Intimacy and romance
This Valentine's Day I took my wife out for dinner. Not only was it Valentine's Day, but it is also the anniversary of the day I proposed marriage to my sweetie. As we sat down to dinner, I couldn't help but notice all the other couples sitting in the restaurant. Some of the younger ones spoke quietly, smiling at each other and seemed to be genuinely in love. Then there were the other older couples, who, except for a few exchanges sat there in silence, lost in their thoughts, looking around the room, appearing to be bored.
I really have no idea what they were experiencing, but I couldn't help reflecting on my own relationship. How new and fresh it felt. In my mind there was no one in the room more beautiful than my wife. She was wearing a close fitting, but not tight, black dress and the ruby earrings I had given her for Christmas. On this night she wore her shoulder length hair up on her head with a few wisps of hair curling around her ears. She looked fantastic!
After we left the restaurant we walked hand in hand down the street, occasionally exchanging a kiss, happy to be in each other's company. And this feeling was not just because it was a special day. It is something I experience almost every day. It always brings a smile to my face when I first see my wife after a day's work is done. I love coming in through the door, seeing her face, giving her a smooch, and a pat on her behind. (All right, maybe several pats on the her behind, but who is counting?)
The love and desire we have for each other remains strong after almost seven years of marriage. Could that be a result of me taking her in hand? I really think so. I am not discounting other factors of attraction and compatibility, which are essential for a good relationship. Of course, there are many couples whose love has endured over the years without them ever having had a Taken In Hand relationship. But I truly believe when a man possesses the confidence and authority to take his woman in hand it creates an intimacy like none other I ever experienced. This intimacy grows out of the kind of respect and trust that I think is inherent in a relationship where the man knows that she belongs to him and she loves the feeling of being his woman.
Through our growing intimacy we have come to understand the genuine need we have for each other. In a recent conversation with an online friend, she asked why is it that people do not want to admit that they have a need for another person? She pointed out that when looking at internet personals how often she reads that a man or a woman is looking for an “independent” type, one who will respect their space, as if it is too much to admit the longing we all have for intimacy. Is our independence and self-reliance so valuable that we can't admit to a most basic need common to us all?
As many of us know, when a man confidently leads and his woman gracefully submits they discover what so many in this world want – the intimacy of a lasting romance. This is what taking my wife in hand has done for us.