unlucky number 013...

hi. i'm Max, i'm the ex host & shell of this system, but as of right now am almost never fronting whatsoever so i can rest internally and finally take a break

i have severe cPTSD and intense trauma responses and mood swings as a result
rejection sensitive dysphoria and abandonment issues are also really bad, and i have a tendency to regress into a traumatized child state when certain things or situations are triggered
please be gentle and patient with me

i will us 'i' instead of 'we' often when fronting due to 🐚 even though nobody else in our system does, please keep this in mind;
i also have several different "forms" i can take on in innerworld and have subsystems corresponding to each as a result of 🐚 as well, in case that ever gets confusing: it's still me, same person, same alter, just presenting different in innerworld

more to be added

I'm mostly brainmade/👼 origin but i've introjected extra sources too
italic = extremely prominent
bold = absolutely vital

sources: • playlist of songs i've introjected,
all of which vary in intensity/prominence for me
the musician NF (is a subsystem)
The Song of Achilles
Achilles from Greek mythos (👼: 📚)
the serpent in the Garden of Eden (👼: 📚🕊🐍)
Lucifer in Paradise Lost (👼: 📚🕊)
Frisk & Chara from Undertale (👼: 🎥📚🪞👥)
Flowerfell!Frisk
• noncanon SAW fragment (result of fusion)

kins:
Five Hargreeves from The Umbrella Academy
Eddie Kaspbrak from IT Chapter 1
Max from Camp Camp
Virgil Sanders from Sanders Sides
MJ from the MCU
Sam Holt from the indie horror game Love, Sam
Tracey from Thirteen
Soul 22 from Pixar's Soul
Gwen from The Black Phone
Coraline from Tim Burton's Coraline

coping links:
Hamilton's Angelica Schuyler
Viktor Hargreeves from The Umbrella Academy
Evie from Thirteen
Finney from The Black Phone
Dan Torrance from The Shining & Doctor Sleep

(more to be added, continuously updating) ⠀⠀ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏ ͏͏͏⠀⠀⠀
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boundaries:

• ask me whether or not i want to discuss my sources, most of them i introjected as a by-product of grief and mourning and are sore spots as a result; they're also deeply and incredibly personal to me and i'm likely to get defensive if you try to claim or act more entitled to any of them than i am, especially those that are bolded

• i don't care about sourcemates so don't ask thinking i'll be enthusiastic about interacting with anyone just because of a source/kin/etc of mine

ask first before giving any form of affection. if i don't know you, chances are the answer will be a hard no. especially for touch, do not touch me without some kind of warning beforehand, plus it's also just reserved for loved ones anyways

• teasing/playful banter is accepted if you're a friend or closer, otherwise maybe don't just to be safe :/

• 100% okay with nicknames, please give me some; ask about pet names, i usually will only accept these from loved ones and family members

• do not ask me to front unless you're my dad or my partner. period. i avoid front as much as i possibly can and i'm not about to change that just because a rando wants to talk to me specifically.

• don't use tonetags on me, i hate them and specific ones make me incredibly paranoid; ask me to clarify my tone if needed

• i'm polyam but i'm also aro and incredibly romance repulsed; PLUS i'm underage, don't flirt with me you fuckin weirdos

• i'm prone to anxiety/panic attacks, melt downs, explosive outbursts of anger, shut downs, crying/grief spells, and more. interact with caution and by your own discretion.

• more to be added

extra pages:

0102030405

Edit
Pub: 22 Mar 2023 21:56 UTC
Edit: 11 Jun 2024 01:47 UTC
Views: 621