spongebob squarepants :3
eve spongebob squarepants oshi main main² urls
“Oshi” is used for idols and celebrities whom you like. It means “I like and support". I LUV SPONGEBOB 




there's this yellow rectangle. he's a sponge? but like... not like in nature. he's a literal dish sponge. sentient. porous. so many holes. he lives under the sea?? in a pineapple????? like not attached to anything. it just... grew?? fell??? from space????? no one asks. he's got this snail right. gary. meows like a cat. purrs. reads. might be smarter than everyone else. also spongebob brushes his teeth with like, toothpaste made of sand? maybe?? or coral paste?? IDK. don't look too hard. so spongebob works at THE KRUSTY KRAB, which is like, underwater mcdonalds but run by a crab who screams about money every 3 seconds his boss mr krabs is basically a lobster in a midlife crisis he has a cash register that's also an octopus therapist (squidward) who hates his life and plays clarinet like it's a cry for help also there's a burger called the krabby patty and the recipe is like. holy. sacred. guarded like it's nuclear launch codes BUTTTTT this little green bean called PLANKTON wants the recipe so he can make his gross food at the chum bucket™, which is 0 stars on yelp and smells like betrayal he built a computer wife (karen), who is smarter, funnier, and hotter than he is. she roasts him daily. it's beautiful


spongebob's daily routine: (ृ ुω´)ु⠀wakes up. screams. feeds gary? gary sometimes feeds HIM. goes to work. aggressively flips patties. may or may not talk to them. fails boating school again for the 483rd time blows bubbles, annoys Squidward, karate chops a squirrel, collapses in bed dreams about jellyfish and/or sentient pickles
DRIVING TRAUMA: spongebob goes to boating school every day. He’s been going for like 15 seasons. he cannot drive. he presses the gas and everything explodes. mrs. puff (the teacher) inflates like a balloon every time he enters the building. she is SO tired. she's probably committed insurance fraud just to avoid him.




spongebob is chaos in a tie. he is joy and noise and soap bubbles. he might be immortal. he might be god.he loves jellyfish. burgers. karate. and he’ll never ever pass his driving test.