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I think you really need to understand
I'm totally incapable of romance
If you hear me giving you compliments
It's just me trying to get inside your pants
If you try to get close to me you'll suffer

Hi :sweat: my name is Ivan or Oscar, but i do go by Colm or Cal aswell. Im bisexual and aro.
Im slavic, specifically german and polish. I have autism, depression, social anxiety and i struggle with intense paranoia. I love my boyfriends, and all of my friends, even if I may seem rude or scared! :smile: I am very mentally unstable.
I very heavily relate to 1, 2 and 3.
Songs I relate to include 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

bfyi
As said before, im very paranoid. I truly believe no one really wants to be my friend, please bare with me when i dont trust you. I might have a hard time responding, I struggle at talking to people Im not close to. I generally only talk about my interests, im very bad at small talk, comforting, etc. I can be mean aswell, but I usually dont mean anything seriously. Additionally, I am very sensitive and emotional. I take things too serious sometimes and struggle to tell jokes apart from truths. I might vent without knowing I am, I talk about what im going thru as it happens and tend to ignore everything else. I tend to get attached very fast, I might come off as clingy or needy. I have trust issues aswell. I overshare a lot, i dont acknowledge anything as weird when i type it out, it takes a while for me to realize things that could me misunderstood or stuff thats too innappropiate to share.

dni
I have no dni. I rarely ever block, I just prefer keeping interactions low with people that make me uncomfy.

IMPORTANT IMPORTANT OK
I double text and spam, i love attention. I constantly want to talk!! I usually respond very fast or in a timely matter, and i get sad if you dont / ignore me. Sometimes i register no responses as hatred, and assume that you hate me. Im prone to overthinking over the smallest issues. I believe everyone hates me, and this belief will be stronger for some and lesser for some. I cannot help this, and I do NOT have anything against you personally.
I struggle at keeping relationships/friendships, so please acknowledge that you have to sometimes start conversations and lead them.
:cry:.. If you take too long to respond I will assume youre talking bad about me to someone else. I dont mean to be annoying I just have actual issues.
I have issues staying on topic, and i might struggle paying attention to your messages when I talk about my interests.
I have multiple personalites, and for my own comfort, i associate most of them with Buckshot. It helps me cope and is somewhat of a trauma response.

My main interests are Buckshot, Bladee and Brawl Stars! My favorite brawlers are Ziggy, Fang, Buster, Edgar, Meeple, Angelo, Gray, Byron, Pierce and ESP CHESTER!! I have him max rank, almost all of his skins (missing true gold/silver + woodspirit) and have his title. I am VERY interested in chester!! I love talking about him in any way!! I in general enjoy talking about brawl stars and my other interests!

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Pub: 09 Sep 2025 20:49 UTC

Edit: 29 Jan 2026 11:00 UTC

Views: 170