii goalie more because she has a nice ass
Beebs didn't know it wasn't required to have a backup keeper
the 4cc rule change allowing for one keeper has patchnote from Lear that says "Fuck you Ramen"
Beebs gets bricked up when he sees his name
all lean towards /fgog/ over /smbg/, but worry that they job at the worst times
Nomo thinks /fgog/ might be the best team in the group, Beebs thinks it's /hsrg/
Streak is freed from the cop
Beebs says "how the sausage is made," more food analogies are demanded
all also lean towards /hsrg/, just has to hold off a glass cannon
wishes that Omega Strikers did not kill their own game, make another game, then kill that too
nuh-uh, yuh-huh, Grigori dying is a classic Beebs moment
Grigori's death was really late, but still killed any change of an equalizer
both /vrg/'s goals were corner headers, Nomo might have tears streaming down his face
IR1 was something Incoming pushed for VGL15 because it's funny
suggested because 19's chances of injury were low, forgot about it on return to 17
everyone freaked out after 2 really deds, hasn't been one since
but everytime someone goes down now people will worry since the chance is there
Incoming who? VGLco with another good decision
complaining about injuries is the same as more red cards
guy in shitpost box who wanted more blood must be happy
NepFRAUDs can't keep getting away with it
Reso was mad, /nepgen/ always does this
you could see the /nepgen/ goal coming before it happened
/esg/ auto looks solid
VGLco wins again, gave a new team another barnburner debut
Beebs argues with an ESL
BEEBS
Beebs was too busy breeding to make the breeding patch
Nomo thinks /ddg/ will come out stronger, others think /nepgen/ will bullshit another win
QD thinks /nepgen/ will bullshit their way out on draws
WHERE IS RABI
we will never get /e7g/, no one plays epic seven, it's a psyop
/e7g/ was going to make a team but the guy interested didn't have a PC
Rabi took it to watch American Dad
/e7g/ has to be the general with the most VGL airtime without being involved at all
Rabichads run the /vg/ League from the shadows
Rabi is on topic bwo
ASS can name more about Epic Seven than Eversoul
Eversoul is played by Southeast Asians
good thing they have a commentator
Player of the Day was Bad Man
Toki likes teams that have goalhorns that aren't just in-game music, always liked /gfg/'s exports
4cc boards are generalist and can horns from wherever
there are teams with really good in-game music that can be used too, like /vgt/
Beebs remembers /drag/'s good export
be creative with your export
Ramen also likes /akg/'s export with a combination of in-game and shitpost music, but doesn't want to suck them off too hard
/esg/ get another goalhorn, reminded QD of AGL's /kfb/, reminded Beebs, Nomo, and Toki of a VTL team
Group E is terrorism
robbery that /gfg/'s player wasn't carded for murdering Pottis
Beebs is the biggest GFL2 hater
everyone is dead, but actually maybe not
all these four teams are middle eastern
/tf2g/ has an excuse for 20 minutes of their game
Ramen has no recollection of /pmmm/-/ink/, 87 minutes of nothing
Reso has vendettas against /pmmm/ and /wtg/, hates them on a personal level for terrorism
all /pmmm/ does is get away with sucking ass, King Fug kept choking
one of /gbfg/'s refs feels like a bought ref like Robocop, might be an NBA ref
no one happy about next week's matchups, some pick /tf2g/ since they'll have 2 golds, some think that /pmmm/ will do more bullshit
Beebs feels /gfg/ will lose because he hates them, causes /gfg/'s manager to cry
/ink/ will get 0 points, score 0 goals, and go back to qualifiers, just as planned
Nomo loves pet team posts
/vgt/-/gbpen/ was a great game
/vgt/'s Suspension player is hilarious
/vgt/ found a way to make car models funny, impressed Toki because teams with those models usually look like shit
Kaz is Luffy
he literally farms quails
peak 57 year old do-er
Ramen pronounces Zucchini as zoocheenee
the ZOO-CHINESE?!
Kaz D. Zucchini
/gbpen/ were dominant in the first half, then /vgt/ made changes and were better
/lcg/ was free for /akg/
/lcg/ were lucky not to lose by 6, they only scored 2 because /akg/ has the worst keeper in the league
Block Cero has to be the only keeper to redirect a clearance in her own goal twice, exact same play as 10 VGLs ago
/lcg/ posting their test results let /akg/ know that /lcg/ wasn't testing them on the right sliders
once again a team overshares, /lcg/ tests had /akg/ with 1 cross and then they had 20
/akg/'s DMF situation is crazy, Platato's goal was ridiculous
/lcg/ scored then Zero Sanity immediately decided to show up again
Danteh was invisible all 90 minutes
Toki observed that /lcg/'s original defense worked to an extent, forced Donkey to go wide
once they switched presets Donkey was just able to run right down the middle
/lcg/ both offensively and defensively looked awful, Beebs felt they went too much off testing
Ramen attributes some of it to experience with 17 between the two teams
Beebs and Toki note that /akg/ has never lost on PES17
/akg/ stop farming wins against /lcg/
BoB points out that Danteh was not on screen at all for /lcg/'s first goal
his only positive play was having his pass intercepted leading to /akg/'s assisted own goal
/lcg/'s midfield had such a hole that Danteh was always forced to track back
/akg/ got rid of all their Pipis but now they are all Gremlins
Beebs declares this group the freest of all time
Ramen thinks /vgt/-/akg/ will be a great game
/gbpen/-/lcg/ could kill a team
/gbpen/ were solid in their first game, unlike /lcg/. /lcg/ will need changes
Toki says /lcg/ has turned a pig's ear into a silver purse before, Beebs is offended that no one cared while he got yelled at for saying "how the sausage is made"
all pick /gbpen/
Nomo picks /vgt/, gets HUH'd
Ramen and QD expect a tight match, Beebs doesn't think /akg/ can be beaten
/pg/ good? /gig/ had decent offense but horrible defense
free group for /pg/? no, /snowg/ is probably really good
/ksg/ is weird, terrible offense
Nomo thinks /gig/ might be the worst auto
ASS back on that /akg/ dick
ASS tries to figure out why /ksg/'s offense wasn't working, Beebs asks what creative playmaker does

Hour 3

Streak returns
/gig/ got a 90+1 red, obvious double yellow
Nomo is QD's woman
/snowg/ will roll over /gig/, just needs better finishing
/gig/ was the New York Jets
Fuck Jeannies may play next league, but not for /gig/
Toki suggests that having a Jets fan in VGLco has been a net detriment
why can't he be a fan of a good team? wait VGLco are also fans of the Colts, Bengals, Lions, Dolphins, Falcons, and Giants
at least Bird is a fan of the Ravens, Panthers fan Kekkels would've brought it down even more
HE declines Bird's membership into the Ravens fandom
/uma/ good, Nomo was always right about them
are /uma/ the Razorcakes of the VGL?
looked good against /psg/, /psg/ are also shit, /uma/ actually gets two shit teams
/uma/'s year babyyyyyyyyyyy
/uma/'s first real test might be the round of 16
/alg/-/uma/ will be a clash between two great teams
/alg/ will definitely beat /psg/ because /psg/ is shit
/dbg/ exists
Reso wants to hang Yajirobe from jumper cables
worst miss of the weekend
Yajirobe is Aaron Rodgers with the American flag
are they bad or was it a retard seed?
retard seed another of Nomo's favorite phrases
/dbg/'s midfield kept giving the ball away, Hypeman was awful, Broly and Jiren even worse
Goten was hilarious with /dbg/'s body uniforms
Ramen wants to think that drug-fuelled /dbg/ will find good changes, have done it before
if /dbg/ can beat /uma/, then their last game is free points
Toki calls /psg/ /gbpen/2, but less memorable since they don't annoy them
/psg/ needs more Miku
BoB wants more of the HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYY guy
Streak is not okay
Beebs says that even though Streak is an asshole, he inexplicably feels symphathetic for him
ASS is confused on how Streak is an asshole
/psg/ looks like cup winner /vg/ with Tech managing them, well there's the issue
Streak dropped water on his computer, wait no he was joking
Player of the Day was Platato, those DMFs went crazy, had a nuts goal
funnier that she has no reactions
/alter/'s hype was just Friday Night
Group I was fun
/smtg/ threw the steering wheel out the window twice
they controlled the whole match and threw away the lead twice
got the lead, threw it away, got it back, threw it away in the same way
Beebs thought it was bold
/smtg/ did well when they pressured /llsifg/, but stopped pushing whenever they got the lead
What Was He Cooking? /smtg/ and /nikg/'s busparking
/nikg/ had all of the first match to see busparking not work, and still did it
stop turtling, get a bigger lead
Yeehaw Turtle doesn't have a definition, it's just used by one person
Streak gets it sometimes you want to hold onto a lead, Beebs asks how would he get that
People are coming from 19 where this would've worked
PES19 is the best PES that ever existed, we should go back to it - QD
Why didn't we use 16? It was the best
this gameday took forever
Beebs says 16 matchdays didn't last long, QD and Ramen disagree
Beebs averaged 5 and a half hours, without live management
Can you imagine PES16 /hanny/-/hgg2d/ where after all 17 goals scored, Mabel takes a timeout to tell you to save a formation, load another formation, read a .png, and call your mom?
MERCIFULBELLUM, GRACIOUSBELLUM, KEKYPOW, YABBADABBADOO, WOWZERS, GIFTINGBELLUM, SANTABELLUM
QD leaves
/smtg/-/nikg/, Hitler vs Al-Qaeda
Toki thinks /xivg/ will stomp the rest of the group
Beebs remembers /xivg/'s comeback coming right after a /xivg/ flair started doomposting
/xivg/'s manager doesn't like his 4-3-3
Nomo thinks the 1-1-1-1 group can be anyone's group
VGL vods actually go up, not a side tournament
Nomo requests VGL edited /dbs/ posts put into the shitposting box
/2hug/ is certified bad
/2hug/ asked for a picture to be copied. Remember when /alg/ asked to just copy /bag/'s formation?
What Was He Cooking? /2hug/'s changes
/kfg/ might be the team to be, /2hug/ did not stop the bleeding
someone in chat thinks Serval's ass looks like a dick
ASS accused of riding /kfg/'s prickled cock
felt like /2hug/ had no gameplan
nothing working but still trying to make changes that don't work is how /2hug/ usually operates
2huminati is at Nomo's door
/vn/ robbed /mjg/
/vn/'s gameplan was trying to rob a point, testing was so bad that was the best they could hope for
/mjg/ got horrendously unlucky, /vn/ scored a bullshit header
/2hug/-/vn/ like two crippled children fighting
Beebs might've hopped off the /kfg/ train too early
Beebs immediately and repeatedly fact checked about VGL13
/bag/-/egg/ absolute cinema, 3 goal of the tournament contenders
defense swiss chess or offense really good?
/wtg/ and /sthg/ also competent in attack
/bag/-/egg/ really close, /wtg/ on the front foot more against /sthg/
maybe /sthg/ was confused by all their players being the same
What Was He Cooking? Sonic's aesthetics
Nomo thought that /sthg/ was going to have revamped aesthetics, and then he saw a boxhead for a player with an existing model
they were scared of their export being too big
music was bad but maybe the general has shit taste and wanted that
chat suggests that /sthg/ doesn't care
want to make them care? make them not look like an AGL team. caretaker didn't make aesthetic requests
Sonic has a million models for use, where is everyone?
Nomo hopes the caretaker turns it around. /sthg/ had bare minimum interest, had a promise that they would be made interested, and then submitted that
Beebs believes in them
Who is worm milk?
Reso hopes both /wtg/ and /bag/ die
Opinions split between who will win
Papa Daniel is the first medal on /wtg/ that Nomo thinks is funny, states that that's an exaggeration
Duce? Racist? Gay Jew? Vehicles for this feel? Hilarious.
Beebs liked everything about /forza/ except Forza
All pick /egg/ over /sthg/ except Streak who thinks Sonic always wins
Nomo explains Papa Daniel
/sthg/ is begged for a drastic improvement

Hour 4

/hgg2d/-/hanny/ was the most painful match Reso ever streamed
every single goal a concession timeout
Beebs loves /hgg2d/'s autism
enjoy your -2 on kickoff then back to neutral then back to -2 against /hanny/
Beebs says that's the same as /2hug/
Reso was impressed by /hanny/
Reso made 3-0 the most dangerous lead
/hgg2d/ and /hanny/ probably the two good teams in the group
hard to tell if /domg/ were good or /indie/ bad, or anything in that game
Reso thought nothing would happen and then Black Servant had a goal of the tournament contender
not a single person picked /domg/
/indie/ were bad, trvth nvke
saddest VGL moments: /hgg2d/ blowing out /domg/
Beebs thinks /indie/ will figure it out
none of the 3 qualifier teams scored
/dng/ will be the only qualifier team to avoid VGL24 qualifiers, they would've scored
Bird says /mjg/ has the highest potential of the 3
each game got one goal worse
usually making it out of qualifiers is a positive thing
/uma/ was the only NTC3 team to win
Beebs is still not on the /ink/ train
Nomo be on those woomies until he weyyo
Nomo loves /ink/
Player of the Day, JOP
Kai Havertz, Bean Daddy
Streak soapbox, Yajirobe made Streak want to kill him and himself
Yajirobe has scored as much as /ink/
Beebs will continue shitting on /ink/
everyone stands by their group predictions that they don't remember
the Koreans are plapping ASS with their predictions

End

Edit

Pub: 03 Dec 2024 03:19 UTC

Edit: 03 Dec 2024 03:20 UTC

Views: 123